EmP

About Me:

Taking up all the good oxygen.

Find me complaining on twitter under @EmPIAm. Or not.


Yakuza 0 Blues
August 05, 2018

I want so hard to love Yakuza 0 now it's got a very fairly priced PC release, but it actively fights me every step of the way. For one, it's buggy as hell. You have to actively trick it just to get the bloody thing running.

I installed it, and it crashed seconds later. Uninstalled, ran it, same thing. Tried numerous fixes and eventually got it to boot up by unplugging my gamepad. Second loading screen say "Real Yakuza uses gamepads"

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One Sentence Reviews v3 - 32X Edition
June 17, 2018

::After Burner::

The best version of this game until the next one was made.

::BD Racers::

A bad clone of a Mario Kart clove populated by mascots you probably never knew existed.

::Blackthorne::

A thinking man's action platformer made by Blizzard before they took over the world via MMO.

::Corpse Killer::

Why the hell did Digital Pictures release this awful game three bloody times?

::Cosmic Carnage::

Updated a generic female sprite from the original Japanese release so that she was, instead, constantly on fire for exactly no reason.

::Darxide::

The most expensive bad time you can have this side of buying a Nottingham Forest season ticket.

::Doom::

Better than the 3DO port and maybe the awful SNES one.

::Fahrenheit::

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1 comment


Yesterday // Non-commentary Walkthrough // Complete
September 13, 2017

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Things I am Playing 2/2/17
February 02, 2017

Nerfarious:

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1 comment


Silence // Non-commentary Walkthrough // Complete
November 17, 2016


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5 comments


First Impressions - Haven
April 21, 2016

My trip through Haven has been interesting so far. Iíve not been obsessively tracking every tiny change throughout the year or so Iíve been aware of its existence, but Iíve watched enough to see how itís outgrown its stock RPGMaker roots and captured its own identity. You could, if you so desire, head on to Youtube to find years-old Letís Plays of the game and watch people plough through the prologue and some of the first chapter. Everything youíd see is now obsolete.

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Exploring [Dragon's] Dogma - Part One. Of probably one.
January 27, 2016

I don't know why I asked for a review code of Dragon's Dogma. No, seriously; I have no idea. I suppose I didn't really think it would drop -- the request was made on release date and it's a Capcom game, who have a bit of a history of not wanting to supply a lot of code. But that was cool; the release date came and went and I had two other games to plug away at, anyway. That was more than enough work without a fifty-hour odd game adding to that. A week past, I reviewed said games in an attempt not to let bloody Venter take an early marathon lead by reviewing more in a couple of weeks than he did for eleven months of 2015 when suddenly --

Jason Venter: Here is your review code for Dragon's Dogma.

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8 comments


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