EmP

About Me:

Taking up all the good oxygen.

Find me complaining on twitter under @EmPIAm. Or not.


Mini Reviews:
October 12, 2009

Raven Squad (360)

The bastard love child of a dodgy RTS and a shoddy FPS, rasied under powerlines and force-fed lead-based paint chips.

King of Fighters XII (360)

One mammoth step backwards.

FIFA '10 (360)

Friendship-ruiningly brilliant.

Risen (360)

Still yet to get old.

Half Life 2 (360)

Still yet to become worth my time.

Zeno Clash (PC)

Unplayable due to crappy laptop. Forces you to install Steam and, therefore, lame.

Mass Effect (360)

Much like WQ, doesn't care how little free time you have and demands your immediate and unceasing attention.

11 comments


FAO: Aussie userbase
August 23, 2009



HAHAHAHA!

6 comments


EmP on: T4
July 29, 2009

A while ago now, I was tricked into seeing Terminator 4. I say tricked because when we left the house, I though we were going to the pub. When we drove past the pub, I assumed we were going to a different pub. There was no pub. There was only something that had about the same effect on my poor brain as a cerebral bore coated in pure proof vodka.

I suppose it would be fair to say that if you turned off your brain then T4 isnít an awful film. The effects are okay, thereís action aplenty and no actors in the thing are stand out awful, but the entire film seems to have been penned by particularly de-evolved monkeys. The ones you usually find working under Michel Bay.

[read the full post...]

6 comments


Achievement Unlocked: 100 x 1000+ reviews
June 22, 2009

How many of your reviews have over 1000 hits? I have a hundred. Because people dig me.

13 comments


Achievement Unlocked: 200 Review Benchmark
June 20, 2009

Today with the double release of Junior Classic Games and Mystery Stories, Iíve stepped over the 200 review mark for HonestGamers. We shall now pause in wonderment that Venter has yet to erect a shrine in honour of all the free labour heís squeezed out of me over the years.

Pause silently, and the galling lack of hammering hits you harder still.

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1 comment


Worldwide love for Darts
June 09, 2009

From an online blog I found on the hit-tracker that linked to my latest Darts review. Not sure why it's been babblefished to hell, but it amused me, so it goes up here. That's how this blog rolls.

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What do you weigh? Check it into the open, then be ineluctable to sabbatical feedback or break in in with complete of your own!

Systems > Wii > P > PDC World Championship Darts 2009 > Staff Review

Sign into your narcotic addict account to scrutinize or sabbatical feedback seeking this ruminate on. fundamentally Donít have an account hitherto? fundamentally You can click here to unblock complete. fundamentally It but takes a baby, and itís complimentary!

Review at Gary Hartley
June 06, 2009

[read the full post...]

2 comments


Best Game EVER! What the hell?!
April 25, 2009

I rarely go over to FAQs anymore and when I do itís more out of habit than desire, but I went yesterday and saw they were running their lame Ďbest game everí bollocks which, what with FAQs being a snerd haven, is always won by some overrated Zelda game.

The bracket I saw was Deus Ex, Final Fantasy Tactics, Metal Gear Solid and Pokemon Gold/Silver. And Deus lost.

It came very fourth by a massive margin. Deus Ex, a game that turned gaming on its head, beaten by a game that asks you to watch poorly-rendered guards wiggle their butts, a strategy title that involves no strategy whatsoever and sodding Pokemon. Pokemon!

It's meant to be a gaming website, not a hive of infalliable dumbness.

/Nerd rage

19 comments


Additional Articles:

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