EmP

About Me:

Taking up all the good oxygen.

Find me complaining on twitter under @EmPIAm. Or not.


LORD OF THE LETTERS
December 25, 2008

Empleh16: I could take it.
DarkEtr: Surely you jest.
Empleh16: I'm an Alphamathon winner; I never jest.
DarkEtr: Bah, it's a fixed competition.
Empleh16: I'm also a Alphaolympics winner.
DarkEtr: You are?
Empleh16: So, really, I'm king of the Alphabet.
DarkEtr: No you are not.
Empleh16: Yes I am.
DarkEtr: At least not the lastest one, the one in which I was cheated of a high place.
Empleh16: And you will address me as sire.
Empleh16: I won either last year or the year before that.
Empleh16: I am the LORD OF THE LETTERS.

5 comments


Achievement Unlocked: 1000kb
November 22, 2008

Iím still not sure whether to be deeply proud or ashamed of this.

Running well behind schedule with a lot of reviews, so this figure is only going to climb with depressing speed. Next in line (deep breath) Disgaea DS, Crazy Mini Golf, Vampyre Story, Mini Big Bang (preview) Everquest II Complete, EUIII Complete and a few DS games that Iíve not even had time to open from their forever-mocking envelopes yet.

I've also got half-drafts of three different reviews that I need to finish up, but never have time because of all the ones I have to do for this site first. Grrr!

Someone shoot me now. Most of you are American; itís not like you canít spare the firearms.

7 comments


Achievement unlocked: 150 HG reviews.
September 27, 2008

Nighthmare Circus is the one hundred and fiftieth review I have written for this site. Youíve not done too badly out of me, you lot.

Iím not sure if itís fitting or disappointing that this landmark figure was reached through what is probably the worst game I will ever play. The next step, then is to chase and Catch Midwinter in the hit tables.

Youíre all required to pick your favourite EmP review and mash the refresh button for half an hour a day.

8 comments


Blacksite: Area 51
September 18, 2008

I just beat Blacksite: Area 51. Hereís some artwork to make this post look bigger.



Itís a short, by-the-number game that is beatable in, say, five hours. It was fun, but far from brilliant and Iíll probably burn though it on a harder setting at some point. Review forthcoming. However, this post is to talk about ending spoilers:

ENDING SPOILERS

[read the full post...]

2 comments


EmP bitches about: Anime
August 18, 2008

Itís not often I do posts like these because, frankly, I know you all look up to me as some unflapping totem of awesomeness and I donít like to drop in to normal conversation that Iím really just a huge geek like the rest of you, but sometimes, you should all just be happy to hear my opinion on things. So, Iím going to talk about anime -- which I watch.



Claymore is an anime about skimpily dressed barely post-teen girls battling huge demons that eat peopleís guts. Itís surprisingly gory and tries to tackle subjects with a maturity that usually behoves its genre. At times, itís sobering, graphic and depressing. It also has the single worst ending since Grandia.

[read the full post...]

13 comments


Achievment unlocked: 200,000+ hits
August 15, 2008

Do you have 200,809 hits, OD? I do.

I don't often look at my hits but I can remember a time when I was well behing MAsters and Ratking back when the table was first drafted -- look at me now! While I'm still way, way down on the top three, that's an almost scary amount of hits.

Go me, and such. Now, the unflagging praise from the rest of you!

4 comments


Tales of Oblivion
August 10, 2008

So, Iím at this point of the game where, to raise some allies, you have to go around closing a load of Oblivion gates that have popped up right outside some of the major towns. Itís optional for the most part and Oblivion gates are, by far, the dullest points of the game, but Iím trying to do everything so I can write a 20k review when Iím done.

Going into a gate is the same thing over and over. You storm through some Deadra. Some are hackers and slashers, some are mages and some exist in between. You have big lizards, spider demons and golems. The landscape is always the same and itís always a mini-maze dash to get to the big tower in the middle of the map to nick a stone and close the gate. Yawn.

[read the full post...]

4 comments


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