Clerks II

Apparently I'm writing this under the impression that this was actually a movie that a lot of people have seen. I'm going to assume it's not, but I'm going to rant about it anyway. DISCLAIMER: This post will contain spoilers.

So the other night, I saw Clerks II on Comedy Central. I was happy because after seeing the sheer brilliance that is the cartoon, I thought the movies would be just as good.

I was wrong.

What followed was a series of degenerate, never ending sex jokes with references to the most disgusting things people can do to one another. And animals. While things like that can be funny in moderation, it's really not good if the whole film seems to revolve around it. That any one character can barely speak more than one sentence without saying some variation of "Fuck" or "shit" doesn't help, either.

Well, this isn't entirely true. The whole plot revolved around co-protagonist Dante Hicks leaving New Jersey to start a new life with his too-sexy-for-him blonde fiancé. Of course, it wouldn't be Clerks if the rest of the film didn't involve Randall and others effectively ruining that goal. Which is where the comedy comes in. The film does have its moments, most of which don't involve utterly disgusting behavior or innuendo. And it's these that are appreciated. The nerd obsessed with LotR and all the jabs that come as a result is almost priceless, for example.

That said, due to the nature and execution of the movie, it completely lacks the utter wittiness and genius that created the cartoon, even though both were probably created by many of the same people, and both certainly featured the same actors. I suppose I chalk this up to the film industry's notion of comedy which for whatever reason assumes that everyone thinks masturbation jokes, exotic sexual acts, toilet humor, and gutter mouths make for great laughs. Well, they don't. At least not when beaten to the point where even the flies won't touch it. I suppose this kind kind of comedy used in excess appeals to some people - I'm thinking stoners and morons, mainly - but to me, it's just... meh.

I'm quite glad I saw this on TV, because whether they say "uncut and uncensored" or not, they still cut and sensor things. And according to my brother, who saw the real thing, I'm not really missing much.

That said, this experience won't make me think less of the cartoon. I still find that to be one of the most brilliant animated series ever created, and it's a shame it tanked the way it did. And I'd still probably see the first Clerks film, in the hopes that it has a bit more substance than this one. And by substance, I mean better comedic value because "substance" by its usual definitiion doesn't really apply to comedy.