I really enjoyed this review. Devilishly quirky game and those are often the hardest to really give a good sense about. You do a great job and thanks for actually going into detail with the plot instead of just an overview. I wanted you to do it and then you did. Really, it sounds very interesting and even unique.
I know there's a few grammar errors throughout, but it's late here so I didn't really try to catch them all. I did have a couple suggestions...
There is one line that's very confusing: "Though the eventual big reveal is gifted to you rather than discovered on your own merit, I found myself surprised at not really caring"
I thought you meant you didn't care about the plot. I think this is a really important line in the review, because what you are trying to say is that the plot is good enough to excuse even some of that same plot's delivery. I hope you fix this line to represent that more clearly.
Then, and I offer this to answer your opening line you might consider opening the review with this piece: "J.U.L.I.A plays out as a kind of sci-fi noir, having protagonist-of-sorts, astrobiologist Rachael Manners wake up in her deep-space probe’s cyro-chamber to find herself utterly alone and with no explanation as to where her entire crew has vanished to. Her only companions are the damaged ship AI, J.U.L.I.A, and the hulking exploration drone, MOBOT, sitting charging in the launch bay."
It seems that the story is the right thing to open with, here, because it is the selling point. From there you could continue your next couple of paragraphs about the story and then easily transition into the downfalls of the interactive gameplay, finishing up with your last paragraph staying where it is.
Basically, I'm suggesting moving paragraphs 2, 3, and the first part of 4 to the end of the review and replacing your self-admitted lackaluster introduction with your plot stuff.
That's just a thought.
I know there's a few grammar errors throughout, but it's late here so I didn't really try to catch them all. I did have a couple suggestions...
There is one line that's very confusing: "Though the eventual big reveal is gifted to you rather than discovered on your own merit, I found myself surprised at not really caring"
I thought you meant you didn't care about the plot. I think this is a really important line in the review, because what you are trying to say is that the plot is good enough to excuse even some of that same plot's delivery. I hope you fix this line to represent that more clearly.
Then, and I offer this to answer your opening line you might consider opening the review with this piece: "J.U.L.I.A plays out as a kind of sci-fi noir, having protagonist-of-sorts, astrobiologist Rachael Manners wake up in her deep-space probe’s cyro-chamber to find herself utterly alone and with no explanation as to where her entire crew has vanished to. Her only companions are the damaged ship AI, J.U.L.I.A, and the hulking exploration drone, MOBOT, sitting charging in the launch bay."
It seems that the story is the right thing to open with, here, because it is the selling point. From there you could continue your next couple of paragraphs about the story and then easily transition into the downfalls of the interactive gameplay, finishing up with your last paragraph staying where it is.
Basically, I'm suggesting moving paragraphs 2, 3, and the first part of 4 to the end of the review and replacing your self-admitted lackaluster introduction with your plot stuff.
That's just a thought.
Note to gamers: when someone shoots you in the face, they aren't "gay." They are "psychopathic."
