College

I am convinced that math is the source of all evil in this world.

Last week, you were sure it was me. The week before, ball point pens.

Everything is the source of all evil to you.

Evil has many different forms, my friend. It could just as well be all three.

Today I woke up and headed for my kitchen, which happened to be emitting menacing vibrations. I took the Apple Jacks from the top shelf and poured me a bowl. I really like Apple Jacks. Even though they make me cackle like an impish hellspawn, I can never get enough. They're evil, but I like it!

Later that day, I was sitting on my thrown, drinking evil margaritas and enjoying an epic game of Seperation Anxiety (my nefarious Genesis is plugged into my dastard bathroom!). Right then, I noticed an extra hint of evil in my pressence.

It was the form of a malevolent sausage sandwhich turned turd that was ramming through my ultra tight trap door. I couldn't take the sharp pain combined with the sinister grunts emitting from below, so I took a ballpoint pen and stabbed myself in the eye.

And then I died and went to hell since I everything is evil since heaven is nothing more than a giant sandbox populated by refried enchiladas and perfumed meat popsicles.

The End

.....that was wonderful...