31 reviews · showing 1–20
Reader NES HG exclusive
To say that The Legend of Zelda revolutionized gaming is like saying The Beatles revolutionized music; it's an understatement no matter how you slice it. Zelda stunned the world with its complex yet digestible game play and its hours upon…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
From the sharp minds of Compile come Zanac (1986/1987), a vertically scrolling shooter. Amidst a world of other games of the same genre, Zanac manages to outshine many of them, proving to be a strong contender with a unique challenge…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
The Nintendo Entertainment System is not regarded as having a plethora of quality shooters. This lack stems partially from technical difficulties: the NES just cannot handle the amount of action a good shooter requires. But the main reason…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
Whether or not the urban legends be true about Final Fantasy being aptly named for the future of Square, the fact was Square suddenly had a cash cow on their hands. And if there's anything 1980's Hollywood taught us, the best way to…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
It's only fair that a relatively obscure anime spawn a relatively obscure game. For the clueless, Golgo 13 is a Japanese comic book character who eventually starred in live-action and animated features. Duke Togo, the main character…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
Game production was much different during the days of the NES. Cartridges had to be bought and licensed from Nintendo, distribution was expensive because cartridges had to be manufactured long in advance, and translations were a much…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
You stand alone in strange forest, all area devoid of color except for the few trees and shrubs ahead. You set upon your quest to kill the irritating Lizard King who boggles his eyes at your kingdom. Hark, a gremlin-foe ahead! You charge…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Atari 2600 HG exclusive
Ah, Mystique, bless you. What would the Atari 2600 be without your games? As if there weren't enough bad titles, you had to introduce pixilated nudity into the mix. Without you, the Japanese wouldn't have the idea to copy, and Hentai games…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Atari 2600 HG exclusive
Certain types of games are just totally inappropriate for certain platforms. Would you want to play Resident Evil on your Texas Instruments calculator? How about Doom on your NES? On the same token the thought of a Double Dragon port for…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Arcade HG exclusive
When people think of terrible Castlevania games, the usual suspects are Castlevania: The Adventure for the GameBoy and Castlevania 64 for the Nintendo 64, but hidden deep in this mostly proud lineage is that drunken uncle who hasn't had a…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Arcade HG exclusive
Teenage guys are teeming with hormonal energy and are eager to experiment, but their female counterparts, overcome with hormones as well, just do not share guys' desire for quick-and-dirty sexual discovery. Being not the old days, boys…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader PC HG exclusive
The word solitaire is actually a generic term referring to an entire set of solitary playing card games, and, until recently, solitaire was known as patience. Those pesky Brits still call it patience because of their illogical resistance…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Genesis HG exclusive
''Hey, let's fight!'' is a challenge I issue to people while I am drunk. When sober ''Hey, let's fight!'' sounds as absurd as challenging someone ''Hey, let's play!'' or ''Hey, let's cuddle!'' And cuddling is the last thing I want to do…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Arcade HG exclusive
Wham! Arcades were a bit louder in the early 90's. It seemed every ten seconds you would hear a rather loud thud from a particular corner, and most likely that sound was generated by Taito's Sonic Blast Man, the epitome of physical…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader PC HG exclusive
In this world there are two types of people: those who adore Minesweeper and those who detest Minesweeper. There isn't a whole lot of middle ground. Like Solitaire, Minesweeper is an infamous time waster which is included in every version…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader PC HG exclusive
One of the alluring aspects of card games is the mystery due to the cards' unknown value when placed face down. This reduces most card games to games of chance; while skill is involved, the outcome is mostly due to what hand one is dealt…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader NES HG exclusive
Introduction Koei released Gemfire in 1991 for the NES, with SNES, Sega Genesis, and even DOS ports released soon afterward. Like other Koei titles, Gemfire is a turn based strategy game. Unlike Nobunaga's Ambition and Romance of the Three…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Famicom Disk System HG exclusive
Introduction With the solid foundation of the Final Fantasy series, Square gained so much hype and mind share that people forgot they were a company that also made terrible games. Akara Senki Raijin (1988) takes care of that by reminding…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Arcade HG exclusive
Introduction and History Tank saved the world from Pong; people tired of bouncing balls back and forth in just slightly different ways. Atari released plenty of games between Pong and Tank, but sales were poor because the games were no fun…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
Reader Arcade HG exclusive
Introduction and History Space Invaders took the world by storm in 1978 with its unprecedented popularity. Like Gun Fight before it, Space Invaders caused a coin shortage in Japan, except the shortage was so severe that supply was…
whelkman · May 26, 2008
