Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by whelkman and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Zelda II: The Adventure of Link review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 To say that The Legend of Zelda revolutionized gaming is like saying The Beatles revolutionized music; it's an understatement no matter how you slice it. Zelda stunned the world with its complex yet digestible game play and its hours upon hours of nonstop fun, and it introduced the world to a new type of game and a new type of blockbuster. After Zelda, video gaming was never the same.	4/5
	Zanac review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 From the sharp minds of Compile come Zanac (1986/1987), a vertically scrolling shooter. Amidst a world of other games of the same genre, Zanac manages to outshine many of them, proving to be a strong contender with a unique challenge system, great weapons controls, and excellent graphics and sound.	4/5
	Summer Carnival '92: Recca review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 The Nintendo Entertainment System is not regarded as having a plethora of quality shooters. This lack stems partially from technical difficulties: the NES just cannot handle the amount of action a good shooter requires. But the main reason is game makers just did not concentrate enough resources to produce a truly great title, choosing instead to manufacture platformers and the like. Through all this, Naxatsoft manages to bring us Recca, an almost unheard of title released in 1992, deep into the...	4/5
	Final Fantasy II review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Whether or not the urban legends be true about Final Fantasy being aptly named for the future of Square, the fact was Square suddenly had a cash cow on their hands. And if there's anything 1980's Hollywood taught us, the best way to capitalize on fame is to quickly scratch out a sequel. Unfortunately, Square may have scratched this one out too quickly.	4/5
	Golgo 13: Top Secret Episode review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 It's only fair that a relatively obscure anime spawn a relatively obscure game. For the clueless, Golgo 13 is a Japanese comic book character who eventually starred in live-action and animated features. Duke Togo, the main character, generally going by his codename Golgo 13, is an assassin for hire. He only takes the most difficult and ''impossible'' missions. His sniping skill is unmatched by any in the world, so his handiwork comes at a high premium. Vic Tokai's Golgo 13: Top Secret Episode (1...	3/5
	Radia Senki: Reimei Hen review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Game production was much different during the days of the NES. Cartridges had to be bought and licensed from Nintendo, distribution was expensive because cartridges had to be manufactured long in advance, and translations were a much bigger proportion of the total cost. Essentially, every release was a huge risk. Add to this Nintendo of America's rule that each company could release only five games per year. The conglomeration of these situations caused third party companies to release only the ...	4.5/5
	Bokosuka Wars review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 You stand alone in strange forest, all area devoid of color except for the few trees and shrubs ahead. You set upon your quest to kill the irritating Lizard King who boggles his eyes at your kingdom. Hark, a gremlin-foe ahead! You charge the weak-looking beast and clash swords. The gremlin quickly fells you. You are dead. In hell, a giant Lizard King chases you around with his pennant and walking cane chanting, ''WOW! YOU LOSE!''	0.5/5
	Beat 'Em & Eat 'Em review (A2600) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Ah, Mystique, bless you. What would the Atari 2600 be without your games? As if there weren't enough bad titles, you had to introduce pixilated nudity into the mix. Without you, the Japanese wouldn't have the idea to copy, and Hentai games would be long delayed!	1/5
	Double Dragon review (A2600) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Certain types of games are just totally inappropriate for certain platforms. Would you want to play Resident Evil on your Texas Instruments calculator? How about Doom on your NES? On the same token the thought of a Double Dragon port for the Atari 2600 is just plain bizarre. Double Dragon was a state of the art 1987 arcade game with three action buttons. The Atari 2600 was a dated and decaying console from 1977 with a single action button. Clearly there were going to be some porting problems. &#...	1/5
	Haunted Castle review (ARC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 When people think of terrible Castlevania games, the usual suspects are Castlevania: The Adventure for the GameBoy and Castlevania 64 for the Nintendo 64, but hidden deep in this mostly proud lineage is that drunken uncle who hasn't had a job in thirty years and shows up to family parties only to wreck them. Unlike Vs. Castlevania, which was just a minor tweak of the NES version, Konami's Haunted Castle is a completely original entry into the arcade, which, fortunately, has never turned up elsew...	2/5
	Gals Panic review (ARC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Teenage guys are teeming with hormonal energy and are eager to experiment, but their female counterparts, overcome with hormones as well, just do not share guys' desire for quick-and-dirty sexual discovery. Being not the old days, boys cannot simply clunk a woman on the noggin with a heavy object when she resists his charms (or lack thereof).	0.5/5
	Solitaire review (PC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 The word solitaire is actually a generic term referring to an entire set of solitary playing card games, and, until recently, solitaire was known as patience. Those pesky Brits still call it patience because of their illogical resistance to the superior American method of doing things. Microsoft's choice for their stock game is Klondike, which is the most known solitaire game. Klondike is an ideal beginner's solitaire with its simple rules and ubiquity.	2/5
	Ka-Ge-Ki: Fists of Steel review (GEN) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 ''Hey, let's fight!'' is a challenge I issue to people while I am drunk. When sober ''Hey, let's fight!'' sounds as absurd as challenging someone ''Hey, let's play!'' or ''Hey, let's cuddle!'' And cuddling is the last thing I want to do when thinking of Ka Ge Ki's ilk. Ka Ge Ki: Fists of Steel by Sage's Creation is a poorly designed one-on-one brawler set in a world where everybody has illogically large heads and four inch legs. They also taunt you (or you taunt them; I can't tell) by constantly...	1.5/5
	Sonic Blast Man review (ARC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Wham! Arcades were a bit louder in the early 90's. It seemed every ten seconds you would hear a rather loud thud from a particular corner, and most likely that sound was generated by Taito's Sonic Blast Man, the epitome of physical strength based games.	4/5
	Minesweeper review (PC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 In this world there are two types of people: those who adore Minesweeper and those who detest Minesweeper. There isn't a whole lot of middle ground. Like Solitaire, Minesweeper is an infamous time waster which is included in every version of Microsoft Windows since its inception in the early 1980s. True to its name, Minesweeper simulates a hunt for mines, but, instead of a metal detector, you are armed with numeric hints as to where the mines are located in a manner somewhat similar to Battleshi...	1.5/5
	FreeCell review (PC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 One of the alluring aspects of card games is the mystery due to the cards' unknown value when placed face down. This reduces most card games to games of chance; while skill is involved, the outcome is mostly due to what hand one is dealt. However, Microsoft's FreeCell's is based on a bold premise: all the cards are face up.	4.5/5
	Gemfire review (NES) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Introduction	4.5/5
	Akara Senki Raijin review (FDS) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Introduction	1.5/5
	Tank review (ARC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Introduction and History	4/5
	Space Invaders review (ARC) Reviewed on May 26, 2008 Introduction and History	3/5

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