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Staff review by Zigfried
January 24, 2010
Bayonetta is not the first witch to appear in a video game, but she stands out from the rest. With her devil-may-care attitude, sexy British accent, family-unfriendly penchant for near nudity, twin shotguns strapped to her feet, and secret hidden chainsaw, Bayonetta is an unpredictable and enthralling vessel for PlatinumGames' outrageous creativity. She shoots gabby angels in the forehead to shut them up. Her clothing -- formed from her long long hair -- unravels and takes the shape of demonic entities to swallow foes whole. Bayonetta even breakdances, releasing volleys of artillery with each spin.
This nimble and unusual character perfectly matches the fast-paced, responsive combat. Bayonetta features a blend of third-person melee and gunplay similar to Devil May Cry; sword slices are followed by pistol shots, although you're free to personalize your fighting style by attaching different weapons to each appendage. If you don't care for the sword-and-pistol combination, then use the whip to toss angels into the air, and blow them away with the Kilgore cannon! All sixteen levels are divided into several enclosed arenas, similar to Chaos Legion, with a medal awarded at each checkpoint based on combat speed and performance. Mere survival isn't particularly difficult, but earning one of the coveted "pure platinum" awards requires effort. Achieving a platinum rank across an entire level requires absolute mastery of Bayonetta's many combination attacks. This game is as challenging as players choose to make it.
The action's all strung together with an intentionally stupid story that could have easily been cut entirely, but then we'd miss out on amazing scenes like Bayonetta surfing atop a fallen angel's body across a gushing wave of lava.
Bayonetta clearly revels in silliness. Upon encountering female angels who represent the concept of Joy, a techno version of "Fly Me to the Moon" plays. Fans of Frank Sinatra will recognize the song; fans of Neon Genesis Evangelion will chuckle at the sly reference. As Bayonetta whips the joyous angels or fires shotgun blasts into their faces, her magic meter fills up. Once full, she can unleash a torture attack . . . in this case, Bayonetta ties the lady angels to a wooden horse until they orgasm and explode, releasing a cloud of Sonic the Hedgehog rings. It's supernatural snuff, but you're supposed to laugh at it instead of being disgusted.
Whether due to such scenes, foul language, sexual overtones, or its anti-Catholic subtext, Bayonetta will briefly offend most players at some point. Naysayers have been quick to leap on such elements (no doubt to protect the children who shouldn't be playing M-rated games), but Bayonetta isn't really "about" any of those things even though it includes all of them. Instead of lingering on any particular point, Bayonetta leaps from one crazy scene to the next without establishing any meaningful message; the clever -- and satisfyingly non-cliffhanger -- finale makes it clear that Bayonetta's ultimate message is:
"HEY, WHY SO SERIOUS? LET'S HAVE FUN, BABY!"
This is not an epic, a legend, or a sweeping adventure; Bayonetta is a game. More than that, it's a Sega game, and the developers pay homage to past classics in a number of ways. First and foremost, Bayonetta delivers a magical sound shower of Sega goodness; snippets from Zillion's theme song occasionally play before the Angel Attack shooting mini-game, and the Highway 666 level is accompanied by After Burner's adrenaline-pumping music. Although the Bayonetta version is instrumental, here are lyrics from the vocal version for karaoke fans who want to sing along:
When we touch I want you so much my heart is on fire
Make it so I can't let go, you're all I desiiiiiire
Burning Love! After Burner! Burning Love!
After Burner! After your burnin' love!
Bayonetta can also perform Akira's coolest move (the body thrust he shows off in the Virtua Fighter 2 demo), shoot things with upgraded versions of the Zillion guns, and speed through an entire level of Space Harrier, as recreated with Bayonetta graphics. Fans of Clover Studio will also recognize some choice moments. Whether you loved OutRun, God Hand, Okami, or even SDI, spotting all the various references is a game in and of itself.
I don't know what Platinum intended to achieve by including these moments, but I know what they did achieve. They made me feel young again . . . and they did it in a "next-gen" way without making any concessions against Bayonetta's own identity. Despite all these nods to other games, nothing feels internally inconsistent; then again, it's hard for anything to feel out of place when the heroine rides atop ICBM missiles while flinging magical bolts at golden bats with human faces.
Swift action, sly references, sweet music, and a seductive lead who proves females can be just as daring as Dante -- Bayonetta kills angels for bloody sport, and playing Bayonetta leaves me feeling more jacked than Bolo. This game is such a breath of fresh air that minor inconveniences such as the camera, loading times, and occasional screen-tearing are easily ignored. My heart is on fire!
//Zig
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