I have an announcement to make.
August 13, 2007

As you all may (or may not, more likely) know, I started writing reviews exclusively for Honest Gamers in February of this current year. While I can't claim that any of them are a claim to internet fame, I feel confident to exclaim the love that I felt while writing them.

Now that they're published here on the internet, it's as though I have another effigy for my eventual resume. Whether or not you've appreciated the work I've put into bringing the truth to those who are looking for an honest opinion, it remains that I have indeed put much work into each piece.

Now that I'm in the running of the TT for the first time, a welling depression has begun to arise from someplace deep within. This feeling knows no stopping; I've tried all that I can think of, but it boils down to a single, root problem.

This pain that kills me, I've identified it. Yes, I know it well.

That is why I announce, that I must beat Espiga. I must! And if I cannot, in fact, beat Espiga off the face of this game board. . .

Well, I've come to terms with the heavy weight of a possible loss. And I've decided that, if I lose, I will retire.

From masturbating.

CRUSH

Most recent blog posts from Donovan Chee...

Feedback
Suskie Suskie - August 13, 2007 (10:26 PM)
I was about to complain that these blogs have been getting way too preachy lately, and then... yeah.

Still, good luck with... all that.
Genj Genj - August 13, 2007 (10:31 PM)
No man can retire from masturbating.
carcinogen_crush carcinogen_crush - August 13, 2007 (10:37 PM)
Nonsense! If you can give up writing reviews, you can give up masturbation!

Wait. . .

Where have a I heard that before. . .

Still, glad to see my attempt at satire go straight out the window.
Felix_Arabia Felix_Arabia - August 13, 2007 (10:40 PM)
The caption for TEAM SALAD SHOOTERS should read:

"Not a single shred of sanity was found betwixt their loins."
pup pup - August 14, 2007 (08:17 AM)
You're the bravest man I ever met.
espiga espiga - August 14, 2007 (04:41 PM)
Let's kill two birds with one stone and settle it with a game of Stroker.

Better yet, let's not.
carcinogen_crush carcinogen_crush - August 14, 2007 (06:35 PM)
Stroker is out!

Instead, we will REVIEW DUEL and it will be better!!!

Odds are though, I'm gonna end up needing a girlfriend real soon here. But the important thing is to never give up, and never surrender!

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