About Me: Flobknocker is the nonsensical nom-de-plume of a British guy who occasionally writes about videogames, and who belongs to a mysterious cult that all gather round a helmet every weekend to perform rituals in the hope of bringing about a new Motorstorm game.

I think it's time we gave it up for that little yellow logo

If you’ll permit me to ramble a bit, I’d like to talk about a particular dumb bit of videogames that consistently makes me grin. No, not bullet time - dumber. I’m talking about that little orange saw logo that sometimes pops up at the start of your games. Yeah folks, this is a whole rave about how the Havok physics logo makes me excited.

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I like pinball. I'd like to talk about pinball for a bit.

Okay, hear me out... there might be a pinball-shaped hole in your life.

Why might somebody want to play pinball, you ask? Particularly, in an age when you can pick just about any current platform you like, and experience rich, deep stories, frenetic action, and graphics that make real life look boring? Well, it’s my firm belief that while folks are never wholly one or the other, people who play videogames tend to fall into one of two camps: story players, and gameplay-ers.

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Don't F3AR the reaper

As a general rule, I write about games that have a profound effect on me. That profound effect does not necessarily have to be positive, nor is it exclusively negative. Sometimes, a game might just get under my skin for wholly unique reasons, or because it offers something I've not experienced before. In this case, FEAR 3 (or F3AR, as it insists I call it) has the unique trait of being the videogame equivalent of a pot noodle.

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There's something rotten in the state of occupied Denmark.

What's this? I'm reviewing a game in a somewhat timely fashion? I know. Shocking.

I've been a fan of the Battlefield series since its unfortunately janktacular debut on PS2, and so, with Battlefield 5 now out in the wild, I feel it's time I finally wrote something about one of my favourite series. Unfortunately, though, I fear all may not be well.

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