Super C (NES) review
"In an age when gaming is grappling against its own impending emasculation, the few, stoic Splinter Cells and Dead to Rightses will only stand for so long. For these brave soldiers of a hopeless war will only be able to support this faltering fortress until their backs have broken. And when the flamboyant Final Fantasies and eccentric Pokemons have finally stolen the breath of these last survivors, the men of our hobby will look back to a better time. "
In an age when gaming is grappling against its own impending emasculation, the few, stoic Splinter Cells and Dead to Rightses will only stand for so long. For these brave soldiers of a hopeless war will only be able to support this faltering fortress until their backs have broken. And when the flamboyant Final Fantasies and eccentric Pokemons have finally stolen the breath of these last survivors, the men of our hobby will look back to a better time.
They'll look back to the masculine, testosterone-juiced murder-fests like Super C.
Super C puts you (and your optional friend) before a guantlet of alien resistance which would make any of Square's androgynous protagonists beg for a quick death. The level-by-level assault of endless enemies and relentless fire would bring tears to the eyes of a more feminine ''Tidus'' or ''Squall.'' Fortunately, you control Mad Dog and Scorpion.
Assuming control of one of these shirtless badasses, you must fight your way across 6 sidescrolling and 2 overhead levels, each pouring down alien soldiers from a limitless reserve. They swarm from the sides, above, and from doors and holes in the scenery. They rush you in the water and snipe you from above. From the military installation of the first level, to the rising elevator in the fourth level's hangar, to the ''Poison Palace'' of the final level containing the repulsive Jagger Froid himself, the enemy never hesitates, never lets up, never stops its relentless rush.
Fortunately, you're equipped for the task. You'll jump at the chance to ditch your competent but stale standard-issue rifle for the more impressive upgrades the game offers. For the man-of-heavy arms, there's the Machinegun. For the lazy-of-aim, there's the screen-scouring Spread. For the tasteless, there's the worthless Lazer. For the skilled, heavy-hanging Rambo, there's the demolishing Flamethrower. All but the Lazer is an excellent and virile method of destroying the enemy.
In fact, Super C's only real weakness is the ease with which its final bosses go down. After slaughtering interminable amounts of alien opposition... after showering soldiers, larvae, arachnids, turrets and mechs with flame rounds and machinegun shells, across jungles, up mountains, and inside gigantic monsters, you'll find that your own masculine offensive will be enough to dispose of the bosses without enough resistance.
But don't get wrapped up in these few, easier boss encounters. Super C's fluid blend of lion-hearted gunplay and flawless mechanics make it easily one of the best action games ever conceived. In a time when such brash charm becomes increasingly scarce, a mannish monolith such as this demands to be honored.
Community review by sinner (May 14, 2004)
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