No-one's unbeatable.

Cashews are really good.

Am I expected to throw a hissy fit here?

No, Suskie, you may not throw a hissy fit here. I refer you to the previously-created "blog post for Suskie to have a hissy fit in" immediately below this one.

Any attempt by you to throw a hissy fit here can and will lead to much pretentious posturing and declarations of superiority. You have been warned.

*O Fortuna from Carl Orff's Carmina Burana ominously plays in the background*

Understood. I will use utmost restraint.

At a glance, it looked like you said that you were going to urinate on something.

Macadamia nuts are better.

but felix_arabia nuts are the best of all.

How do you know, Blu?

You know I can't tell if you're being smarmy(I threw that in just for you) or cruel. I'm not sure if I should be insulted or flattered.

You Brits and your weird humor.

Here. Something to make you feel at home.

It's this whole self-mocking/general mocking thing that we Brits do. Arrogance is mightily unbecoming, so we bond, humour-wise, through belittling ourselves and those around us in a deadpan manner. It isn't intended to cause upset or anything of the sort - it would step over the line from amusing self-depreciation to something really rather nasty if it did. It's intended not to mock, but rather to parody others in a way that is meant to provide a source of humour to that person.

Basically, it's a kind of "lighten up" thing - the verbal equivalent of tea-making. If I was being cruel I'd have been distinctly nastier about the whole thing. As it stands, I'm merely trying to share humour and provide amusement, including to you. Please accept my apologies if you didn't appreciate it.

Besides, I really really like cashew nuts. >_>

See? All these years you thought I was being a bastard, I was simply misunderstood.

I feel a group hug coming along and that's all very Oprah, so why not do it the British way and kick the living shit out of each other on the rugby pitch?

No, I knew you were kidding. That's why I'm not slinging insults and challenging you to a death match. Or chasing you... with kittens?

Still wondering about that one.

I'm a Yorkshire woman. If you challenged me to a death match, I'd probably win.

How do you know, Blu?

intuition.

I'm a Yorkshire woman. If you challenged me to a death match, I'd probably win.

That's like Algebra or the term "sentence structure". I have no idea what it means.

it means she's bulked out like Arnold Schwarzenotevengonnatry.

Nah. It just means I can crack nuts of ALL kinds at 50 paces with a single glare. Or something.

watch out or you'll get true's S&M sensors beeping again.

There's nothing wrong with a bit of quality bondage, you know.

Damn straight.

I know that this is going to make me look like a complete idiot, but it's a joke that has to be made...

You spelled censors wrong, you moron!

You spelled censors wrong, you moron!

This is a very funny sentence, but not when you're trying to be funny with it.

it fits, because true is a very funny man, but not when he's trying to be funny.

Well, I guess Lisanne's proven that:

1 British Girl + Cashews =

Much more popular than:

1 Oregonian Guy + Masturbation.

Hope you're happy.