Operation: Vietnam (DS) review "Attention, Soldier! "

Attention, Soldier!

We have a mission for you. We’re not altogether sure what this mission will involve as of yet, but we’re giving it the code-name Operation: Vietnam.

We know you’re probably keen to know why we’re sending four of you on a special mission. Well, it’s so top secret that we’ll wait until you’re actually there to fill you in on the details. For now we recommend that you familiarise yourself with previous operations such as Commando and Cannon Fodder. This should provide an insight into the demands of this particular mission.

We expect this to be a very dangerous mission, so you’d best ensure that you’re fully prepared for every eventuality. You’ve already completed basic training, so your trigger finger should be in working order -- no signs of arthritis, I trust. We’ve equipped you with basic GPS technology and provided plenty of ammunition, so fire-power shouldn’t be a problem. Remember to brush up on your war-related quips, though. You know the drill… I love the smell of bacon in the morning; all your Viet Cong bases are belong to us. We love that sort of stuff. It builds morale, and you’ll need to keep your chin up.

The jungle is hostile territory and you’ll be flying over an area that is known to contain a high concentration of Viet Cong troops. For this reason we anticipate that your plane will crash. I know, I know… this is somewhat alarming. But we have to be honest with you because our planes do tend to crash an awful lot. You can consider that your mission if you like: escape from the Viet Cong. And save some hostages. There, that should do it.

Now, we’ve selected the four of you for important reasons. As this is a special mission we’ve elected to send four specialists, and each of you has excelled in your individual field. Soldier #1 is a heavy weapons expert -- slow and sluggish, but armed with enough firepower to bring the jungle down in flames. Soldier #2 is armed with a sniper rifle, so if the element of surprise is required then he’s your man. Soldier #3 is armed with a machine-gun. This makes him the all-round hero, as you’ll tell from the bright blue bandana he’ll be wearing. Remember, nothing says ‘heroism’ like a complete disregard for protective headwear! Oh, and Soldier #4 is going to be carrying medical supplies, and, as such, he’ll be fairly useless. Apologies, Soldier #4.

We’re reluctant to elect a leader, considering that you’ll most likely lose contact with each other at various points during the mission. The Viet Cong have shown a nasty taste for kidnapping, you see. Leadership will therefore pass between the four of you depending on the circumstances.

Oh, one other thing… it’s our intention to trial a daring new strategy for Operation: Vietnam. We’re going to forbid you from running. We think that you’re less likely to stumble into trouble, be it from Viet Cong ambushes or hidden mine-fields, if you move through the jungle at the slowest possible pace. This means that your journey will be long and monotonous, and that you’ll have to turn and walk away at the first sign of trouble, but that’s just the way it has to be. Should a soldier fall during combat you’ll need to scour the jungle for medical supplies before walking all the way back and administering them. Leaving an ally behind is not an option, but neither is running. If you can’t make it back to the injured solider in time then you’ll just have to let him die. We want this strategy to work. Remember that. No running. At all. Ever. That’s an order.

Operation: Vietnam is going to be a tough mission. We can’t hide that fact from you. The Viet Cong are far more familiar with the terrain than you will be, which means you should almost certainly expect to encounter trouble. When you come under enemy fire don’t, whatever you do, lose focus and panic. Always remember your directives: walk carefully away from the bullets and regroup before progressing slowly and cautiously. This may all sound slightly ridiculous, but we assure you that it’s the only way. This will be a war of attrition, and therefore haste is strictly forbidden.

By the time you reach the war-torn streets of Hue City -- if indeed you make it that far -- we expect you to be thoroughly fed up. This is why we have chosen you. Operation: Vietnam is going to require patience and persistence, for the jungle is a dangerous location. If you don’t act with caution then you’ll be forced to retreat a fair distance and surrender all of your hard-fought progress. Re-advancing though territory that you’ve already fought over is not an experience you’ll want to remember. The jungle is also very plain and unremarkable, so be careful not to wander into hostile village settlements or get bogged down in rice-fields. The disorientating uniformity of this terrain makes navigating by landmarks almost impossible, hence the need for basic GPS technology. For this reason tedium will often be your most deadly enemy.

We have chosen you because we believe that you can cope with this. If you feel that you’ll be unable to handle the gruelling monotony of the jungle or think that you’ll be unable to obey our strict orders then please, speak up now.

If you accept your mission then we wish you good luck. You’ll need it.

GENERAL MAJESCO.

Featured community review by JANUS2 (October 03, 2008) A bio for this contributor is currently unavailable, but check back soon to see if that changes. If you are the author of this review, you can update your bio from the Settings page.