The Guy Game (PlayStation 2) review
"The idea behind “The Guy Game” is similar to playing Trivial Pursuit in a strip club. However, actually playing this horrendous mass of immorality could be compared to stapling your eyelids to a jet plane: there’s absolutely no reason you should want to do it. Nudity or not, this is one game that should keep its top on. "
The idea behind “The Guy Game” is similar to playing Trivial Pursuit in a strip club. However, actually playing this horrendous mass of immorality could be compared to stapling your eyelids to a jet plane: there’s absolutely no reason you should want to do it. Nudity or not, this is one game that should keep its top on.
Yes there is nudity and far as I know it is the first PS2 game to have it. The bare-chested girls are Topheavy’s only leverage here because if they boasted about quality game play or dazzling design I could sue them for false advertisement. There is nothing in the way of entertainment value here, aside from what “Girls Gone Wild” could provide.
The whole structure of the game is annoyingly simple. If it’s two or more players you start out by choosing a favorite girl and then a high card. Whoever chooses the best card is awarded the most points, thus claiming the title “President”. It goes down from there, but the person with the least points gets a not so redeeming name. The screen cuts to the players, where they are posed a question with four possible choices, each corresponding to a different button on the controller. If you guess the answer correctly you get points, you answer wrong and you lose them. It’s kind of like dirty jeopardy. After that a short video is played depicting the obnoxious host asking a spring break attendee the same question. In round one you get the choice of picking if they got it wrong or right and in round three you have to guess what their answer is, seeing as they always get it wrong. If you guessed correctly, everyone gets bonus points. Again you find yourself watching another cut-scene to determine if you chose properly. If they answer wrong though, they’re forced to take off their top. Don’t get too excited because it’s censored—twice. The first time it’s a horrible product placement with a bar over the girl that says “The Guy Game” as if you don’t already know what you’re playing. The second time it’s the typical blur you usually see on cops.
This is where those bonus points come into play. It adds to your “squish-o-meter”, the higher it gets the less obstruction you have. If reach the red zone all the bars and blurs disappear, finally granting you what you’re playing this game for in the first place: Nudity. The sad thing is by the time you earn enough points for this the game is practically over. You may get one or two uncensored videos and you can play through the round again with the meter gone, but who would want too? The final round—if you make it—is called “The hottie challenge”. This pits all three girls against each other in a degrading fashion by making them hoola hoop or jump rope topless. Basically, you bet your existing points on a winner and watch to see if you were right. Remember that girl you chose at the beginning? Well if you managed to stay or become president you get a short hokey video of her dancing around.
Everything about this game is Cro-Magnon. Aside from the videos, the graphics are something I could have seen playing Nintendo’s’ pictionary. I honestly feel like I’m playing an 8-bit machine over here. The sound is beyond repair. Every time a new question comes up a girl comes on to tell you such in a flirty way, but after two rounds I would rather listen to Fran Drescher. There is no music to speak of and each time you answer a question the beep is so annoying it makes an air raid siren sound like a harp. The commentators would be a lot better off if they were paid to stay quiet and one look at the cover and you can see everything the host doesn’t have going for him. Though you can't blame Topheavy for trying, complete losers surrounded by gorgeous woman worked for Hee Haw. Fun factor? Was high school fun? No, but I graduated just so I wouldn’t have to answer stupid questions anymore. Every gimmick this game portrays as “stretching the envelope of tolerable material” is tawdry. The squish-o-meter, the mini-games and the dirty comments are pushed so blatantly beyond risqué it’s irritating. Even the girls aren’t that much of a joy, as most of them look like they fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.
This game is pointless, redundant and annoying. Don’t get me wrong; I’m a fan of women in general. I just don’t see the point in paying fifty dollars and pushing through irritating quizzes just to see something you can order off TV for ten bucks. This is not a game but a classless attempt to push video games into genre they shouldn’t be in the first place. “The Guy Game” is some futile attempt to tread new ground, but it only ends up tripping over its own feet and landing face first in the dirt.
Community review by True (May 06, 2005)
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