Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by Jason Venter and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Chain: The Lost Footprints review (PC) Reviewed on July 15, 2009 Chain: The Lost Footprints tries to offer a different sort of hentai experience. You've only been playing for a few minutes and already you've made two choices. Options don't typically come at the player so frequently in a genre known more for its one-handed play style. For that reason alone, the game initially feels different from the majority of its peers. Finally, you're an active participant instead of a voyeur. Will it continue to hold your interest, though?	2.5/5
	Dawn of Discovery review (WII) Reviewed on July 12, 2009 Another feature that sets Dawn of Discovery apart from other simulation titles such as Civilization IV or SimCity is the occasional focus on maritime exploration. Instead of settling a single continent, you'll develop a bunch of smaller islands. This actually provides a unique dynamic, since you frequently come up against space constraints and also have to consider different fertility levels. For example, you might first land on an island where grain grows particularly well, but as your colony evolves from a simple fishing village into a city center, the people who live there will start craving hot spices, fashionable clothing and so forth.	4/5
	Droplitz review (X360) Reviewed on July 09, 2009 Even on the introductory levels, water drains too quickly from too many locations. It's easy to build up a solid chain of beautiful paths, only to watch it disappear in a flash as you're left scrambling to construct new paths while a steady stream of liquid trickles down through what formerly was a beautiful labyrinth but now is a complete mess. The obvious solution is to chain together new paths more quickly than they can disappear (an effort that has the added benefit of boosting your all-important score while also buying you precious seconds with which to plot your next move), but there's seldom sufficient time.	3/5
	Overlord II review (PS3) Reviewed on July 05, 2009 Pastoral scenes and even the menacing fairytale forest are gone, replaced by environs that seem to have been drawn with no discernible rhyme or reason from a hat labeled "whatever was left." The icy village that you once called your home is improbably bordered by a tiny cave that leads almost immediately to a lush forest populated by elves who preach peace and love for all creatures. In effeminate voices they protest your vile actions (which literally include sending your minions forth to club baby seals) as you break apart pots and vases and swing the camera around wildly in an effort to see through thick foliage presented as an assortment of paper-thin textures.	2.5/5
	Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood review (PS3) Reviewed on July 04, 2009 It can be a bit much to take in all at once, but Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood delights in telling its twisted tale in an unconventional and sometimes surprising fashion. The next likely event is seldom clear as the player careens wildly from one volatile shootout to another, never far from disaster and a few profanity-laced one-liners. You might not always understand what just happened, but that's okay; the only details you really have to keep in mind to stay on top of things is that you're one of two treasure-seeking brothers and that your job is to shoot the crap out of anything that moves.	4/5
	The Legendary Starfy review (DS) Reviewed on June 27, 2009 In case you're not satisfied with a diet of constant platforming and a steady trickle of new abilities, there are a variety of diversions along the way. For example, one stage finds Starfy rolled into a snowball. He'll barrel downhill and you have to move and jump—in the limited fashion available—to avoid falling into fatal gaps. Another break from the norm comes in the form of a series of mine cart rides where you can flip switches to raise the water level (good if you want to leap the widest chasms) while avoiding destructive bits of the landscape. Thanks to solid level design and a variety of neat puzzles, such moments aren't strictly necessary to keep the game engaging.	4.5/5
	Mad Dog McCree Gunslinger Pack review (WII) Reviewed on June 26, 2009 You'll quickly come to learn that timing is everything, which isn't so bad, but there's an unwelcome complication: the exact timing required is never quite clear. You have to aim and shoot before a certain point in any video footage. If you shoot too soon, though, nothing can happen except wasted bullets because the available video isn't ready to produce video of an enemy dying at that point in time. If you shoot too late, you might fire five or six rounds and then be shot anyway because you passed some arbitrary point where the directors weren't ready for you to succeed.	1.5/5
	Cross Edge review (PS3) Reviewed on June 13, 2009 Because of the haphazard manner in which information is presented, genre-standard processes such as item crafting, synthesis, skill point allotment, shopping, party formation and so forth all require that you dive through two or three screens. Even then, it can be difficult if you've accomplished what you meant to accomplish. Whether you're trying to guess at who can equip an item or merely trying to assign characters to your current rotation, prepare for frustration. There's no escaping the nightmare.	1.5/5
	Fuel review (PS3) Reviewed on June 12, 2009 Though on the surface the game appears to be just another tour of some established courses where your only goal is to finish ahead of all of your competition, that's not actually the best way to play. Instead, you're expected to chart your own routes while adhering to actual roads only to the extent that is required to pass through the checkpoints. Everything else is up to you. The freedom that this dynamic provides is cool at first. When you come to the first bend in the path and most of the other drivers ease gradually around it and toward the left, you'll probably love continuing straight ahead and launching over a ramp to shave a second off your time. Performing similar feats of daring on the next few bends is similarly great. Then you hit a tree and the cursing starts.	2/5
	Up review (X360) Reviewed on June 11, 2009 Fortunately, cooperative play alleviates some of that. Two people can pick up controllers and it's easy to join or leave a game with the press of a button. That allows a parent or elder sibling to save the day if kids are becoming too frustrated. It's a great way for a parent to connect with his or her game-loving offspring without having to spend forever figuring out how things work. It also means that the game could become the perfect choice for a few hours of fun when new visitors enter your humble abode.	3/5
	Terminator Salvation review (PS3) Reviewed on June 03, 2009 At first, such encounters are thrilling because you don't know what's going on and it's easy to die. Any battle is epic. Then you learn how to utilize cover and you discover that you can basically just draw fire from behind a barrier while your allies shoot everyone from behind. That strategy works most of the time and when it doesn't, that only means that the roles have reversed. You're never required to do anything more mentally challenging than sneak and shoot.	2/5
	Punch-Out!! review (WII) Reviewed on May 24, 2009 I always enjoyed the portraits and the clever little sayings that opponents offered in the NES installment, but such elements could only go so far. Movements in the actual ring were likewise limited by hardware. This time around, things are much more convincing throughout. King Hippo laughs arrogantly as he faces you, as if insulted that such a puny challenger would dare to face him. Upon finding himself lying on the mat, Soda Popinski will resort to swigging liquid from a bottle before rising to his feet in a rage.	4.5/5
	ZEN Pinball review (PS3) Reviewed on May 24, 2009 The problem I encountered is that the "quick" matches are often too intimidating for inexperienced players. They amount to a score race, with every competitor playing simultaneously and trying to hit 5,000,000 (or some much higher number) before his worthy opponents. However, there are often penalties in place that take away as much as half of any score amassed. It's easy to quickly fall into a pattern where you have somewhere around 3,000,000 total points, gain around 300,000 on a new attempt, then lose 10% of your total and fall right back to where you were... again and again and again. Unless you're joined by someone more proficient, matches can last an eternity.	3.5/5
	Dokapon Journey review (DS) Reviewed on May 19, 2009 Perhaps the most disappointing difference this time around is that winning against your rivals is no longer an opportunity to serve a huge dish of delicious humiliation. One of the best things about Dokapon Kingdom was the number of ways in which you could poke fun at a rival after besting him in battle. Here, things seem more straight-forward. You can still rob a liberated town or steal a purse full of gold, but that's not as exciting as—and you'll pardon me, I hope, if this sounds juvenile—giving someone a poo-shaped hairstyle.	3.5/5
	Excitebots: Trick Racing review (WII) Reviewed on May 12, 2009 Each time you manage a long power slide, you could earn anywhere from one to five stars. Launching into the air and staying there for a lengthy period of time also yields a similar reward, as does weaving between perilous stands of trees or even crashing spectacularly. There's a substantial bonus if you cross the finish line first, but the person who wins is ultimately the one who bags the most stars.	4/5
	Dragon Quest V: Hand of the Heavenly Bride review (DS) Reviewed on May 10, 2009 Narrative strength is one of two important elements that make Dragon Quest V such an adventure. Monster recruitment is the other. As you wander the land, you'll defeat all manner of beasts that should be familiar to those who have been enjoying the franchise from the beginning. Sometimes, you'll have the opportunity to add those creatures to your army. They'll fight by your side, whether you choose a feisty little brownie or a healer or even a fierce golem. Much of the game is spent with only a few human companions available—as dictated by the furiously twisting plot—so your path to success requires that you cultivate working relationships with monsters.	4.5/5
	Plants vs. Zombies review (PC) Reviewed on May 05, 2009 The addictive nature of Plants vs. Zombies comes as a bit of a surprise given the generally repetitive nature of its design. There are several available modes of play that switch things up with varying degrees of success, but they almost all come down to the same basic task: keep your brains in your cranium! Even the generous assortment of zombies that you'll face and the extensive cache of weapons at your disposal wind up feeling limited after awhile, but there's a good chance that you won't even care.	5/5
	I'm Gonna Nurse You - Voice Plus!- review (PC) Reviewed on April 27, 2009 Though each leading lady to a certain extent has her own personality, they mostly share an obsession for your penis and will request regularly that you prove your love for them with your genitals. Similarly, the moment when you first do the deed doesn't ever feel right. One minute you're chatting it up and the next you're swapping spit and falling onto the nearest surface for a quickie while your partner professes embarrassment but wiggles her body so you can penetrate deeper. Whether she's wearing a nurse's habit (the fetish this game is most clearly meant to satisfy) or a nun's habit (an odd inclusion, but one that works), your woman of choice behaves the same.	2.5/5
	PopCap Arcade Vol 2 review (X360) Reviewed on April 22, 2009 Packed with three games typical of PopCap's output over the last year or so, the compilation brings brings something to the table that should appeal to just about everyone. For those who are just jumping into the whole casual gaming thing, for those who haven't taken their Xbox 360 consoles online and even for your grandmother or little sister who has barely touched her Xbox 360 Elite since you bought it for her this past holiday, the time to sit up and take notice has officially arrived.	4/5
	Wanted: Weapons of Fate review (PS3) Reviewed on April 19, 2009 Wanted: Weapons of Fate falls quite comfortably into the third-person shooter mold. You can run up to someone and gut him with a squishy-sounding thrust of your knife to his stomach or throat when it suits you, but most of your energy is reserved for the exchange of flying lead as you duck behind destructible bits of the environment and hope that your aim is good enough to wipe out all of the thugs that are gunning for you. If you let yourself run out of ammo, the game can get very frustrating as enemies stand two feet away and pelt you with bullets while you hug a wall that you're using for cover and fiddle with the camera. There's perhaps no sound more frightening than the echo of a hollow chamber when you expected a bang.	3.5/5

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