Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Nemesis review (GB) Reviewed on December 10, 2003 Don’t get it twisted. Nemesis is a remixed, scaled down Gradius, plain and simple. You fly from left to right and fire on everything in sight, encountering weaklings flying in formation, Moai heads literally spitting out Cheerios, and giant ships that move up and down firing sliver-like lasers for you to squeeze between. Konami/Ultra have down an admirable job here, making Nemesis one of the best shooters available for on-the-go killing sprees.
	Wizards & Warriors X: Fortress of Fear review (GB) Reviewed on December 10, 2003 I love side-scrollers, and someone knew this. I was duped, led astray, and the rest of it. I would gladly take on any Castlevania adventure (even The Adventure), The Legendary Axe, hell, even a rusty bladed generic Rastan mission. But X (may I call you X?) doesn’t deserve my hack and slashing skills, nor does it deserve yours. More importantly, our hack and slash skills are unlikely to measure up to this evil cartridge's challenge.
	Donkey Kong review (GB) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 You can't get a much better game than this for on the go play. Donkey Kong is the stuff, really it is. It's not what you think: it's not just a little plumber named Mario (formerly Jumpman) leaping over barrels sent his way by an angry ape. There's a lot more to it this time 'round.
	Bonk's Revenge review (GB) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 It pains me to sum up this Bonk experience, because there are little in the way of saving graces. And I love the series. And I loved Bonk's Adventure for the Gameboy despite its utter lack of challenge and intensity. Charm saw it through! The utter lack of challenge is back in this sequel, but the charm is nowhere to be found.
	Bonk's Adventure review (GB) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 Bonk's Adventure for the Gameboy starts off looking like it's going to be a direct port of the Turbografx-16 classic. But it's not! The game stars the same big-headed caveman who bonks all his enemies with his noggin, and the story and some of the locales are the same, but things have been changed up just a bit, and that's somewhat refreshing.
	Ristar review (GG) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 The evil doings of Greedy roused a sleeping star. His name is Ristar. We’ve seen him before; he took on Greedy in his side-scrolling Sega Genesis adventure with such style and grace as to cement for himself a place among the very best in his genre. The cutesy platformer genre (also known as the mascot genre) was imbued with the young star’s startling brilliance, and though Ristar never achieved the popularity of a Super Mario, or a Sonic, those who have taken control of the celestial phenomenon know his greatness.
	Sonic the Hedgehog 2 review (GG) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 The obnoxious, unforgiving failure that is Sonic the Hedgehog 2 for the Game Gear can be extremely enjoyable on a very obscure, smallish level. Unfortunately, to access that slim slice of playability, cheating is necessary and encouraged.
	The Lucky Dime Caper Starring Donald Duck review (GG) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 It all begins on Huey, Dewey, and Louie’s birthday, as Uncle Scrooge gives each of them a lucky dime as a gift. When the boys inquire why their cheapskate uncle couldn't buy them something good, like BeyBlades or whatever it is kids like, the despicable miser tells them a lame copout tale of his rise to riches from a time when he started out with just one dime (snicker).
	Revenge of Drancon review (GG) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 Nice one, Sega. You see, Sega already released this game for their Master System console years before the arrival of their Game Gear unit. It was called Wonderboy.
	Aerial Assault review (GG) Reviewed on December 09, 2003 I've never played a slower shooter than Aerial Assault. Perhaps the SNES's Blazeon comes close, but aside from that, nothing can touch the outright languidness with which this shooter scrolls along. Shooter skies are normally veritable metal gauntlets of enemy craft, filled in with labyrinths of laser fire. Not Aerial Assault. Most skies are completely serene and empty, the same backdrop passing by over and over again like a Flintstones episode.
	Ikaruga review (GCN) Reviewed on December 07, 2003 If a white attack hits you while you're white, you don't receive damage--in fact, you absorb power which can then be stored for a special attack. However, if a black attack hits you while you're white, your ship explodes, and you lose a life. Obviously, this system works the other way around as well. What sounds like a fairly simple concept makes for some of the most intense gaming moments I have ever come across.
	Final Fantasy Tactics Advance review (GBA) Reviewed on December 06, 2003 What this means is that if you're willing to devote enough time to the effort, you can have a kickass warrior who isn't afraid to cast a healing spell every once in awhile. Of course, the downside to all of this is that while you're learning those killer mage skills, you're weak to physical attacks from enemies. Or while you're learning how to handle a sword, you're dumb as a post and can't use magic.
	Neutopia review (TG16) Reviewed on December 06, 2003 Neutopia may be the darkest of all action-RPGs I've come across, as if a layer of the brightest colour was stripped away. Even the colour of the sunlit outdoors is subdued. Similarly, the trumpeting fanfare that sounds games of this ilk is not so evident here. Instead, the music of the spheres seems wistful, and is easily overpowered for thematic presence by the somber sweetness of the Labyrinths' tunes.
	Legendary Axe II review (TG16) Reviewed on December 06, 2003 At the best of times, Axe II's atmosphere is a hypnotic, quiet storm, like a side-scrolling, medieval Silent Hill; but at the worst of times it is just a morose mission of tedium.
	The Legendary Axe review (TG16) Reviewed on December 05, 2003 Sure, Axe is well drawn, with a gorgeous palette used shamelessly to adorn the exotic locales that your barbarian hero Gogan treks through to find Flare. But perhaps more importantly -- from the darkness of the forest, to the brightness of a mountain plateau; from the quiet mystery of a cavern, to the fanfare of one of the great final confrontations - Axe is dripping with that most elusive quality: atmosphere.
	Legend of Hero Tonma review (TG16) Reviewed on December 05, 2003 Fans of the arcade Tonma will embrace this much easier to play rendition, as things have been toned down to approachable levels for the Turbo version. With practice, you’ll soon find it feasible to beat Tonma on one man, something that seems nigh-impossible with the obstinate original coin-op.
	Keith Courage In Alpha Zones review (TG16) Reviewed on December 04, 2003 Firstly, the story: we are to help a young Keith defend his world from B.A.D. - Beastly Alien Dudes. Though you are no doubt thinking to yourself how powerful an acronym that is, there are those, such as myself, who find it corny, and indicative of how generic the game itself is despite its best efforts to prove otherwise.
	J.J. & Jeff review (TG16) Reviewed on December 04, 2003 Much of this title's humour was deemed inappropriate for North American audiences at the time of its release, though it will seem tame now. Thus, in bringing JJ & Jeff over from Japan, someone undoubtedly felt they were doing us all a huge favour by censoring stuff as mundane and commonplace as a fart joke (Hudson replaced the fart attack function in our version with a lame spray can).
	R-Type DX review (GBC) Reviewed on November 28, 2003 Irem managed to shrink down almost everything and present their flagship's first two strikes intact. It's amazing to hear the music so true to the arcade, to feel that the control is as tight as it is in its console big brothers, and to see that everything is so well represented graphically to boot. Whoever made the decisions on what details to forego, and what to retain, earned their salary. The well outlined characters and backgrounds makes things easy to see on the small screen.
	Insector X review (GEN) Reviewed on November 26, 2003 This isn't the Insector X, from the arcade, that also made the trip to the NES. Gone are the stupidly cutesy characters, replaced by a more serious bunch. The game is still a lame horizontal shooter though - that much hasn't changed.

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