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Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Do You Like Horny Bunnies? 2 (PC)

Do You Like Horny Bunnies? 2 review (PC)

Reviewed on February 26, 2006

I should also mention that because Do You Like Horny Bunnies? 2 is a sequel (the ‘2’ in its title should have tipped you off), there’s some fan service. If you played the original, you’ll recognize two of the characters from that game. They engage in a bit of unexpected sex, which you get to watch unfold if you play your cards right.
honestgamer's avatar
Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams (PlayStation 2)

Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams review (PS2)

Reviewed on February 24, 2006

It's a return to grace for a series in danger of losing itself, and in a way, reaffirms the belief that only Capcom know how to deliver a solid, third person slash'em up. You can have your 3D Castlevanias and your weak as piss American imitations, the real action however, once more belongs to Keiji Inafune and the Genma hordes.
midwinter's avatar
Shaq-Fu (SNES)

Shaq-Fu review (SNES)

Reviewed on February 22, 2006

If you’ve been playing games and surfing the internet for any considerable length of time, you’ve no doubt come across a review of Shaq Fu that was filled with witty remarks, jabs at Shaq’s bald head, and the unabashed bashing of voodoo (something that Shaq Fu proudly supports) No doubt, said review convinced you that Shaq Fu sucks, complaining about it’s bad storyline and its bad graphics and its bad controls.
lasthero's avatar
Drakengard 2 (PlayStation 2)

Drakengard 2 review (PS2)

Reviewed on February 20, 2006

If Dynasty Warriors wrote the book on manly brawling, then Drakengard 2 filled a library. By game's end, thousands of ogres, undead soldiers, and knights will fall with blood spraying from their broken heads. However! Fans of the first game be warned: you no longer play as an insatiable madman!
zigfried's avatar
Addams Family Values (SNES)

Addams Family Values review (SNES)

Reviewed on February 20, 2006

Or you'll become befuddled by your umpteenth encounter with one of Addams Family Values' favorite underworld "puzzles" — the games of "Guess Which Teleporter Won't Move You Back Eight Rooms" and "Randomly Push These Switches Until You Do It Right". This cartridge did a fantastic job of making me feel that it was either dumb luck or trial-and-error that got from one place to the next, as opposed to anything resembling skill or gaming knowledge.
overdrive's avatar
The Suffering (PlayStation 2)

The Suffering review (PS2)

Reviewed on February 19, 2006

In The Suffering, the abominations you encounter are not mazes to find your way past, but obstacles to be destroyed. Like a 1970s grindhouse flick, you’ll find yourself standing amid piles of bodies, blood drenching every scrap of skin and clothing left on your body.
pup's avatar
Devil May Cry 3: Special Edition (PlayStation 2)

Devil May Cry 3: Special Edition review (PS2)

Reviewed on February 16, 2006

That’s why Special Edition succeeds as a game and as a re-release: It makes things simple without making them easy. Forget the smooth control system or the sweet level design; I’m talking about the accessibility. How the game offers difficulties for all skill levels, tailored for the weakest of the weak and the hardest of the hardcore.
lasthero's avatar
Monkey Puncher (Game Boy Color)

Monkey Puncher review (GBC)

Reviewed on February 16, 2006

Choosing either of the two siblings, Kenta or Sumire, make no difference to the overall aim of the game, which is to raise and train a monkey strong enough to topple the Saru group and freeing your imprisoned family. Handily, you happen to obtain a feisty little monkey by the name of Freddy who may very well be your token to glory, vengeance and the possible triggering of Armageddon.
EmP's avatar
Final Fantasy III (SNES)

Final Fantasy III review (SNES)

Reviewed on February 16, 2006

Certainly, you can take that route if you wish. Or… you can slow down and have a good time exploring each of the world’s nooks and crannies. There are even optional monster and towers you can defeat for seriously cool rewards. Much of the game’s second half is optional but cool. You can play however you like, with only a few exceptions. Some choices you make can even affect the game’s plot.
honestgamer's avatar
Call of Duty 2 (Xbox 360)

Call of Duty 2 review (X360)

Reviewed on February 13, 2006

Until now, games based on World War Two have dodged a moral bullet thanks to the various limitations of the hardware supporting them. Arguments regarding the representation of mankind's darkest hour as a form of entertainment have covered everything from simple bad taste, to the trivialization of our greatest tragedy, yet the nay-sayers it seems, have been missing the point.
midwinter's avatar
Legend of Hero Tonma (TurboGrafx-16)

Legend of Hero Tonma review (TG16)

Reviewed on February 12, 2006

It seemed I was challenged virtually every step of the way in the fifth level's cavern and the sixth stage's castle exterior, assaulted by fireball-spewing statues and an infinite number of knights, bats and other baddies on a non-stop basis. For the earlier stages, it seemed like I'd cruise through a few easy waves of enemies, briefly struggle to get through one tricky part and then realize I already was at the boss fight.
overdrive's avatar
GUN (Xbox 360)

GUN review (X360)

Reviewed on February 11, 2006

It's one of those "good but" games. GUN is good, but its Western atmosphere is disappointingly sedate. With yellow ground, brown buildings, and simple textures (why is this on 360?), it's not nearly as visually appealing as Death By Degrees on PS2. The characters are always genuinely likable or appropriately detestable, but they're too often treated as disposables. There's a nice end-game twist, but that end comes too quickly.
zigfried's avatar
Marvel Nemesis: Rise of the Imperfects (Xbox)

Marvel Nemesis: Rise of the Imperfects review (XBX)

Reviewed on February 07, 2006

3-D comic battles have something that 2-D just can’t touch. Hiding behinds walls and trucks, dodging and running to stay one step ahead. Cars explode, the pavement cracks, the walls crumble and anyone familiar with comics won’t be surprised. After all, when you’re dealing with bruisers like the Ever Lovin’ Blue-Eyed Thing or the Invincible Iron Man, property damage is a given.
lasthero's avatar
Girlish Grimoire Littlewitch Romanesque (PC)

Girlish Grimoire Littlewitch Romanesque review (PC)

Reviewed on February 06, 2006

Between schoolroom lessons, you can send the girls out on life-enriching quests or "interact" with special guest tutors to earn fabulous magical prizes. Depending on how you train the girls and on which of the completely optional diplomas you choose to pursue, it's possible to achieve twenty different endings that would make even Princess Maker 2 vets jealous.
zigfried's avatar
Final Fantasy III (NES)

Final Fantasy III review (NES)

Reviewed on February 03, 2006

At times, it seems that regardless of how many characters you have casting healing spells, you won’t be able to keep up with the damage caused by these baddies, especially when they’re whipping out powerhouse spells like Quake, Flare and Meteo on a turn-by-turn basis. If you DON’T kill them quickly, you can rest assured they'll be dining on the seared bones of your heroes that night.
overdrive's avatar
Bubble Bobble Double Shot (DS)

Bubble Bobble Double Shot review (DS)

Reviewed on February 03, 2006

When you consider the process of remaking a classic, it's surprising how many times the new & improved product eventually disappoints. In a perfect world, developers would cautiously add a fresh lick of paint, fine tune the controls, then ship the game without burying it under a pile of noxious, modern thinking crap. Take note Taito, that was your first mistake.
midwinter's avatar
The Magical Quest starring Mickey Mouse (SNES)

The Magical Quest starring Mickey Mouse review (SNES)

Reviewed on January 31, 2006

After besting the serpent in the forest, you’ll venture deeper into the trees. Here, gnarled trunks are twisted into malicious grins. Giant leaves tumble in gusts of wind and enormous spiders dart about on silvery webbing. Your new defense against these is the ability to weave magical spells, then toss them toward your opponents.
honestgamer's avatar
Chrono Cross (PlayStation)

Chrono Cross review (PSX)

Reviewed on January 30, 2006

I do not care for this game.
EmP's avatar
Mercenaries: Playground of Destruction (PlayStation 2)

Mercenaries: Playground of Destruction review (PS2)

Reviewed on January 30, 2006

But it’s never hopeless. There are no dead ends. There’s always some way, some strategy, some spin that can turn the hardest mission into the easiest. Victory comes from ingenuity.
lasthero's avatar
Civilization IV (PC)

Civilization IV review (PC)

Reviewed on January 29, 2006

You expand by building cities. The game doesn’t even feel right until you’ve done so, and once you have, the possibilities start pouring in. Each city produces food, commodities, wealth, culture, warriors, settlers, explorers and headaches. They do this over a set number of turns, so the person who builds a few cities early on will never lack things to do.
honestgamer's avatar

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