Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Everyday Shooter review (PS3) Reviewed on December 17, 2008 I don’t care what you’re doing, it’s instantly way cooler when things are exploding and someone’s riffing on a guitar behind it. That you’re the cause of these explosions and riffs makes Everyday Shooter not only amazingly cool, but also extremely addictive.
	Europa Universalis III Complete review (PC) Reviewed on December 17, 2008 Approximately a year ago, Jason Venter reviewed the vanilla version of Europa Universalis III for this very site. Jason articulately chronicled his rise to power as Calais in the fifteenth century, writing of how rebels would easily seize territory and he would hastily be defeated. Mr.Venter discovered, very quickly, the importance of being a competent leader. The people do not respond well to being constantly drafted into the forces, nor do they appreciate needlessly high taxes. If you are a fair ruler and concentrate on appeasing the masses (along with your neighbours) then the game makes for a very pleasant experience.
	March! Offworld Recon review (PC) Reviewed on December 16, 2008 If March-exclamation-mark-Offworld Recon had simply flashed up a load of static images of killer robots and huge chain-guns, layered on top of its preposterous midi-techno soundtrack, I'd have had a hell of a lot more fun. This is a first-person shooter with about as much personality and intrigue as a beige wall. There's far less context to it all than the original Doom. It manages to spectacularly predate a fifteen-year-old game in every conceivable way apart from when it was released.
	Chrono Trigger review (DS) Reviewed on December 15, 2008 The best addition to the game proves to be the use of the DS to redesign the menus and controls, and the dual screen functionality which makes viewing the menus a breeze. It might not be much more than a fresh look at the classic, but then fans weren’t really looking for a reinvention.
	Nancy Drew Dossier: Lights, Camera, Curses! review (PC) Reviewed on December 15, 2008 Despite my worst fears, Nancy Drew has not undergone a lobotomy. Lights, Camera, Curses! is the premier of the Nancy Drew Dossier series, designed specifically for detectives crunched for time. But even though it requires less brain power to solve, Curses still shows the super sleuth at her resourceful best.
	Hot Pinball review (ARC) Reviewed on December 15, 2008 The theme of each board? Health class diagrams of the female reproductive system!
	Football Director DS review (DS) Reviewed on December 15, 2008 Football Director DS is a promising youth team player. The foundations for a worthwhile asset are there for all to see; it simply needs to be carefully cultivated in the future to reach full potential.
	Spider-Man: Web of Shadows review (X360) Reviewed on December 15, 2008 So to conclude that Web of Shadows was loaded with potential would be quite the understatement. Ultimately, the game fails miserably to live up to that potential, sort of like Penny Hardaway. And why is that? Because Web of Shadows drags. Oh how it drags.
	Kaboom! review (A2600) Reviewed on December 14, 2008 Notorious serial bomber Baron von Blitzkrieg is astir once more, perched against an entirely gray background atop a solid olive green wall, awaiting his cue to strike. Still adorned in the black-and-white striped jailbird outfit he broke out of the big house in – the ensemble accessorized by the black mask with cutout eyeholes stretched across the width of his face – the criminal mastermind holds his soon to be unleashed explosive in the palms of his hands, a scowl perpetually across his face, only fleeting for the few brief seconds when victory is his. The crew-cut culprit stands motionless, emotionless, daring us to dare him.
	Boxing review (A2600) Reviewed on December 14, 2008 Despite its rudimentary appearance, fundamental match rules, and the fact the only sound effect present is the ungraceful grunt of worn leather connecting with human hide, Boxing still manages to present an engaging experience, albeit for a short period of time, due to its scoring system. Landed punches by either Floyd or Samuel will be tallied as either one or two points, depending on the accuracy and impact of the blow, with the total scores posted at the top of the screen. And this is where strategy starts to come into play.
	Super Mario Land review (GB) Reviewed on December 14, 2008 Two levels amongst the dozen total stand out; the conclusion of the second world forces Mario into a missile-armed submarine for some side-scrolling shmup action while in the finale he becomes a red baron and takes to the skies to battle bird menace Biokinton and final boss Tatanga in a similar manner. Never before, and never since, has Mario strayed into this genre, and though relatively easy forays, the best reason to play Super Mario Land is for these novelties. The simple departures from the formulaic platforming are endearing; there's an unuttered joy in bursting blocks and collecting coins far from the established series manner. And if you'd rather be bopping enemies on the head, these levels hardly overstay their welcome. More likely you'll be wanting more.
	The Castlevania Adventure review (GB) Reviewed on December 11, 2008 Virtually all of this level is you in a race against time while spikes descend upon you, chase you as you ascend a tower and follow after you while you sprint to the left. You'll be jumping across plummeting platforms and narrow blocks like crazy, whipping worms who stand in your path and doing whatever you can to stay ahead of the pursuing spikes. With a character that neither jumps nor moves well. After getting through all that, I was so mentally drained I wasn't even bothered by how pitifully weak the humanoid bat creature boss wound up being.
	A Vampyre Story review (PC) Reviewed on December 10, 2008 A Vampyre Story has the overflowing charm of the Lucas Arts classics, it's voiced properly and it's completely stable. It's fabulously drawn and suitably silly, with puzzles that follow at least the classic adventure school of logic. It has some of the best cinematic sequences I've seen in a long time. It has characters I actually wanted to speak to, instead of just stabbing them repeatedly in the face with a spork. But sometimes, just sometimes... it's a bit boring.
	Pet Pals: New Leash on Life review (PC) Reviewed on December 08, 2008 Pet Pals: New Leash on Life isn't all snuggles and kisses. Through 38 patient examinations, it illustrates realistic courses of medical treatment for animals in need. Given its subtitle, though, this game should've gone further in expounding the challenges in adoption.
	Multiwinia: Survival of the Flattest review (PC) Reviewed on December 08, 2008 Rather than carefully constructing a balanced army, Multiwinia demands victory through superior manouvers, feinting and flanking, and knowing when to retreat and when to press the attack. Should you amass your Multis for a later assault, or have them charge out of the spawn points to bolster that choke point? All this planning might sound complicated, but Multiwinia's intuitive interface frees up enough brainpower to make tactical planning almost instinctual, as easy as 3.141592653589...
	The King of Fighters Collection: The Orochi Saga review (PSP) Reviewed on December 08, 2008 Individually, these are all solid fighting games, particularly the first (’94) and the last (’98). Together, their flaws are much more apparent. If you like one or more of The King of Fighters games, chances are you’ll enjoy this collection – especially if you’ve been longing to have the series in high-quality handheld form.
	Robocalypse review (DS) Reviewed on December 08, 2008 Robocalypse is much easier to grasp than it sounds and includes a very thorough tutorial (interwoven with the first few missions) to ensure that gamers know what they’re doing. The instruction booklet is quite helpful in this regard, as it details almost everything you’ll need to know to get started. And though you can accuse Robocalypse of playing it safe with standard RTS features, the execution is above average for a handheld game.
	Ninjatown review (DS) Reviewed on December 08, 2008 Everyone knows about Ninjas. Their infamous reputation precedes them everywhere. If you close your eyes, you can probably picture one in your mind. Clad entirely in black, they're a short, round people with no discernible hands or feet. Their society resides in small, colored huts based on their station and they all survive by eating delicious shuriken-cookies, which also double as a form of currency. ...Wait, what?
	Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4 review (PS2) Reviewed on December 06, 2008 The character imbalance may irk some fans but doesn't actually make the game less fun, and for the most part Persona 4 has its own identity, plot, and tone wholly independent of Persona 3's. Given what a massively influential title Persona 3 was, and how easy it would've been to make the entirety of Persona 4 about reminding you how much you liked Persona 3, the fact that Persona 4 is an actual interesting game in its own right is really a bit extraordinary.
	Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance review (GBA) Reviewed on December 04, 2008 Adding to the intrigue, a couple of meetings with Dracula's top subordinate, Death, seem to show that the grim reaper seems more than a bit confused as to what's going on and why his master's castle even returned. Fortunately for Juste, the instant Death figures everything out, he tells the Belmont everything in a fit of excessive gloating, which eventually leads to the endgame and (if you meet certain stipulations) happy ending. And Dracula keeps this guy on staff for what reason?

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