Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Antipole review (X360) Reviewed on February 22, 2011 The gimmick is simple. Go to the right and win. You can jump, you can shoot, and you can invert gravity within a certain radius of the character. And that's it. There's no plot or villain, just you, a plasma rifle, and a hellish maze of circular saws, moving platforms, and angry robots.
	Castlevania: Symphony of the Night review (X360) Reviewed on February 10, 2011 On the other hand, the Reverse Castle possesses the Crissaegrim. This sword, only obtainable as a dropped item by a particular monster (one so weak, you'd never expect it to hold something so godly) is one of my all-time guilty pleasures in gaming. In an instant, Alucard goes from a mere overpowered protagonist to a deity of unholy destruction, flinging waves of agony in front of him with every tap of the attack button. Even the fearsome Guardian suits of armor will fall in no time, while many bosses can be obliterated before they even seem to be fully aware an intruder is in their lair. Few things in gaming can provide the sort of savage, sadistic joy this sword does.
	The Ball review (PC) Reviewed on February 06, 2011 Ballin'
	LittleBigPlanet 2 review (PS3) Reviewed on February 02, 2011 Today’s play session lasted several hours, but I could have just as easily have devoted weeks to the same endeavor. There are literally thousands of options left for me to explore. I’m not sure that I would have believed just how much there is to the LittleBigPlanet 2 community if I hadn’t had the chance to experience it for myself. The people at Media Molecule and Sony have the right to be proud of what they have accomplished, and so do the creative gamers who have become a part of it.
	Crimecraft: Bleedout review (PC) Reviewed on January 30, 2011 It has the chance to stand out from the crowd, to not be just another also-ran, but it would be unfair to say it’s there right now. Should it continue down this path, its future looks promising.
	Cthulhu Saves the World review (X360) Reviewed on January 28, 2011 Thus begins the Old One’s quest for backwards redemption -- defeating some evil so he can unleash a greater evil. Sulking along the sandy beach he arrived at, he rescues his first party member, a star-struck water-based healer who incorrectly paints Cthulhu as her rescuing knight, and stomps off to his first village where he undertakes such heroic tasks as Saving A Boy’s Dog From A Cave.
	ZP2KX: Zombies and Pterodactyls 20XX review (X360) Reviewed on January 24, 2011 You could choose to mow them down with machine pistols or shotguns. With rocket launchers, plasma cannons or flare guns. With flamethrowers, assault rifles, proxy mines, grenade launchers or samurai swords. Railguns, icebeams, mini-nukes, souped-up pistols, golden guns or just a plain old kick to the head.
	Dirty Larry: Renegade Cop review (LYNX) Reviewed on January 23, 2011 Like Kung Food, Dirty Larry compensates with enough health that you can get lucky and progress through much of the game. Both are examples of games that are fundamentally poor and have used above average size lifebars to try to hide the damning facts, that hits on opponents often don't register and situations they create incur unavoidable damage on the player. Both are barebones concept games with zero creativity after the initial concept and failed execution throughout.
	Xenon 2: Megablast review (GEN) Reviewed on January 23, 2011 I respect Xenon 2 for the envelopes it pushed, but this doesn’t qualify it for a free pass; it doesn’t excuse its mistakes. Remember its innovations fondly, if you like, just don’t revisit them. There’s no reason to; no reward for your efforts. Just one final note from Bitmap Brothers saying “By the way? We know you cheated to get this far, and we hate you.”
	Kung Food review (LYNX) Reviewed on January 21, 2011 Kung Food is recommended if your only system is the Atari Lynx.
	Medal of Honor review (PS3) Reviewed on January 14, 2011 Medal of Honor can barely claim to being more than half a game, the half it does right, it excels. The other half isn’t bad for a first attempt -- but that’s not really good enough, is it?
	101-in-1 Sports Party Megamix review (WII) Reviewed on January 11, 2011 I’m simply going to present the facts. Nothing here works. Even with its budget title status, it’s not worth the price of admission.
	Red Dead Redemption review (X360) Reviewed on January 08, 2011 You’ll want to squeeze every second of life from Red Dead Redemption. You’ll do this because you know that, sooner or later, the game will end and you’ll no longer be a part of its world. You‘ll want to elongate your stay. And John Marston will let you, because there might be someone out there somewhere he hasn’t shot at yet.
	Kirby's Adventure review (NES) Reviewed on January 08, 2011 Kirby's Adventure is innocence; a reminder of a youth full of optimism and dreams where even the thought of pitfalls seemed incomprehensible. When life gets me down, it offers solace as its bright colors, wildly varying levels and unrelenting cuteness overwhelm me until I have no choice but to smile and lose myself in the game. Even after all these years, it still has that effect — something that makes me grateful.
	Astonishia Story review (PSP) Reviewed on January 01, 2011 I can’t help but think of Astonisha Story bravely treading water. It was never in its nature to be spectacular, but it could have settled with quietly competent had Ubisoft thrown it a life preserver rather than hurled rocks from the shore.
	Pocket Pool review (PSP) Reviewed on December 30, 2010 HyperDevbox Japan surely set out to do something different, by giving us ‘erotic pool.’ The word on the street is that publishers Conspiracy and Eidos sought to use the Girls Gone Wild license and do something really distinct, but talks fell through. As such, we’re stuck with a random collection of stills and short video clips of nude models and outright porn stars as our erotic content.
	Gunstar Heroes review (PS3) Reviewed on December 21, 2010 Your mission is straightforward enough: As one of the two Heroes — twin brother Red or Blue — you must foil the nefarious Colonel Red (the doppelganger of Street Fighter II’s M. Bison) who has stolen the four Mystic Gems in an plot to unleash the all-powerful Golden Silver — and you’ll want to release your brainwashed older brother Green and rescue hopeless ally Yellow along the way.
	Resident Evil: Survivor review (PSX) Reviewed on December 21, 2010 We’ve been able to rely on Resident Evil games for certain ingredients that bespeak their quality: amazing polygonal graphics, cheesy cinematic cut scenes, and their ability to spook the player. Survivor only gets the cheese right. This game looks horrid, but fails to provide the horror.
	Kozu review (X360) Reviewed on December 18, 2010 Kozu is one of THOSE games that pop up on XBLA in droves; it’s a duel stick shooter that we should really be more pissed at Geometry Wars for popularising. We could try really hard to pretend that Kozu isn’t the latest contender in the homebrew developer’s favourite genre choice, but your denial would have to be measured in galaxies to overcome the sheer volume of evidence to the contrary. So, let’s not. Let’s just talk about how Kozu is an okay little game, but not one to reach the loft heights preset by the likes of Z0MBIES and Zombie Estate.
	Splatterhouse review (PS3) Reviewed on December 09, 2010 Once upon a time, all this blood and nudity would have been daring. I remember gasping in awe when playing the originals . . . of course, those were marketed towards pre-teens who couldn't even get into R-rated flicks. In today's world, hacking up misshapen beasts and grabbing softcore pics just isn't enough.

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