Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Desert Falcon review (Atari 7800) Reviewed on June 24, 2011 After playing this game for a few hours, I discovered that my favorite power-up was the one that warped me straight to the boss, so I could kill it and move to the next level in the hopes of finding the proper three glyphs to do it again. You get FAR more points for wasting them than for doing anything else and Desert Falcon is a rather repetitive game, where one level blends into the next with no real difference besides the density of enemy waves and the background color.
	Dungeon Siege III review (X360) Reviewed on June 23, 2011 Despite some subquests and optional grinding, it’s mostly a long winding trip down an inevitable path, and often times back along the inevitable path. Expect to do a lot of walking. This is a hallmark of the Dungeon Siege series, so it should be no surprise that it hasn’t changed. But developer Obsidian has tried to infuse it with a choice-and-consequence system. In theory, this seems like a great idea. But in practice, it’s the difference between an attack rating of 142 and an attack rating of 145. Was it worth reading through all that dialogue?
	Bump 'N Jump review (A2600) Reviewed on June 22, 2011 Maybe a particular body of water is too long to clear in just one jump, so you'll have to time things in order to hit an island in the middle of the lake and immediately jump again to clear the rest of it. Or maybe two small ponds will be close together. If you jump at full speed, you'll easily clear the first one...and then helplessly watch as you said over the strip of land between them, only to crash into the second inches from clearing it.
	The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D review (3DS) Reviewed on June 19, 2011 When I started playing the actual game, though, my perspective changed almost immediately. Link’s prophetic nightmare, the shivering elven boy on the straw mattress, the dying monarch of the forest summoning a fairy and the awkward bump against the fence that looks too much like an open waffle iron all unfolded almost exactly the way I remembered them from previous trips through the game, but I realized with surprise that something unexpected was taking place: I was loving each moment again.
	Duke Nukem Forever review (PC) Reviewed on June 16, 2011 The inspiration is, of course, the venerable Duke Nukem 3D, a groundbreaking over-the-top comedy shooter that had actual gameplay when it came out 15 years ago. But in Duke Nukem Forever, it's tough to use the word "inspiration". When you come across a nod to the original game, it feels like it was chucked in carelessly. Here's a trip mine. Here's a holoduke. Here's a pigcop. Here's something like a boss fight. Here's a gun that shoots blue lasers. Here's a stripper.
	inFAMOUS 2 review (PS3) Reviewed on June 13, 2011 Have you ever had to take a road trip with people you can't stand? Early on, a couple of characters introduce the story and the gameplay progression by giving each other glowing doo-dads. Literally. Here's a glowing doo-dad for you. And here's one for you. That's an indication of the level of coherence and dramatic tension that will drive Infamous 2. And it just goes downhill, with sidekick Zeke as pointless as ever, a toughened Cole now gravelly voice like a Martin Sheen who won't take any guff, and the heavy-handed morality choices based on whether you prefer Nixx, the fiery-tempered black voodoo chick, or Kuo, the mopey Asian CIA agent turned ice mage.
	Castlevania: Lament of Innocence review (PS2) Reviewed on June 08, 2011 Mr. Exposition gives you the details of the plot, which basically comes down to Walter being a bit bored with eternal life, so for amusement, he kidnaps the loved ones of potential worthy opponents in order to engage in combat with the vengeful fighters. The old man lost his daughter to the vampire, but not his life or humanity. No, he's kept around to serve as a general store, so desperate to avenge his loss that he'll charge an arm and a leg for life-restoring potions and armor. A true humanitarian, this guy.
	Great Baseball review (SMS) Reviewed on June 03, 2011 Didn’t Sega ask itself that most obvious question that begs answering even now? What if the baseball game we make for our beloved Master System isn’t great? What then? Won’t we look like fools? What then? Will we fold? Most likely someone did ask that question, but was promptly fired and replaced by someone else’s son, and the so-so game that is Great Baseball was released anyway.
	Frozen Synapse review (PC) Reviewed on June 03, 2011 Generally speaking, multiplayer matches consist of a few minutes of head-scratching, a bit of experimentation, a final check, a click of the ‘Prime’ button, and an edge-of-seat wait for your opponent to submit his or her next turn. It’s often sensible to go and get on with something else while the time ticks away, but it’s difficult to do so when you’re so invested.
	Thor: God of Thunder review (PS3) Reviewed on June 01, 2011 You won’t have to play Thor much at all to see that the title is inspired by the highly successful God of War series. Kratos, the bald-headed warrior from that other series, has simply been replaced here by the blond-haired and impetuous Thor. Instead of wielding a whip, he swings a hammer around like a sword… when he’s not grabbing monsters three or four times his size and wrestling them to the ground by the horns. This is a “T”-rated game, though, so there are no severed heads or geysers of blood and there are no naked women in mini-games or elsewhere. Thor may be a god, but he lives in a bland world.
	Virtua Tennis 4 review (X360) Reviewed on May 31, 2011 It’s no easy task to follow up a perfect original game with sequel after sequel. Virtua Tennis will always be Virtua Tennis, no matter how you package it. In other words, Virtua Tennis will always be a joy to play.
	The Incredibles review (XBX) Reviewed on May 30, 2011 The story of Bob Parr and his gifted family of superheroes (wife, Mrs. Incredible; children, Violet and Dash) is told inexcusably poorly. When you finish the adventure, you still won’t know what the movie is about.
	B Team: Metal Cartoon Squad review (DS) Reviewed on May 30, 2011 Here’s the thing; I’ve not played Cannon Fodder since the early nineties, but I still recall the stand out levels, the clever geography and can appreciate the more subtle parodying of the hells of war. In its attempt to revitalise an older way of thinking, all B Team has managed to do is highlight the competence of that it tries to ape and show that it still can’t eclipse a game made almost two decades previous.
	Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale review (X360) Reviewed on May 26, 2011 Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale has a lot of glitches, very little plot, almost no enemy variety and a sloppy interface that sometimes makes playing the game a chore. The first few hours almost immediately feel tedious, but the game improves from there. Unfortunately, it never really does anything especially memorable.
	Dead or Alive: Dimensions review (3DS) Reviewed on May 25, 2011 Environments are expectedly gorgeous and expansive, with cascading waterfalls and rope bridges that span wide chasms. There also are the underground laboratory and ancient rooftop venues, and you can still knock your opponent from high ledges and then follow to kick his or her butt on lower ground. In other words, any concessions that had to be made due to the hardware have minimal impact on the presentation… when it comes to fights.
	Naruto Shippuden: Shinobi Rumble review (DS) Reviewed on May 24, 2011 In practice, Shinobi Rumble doesn't deliver superior single-player combat. The fighting mechanics are technically simple, the computer's strategies are equally unsophisticated, and the story mode is simple shorthand. If you're going at this solo, the game will occupy a few hours and then be forgotten forever.
	The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings review (PC) Reviewed on May 23, 2011 If you can look past the balancing, pacing and technical issues, there is an extremely solid RPG here - nothing especially innovative, but definitely a game that sets out to be the most absorbing, rich and spectacular experience it possibly can be. It’s a disappointment because it largely succeeds in that goal while fluffing the basics. The best RPG of the current generation? With a bit more care, it could have been.
	L.A. Noire review (X360) Reviewed on May 19, 2011 What eventually passes for core gameplay in LA Noire is a bad guessing game in which you have to decide whether people are lying and which bits of evidence from your inventory confirm the lie. It's all very vague, and you'll feel like quite the schmuck when you're sure you've cornered a suspect, only to realize that the game's writer was on a different page. Not that it matters, which is a terrible thing to say about core gameplay.
	Dragon Warrior II review (NES) Reviewed on May 19, 2011 Without those rose-colored memories, what we're left with is a decent older RPG that was a marked improvement on the first Dragon Warrior, but more than merely a step behind the third and fourth NES installments. I've played through those two games multiple times. When I picked up Dragon Warrior II a year or two after initially beating it, I think I got about halfway through before losing interest.
	Mount & Blade: With Fire and Sword review (PC) Reviewed on May 18, 2011 This kind of incompetence is old news, although one would have hoped that for the series' third outing the AI squadmates would be better at self-preservation. What makes it more frustrating than in the past, however, is that you simply cannot be enough of a superhero to make up for their ghastly mistakes. Because now there are all these guns, you see.

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