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Review Archives (Reader Reviews)

You are currently looking through reader reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
The Tick (SNES)

The Tick review (SNES)

Reviewed on April 20, 2004

Friends and neighbors, I have just returned from an exhausting sojourn. Not long before I left, my chin was smooth and my face was untarnished by age, but now I return to you with a long, straggling beard and many a wrinkle, wart, and pockmark on a visage once considered worthy of a goddess's kiss. Before my arduous voyage, I enjoyed the meat of the land with great voracity - some would say to disgusting excess. No more is my body a reflection of this enjoyment, though; my journey wore me down t...
snowdragon's avatar
EyeToy: Play (PlayStation 2)

EyeToy: Play review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 19, 2004

The other day two of my buddies and I were just sitting in my room when all the sudden these ninjas come out of no where and started attacking us. At first, we kept getting hit but eventually we were able to stop their onslaught. It was pretty freaking crazy; we didnít even realize what was happening. Even worse, a little later we got attacked by this huge boxing robot. I donít know what the hell that guy was thinking, but we pummeled him just like we were Muhammad Ali. Three soft jabs with the ...
asherdeus's avatar
Devil World (NES)

Devil World review (NES)

Reviewed on April 18, 2004

Satan may steeple his fingers with reserved glee every time a company releases the next Vice City, but deep down, we all know that the Prince of Darkness has a soft spot for the classics. Even in the early 1980s, he was busy at work planting the seeds of moral destruction in games like Pong and Pitfall!, or so the radical right will have you hear. And boy, was his mean streak really showing the day E.T. hit stores! But of all the gaming waters the devil has tainted with his poison fingertip, thi...
snowdragon's avatar
Casino Kid (NES)

Casino Kid review (NES)

Reviewed on April 16, 2004

When you first load up Casino Kid, youíll be greeted -- after a little screen introducing you to the tough world of high-stakes gambling -- with a view that will make you think of an RPG. Bear with me. You can move around and talk to characters in a casino, complete with tacky seventies pink and black checkerboard carpeting and ostentatious indoor plants. But when you first have a little dialogue with fellow casino patrons youíll begin to suspect that the rich, intense world you had envisioned i...
denouement's avatar
Madden NFL 2004 (PlayStation 2)

Madden NFL 2004 review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 16, 2004

As a matter of political correctness, itís somewhat taboo to talk about religion in reviews these days, but bear with my tangential introduction, because I have recently come to an important revelation. You see, I was raised as a Christian, which means I worship Jesus Christ, a Jewish preacher out of Nazareth, as my Lord and Savior: the embodiment of God on earth. Other religions revere inestimably holy prophets or wise men who have pointed the way to salvation -- for instance, Mohammed for Musl...
denouement's avatar
XIII (PlayStation 2)

XIII review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 16, 2004

Let's just say, this case has a distinct smell to it, a certain paranormal bouquet. -- Fox Mulder, The X-Files.
denouement's avatar
Rise to Honor (PlayStation 2)

Rise to Honor review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 15, 2004

Itís hard not to become interested in Sonyís latest action-adventure game Rise to Honor (RtH) because of the main character, Kit Yun. ďKit YunĒ may not be a familiar name, but Kitís character is built around the ever popular action-film star Jet Li, who was completely rendered, motion captured, and voiced for the game. Through the gameís introduction, weíre told that Kit is a bodyguard for a notorious leader of a Hong Kong crime syndicate. However, things arenít always so two-dimen...
asherdeus's avatar
Toilet Kids (TurboGrafx-16)

Toilet Kids review (TG16)

Reviewed on April 15, 2004

Us poor folks in America sure have gotten the short end of the stick havenít we? Doesnít it just seem like so many excellent and wonderful games from yesteryear never got released in our country? Sure, you can download ROMs, translation patches and all that jazz to play a number of these games now, but wouldnít it have been nice to go to your local store to buy Dragon Quest 6, Star Ocean or a Parodius game, so you could play them before they earned that ever-so-chic ďretroĒ reputation?
overdrive's avatar
Grandia II (Dreamcast)

Grandia II review (DC)

Reviewed on April 14, 2004

Do you want to know whatís uncommon? A decent Dreamcast RPG. Do you want to know whatís even rarer? A console RPG with a fun battle system. So many games in this genre have provided us with epic plotlines, lengthy sidequests and memorable characters, but I honestly canít think of any off the top of my head that had enjoyable battles. Now that Iíve played Grandia II I donít have to rack my brain thinking if such a game exists.
djskittles's avatar
Poly Play (Arcade)

Poly Play review (ARC)

Reviewed on April 13, 2004

There's still a small type of disgruntled deluded folks who think that Communism could or should actually work. They overlap well with gamers: lazy slobs who want something for nothing. These amateur politicians who have that perfect political philosophy pinned down between levels of Super Mario Brothers 3 and forget it because, well, they were swept up in the life and thoughts people ought to have are sadly deluded. They probably think the government's going to hand them a bag of quarters a wee...
aschultz's avatar
Wings of Wor (Genesis)

Wings of Wor review (GEN)

Reviewed on April 13, 2004

Shooters on the Genesis have let us pilot just about every form of craft ever conceived. Count the numerous times we have solely saved the galaxy at the controls of some futuristic ship, armed to the teeth with the most advanced lasers. Remember how we destroyed entire forces, in our planes and helicopters, leaving tanks smoking in our wake. Gynoug - or Wings of Wor - strays from this well trodden path, giving us the chance to don wings and take to the sky, to rid the planet Iccus of an evil mut...
djy8c's avatar
Bump 'n' Jump (Arcade)

Bump 'n' Jump review (ARC)

Reviewed on April 12, 2004

When I was young, I liked car crashes. In theory. Cars still scared me especially when I had major streets to cross, but I enjoyed signs depicting dangerous conditions on roads and dreamed of participating in an accident one day, not fully appreciating what this meant. The closest I came was falling off a Big Wheel, which ended in tears and a band-aid. Still, I certainly seemed to have more fun with cars than my mother, who preferred complaining about bad drivers and kids running out in the stre...
aschultz's avatar
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (GameCube)

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers review (GCN)

Reviewed on April 12, 2004

One ring to rule them all
bloomer's avatar
Wizard of Wor (Arcade)

Wizard of Wor review (ARC)

Reviewed on April 12, 2004

In 1980, Midway released into US arcades a coin-op maze game which was to become a cultural phenomenon. It was intuitive to play, cute and brilliantly designed, and was even as popular with the girls as it was with the boys. That game was the Namco-designed Pacman.
bloomer's avatar
OutRun (Genesis)

OutRun review (GEN)

Reviewed on April 07, 2004

Back in the mid-eighties, just as console gaming was being offered to the world. You could bet your life that any arcade you went in had an Outrun machine, whichever one of its few incarnations it may have been. From the standing cabinet with a steering wheel and pedals, to the full blown sit-down Ferrari red monster that looked like the car you drove in the game Ė you could be sure it was there.
djy8c's avatar
Hot Potato! (Game Boy Advance)

Hot Potato! review (GBA)

Reviewed on April 06, 2004

In Hot Potato, a group of however many players you want gathers in a circle, with the required equipment being: a small beanbag or ball or even an actual potato, some sort of musical recording and an appropriate playback device, and an impartial outsider. One usually finds this unbiased observer is a nursery school teacher, since most often the group of players is a nursery school class. The players proceed to pass, or throw -- you should decide at the outset what types of deliveries are permitt...
denouement's avatar
Jikkyou Oshaberi Parodius (SNES)

Jikkyou Oshaberi Parodius review (SNES)

Reviewed on April 06, 2004

Iím sure that horizontally-scrolling Super Nintendo shooter Jikkyou Oshaberi Parodius has a plot. After all, if you wait after starting up the game, you will be taken into a cinema scene. While the Japanese words and voice are both indecipherable to me, it is quite apparent that the game is trying to give me some form of story.
overdrive's avatar
Boulder Dash EX (Game Boy Advance)

Boulder Dash EX review (GBA)

Reviewed on April 05, 2004

Though Boulder Dash is not the most famous franchise name in the video game universe, it actually has a long and boring history. Read on to find out more!
denouement's avatar
Color a Dinosaur (NES)

Color a Dinosaur review (NES)

Reviewed on April 03, 2004

So here we are on the day known 'round the world as April Fools Day, and what game is considered a bigger joke among denizens of the gaming world than Color a Dinosaur? I believe I could bet that at some point in their childhoods everyone involved in the development of this game either ate rusty nails and paint chips, jumped off into a ravine because they thought they could fly, put plastic bags over their heads and had to be saved from asphyxiation by their parents, or did something that involv...
snowdragon's avatar
Hellfire (Genesis)

Hellfire review (GEN)

Reviewed on March 31, 2004

Being fronted with the one-man-against-the-universe plot isnít something unfamiliar when playing any of the multitude of shooters on the Genesis. Hellfire - one of the many arcade shooter ports here on the Genesis Ė isnít any exception, quite the same in fact. Set adrift from your mothership armed with only your regular weapon and the devastating, but limited, Hellfire laser, you are expected to save the universe from its impending doom.
djy8c's avatar

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