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Review Archives (Reader Reviews)

You are currently looking through reader reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Phantom Fighter (NES)

Phantom Fighter review (NES)

Reviewed on February 10, 2011

It's pitch-black and freezing. The wind doesn't chill your bones as much as the stillness hanging over all the Chinese villages. The hustle and bustle of human life had been replaced by the horrified screams of the villagers as the kyonshis, undead creatures of East Asian folklore, devoured them, and then there came only complete silence. Even the insects dare not buzz and pasturing animals remain invisible. If a man were to listen ...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Super Meat Boy (PC)

Super Meat Boy review (PC)

Reviewed on February 07, 2011

Like all good stories involving giant saw blades, exploding pieces of sentient meat, and evil fetuses, this one is about a girl.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
The Sims 3 (Xbox 360)

The Sims 3 review (X360)

Reviewed on February 07, 2011

The Sims 3 is everything casual games strive to be. Whether you’re a fan of the wildly popular virtual life simulation series or not, there’s never been a better time to jump in than now. There’s something for everyone here, all presented in the attractive signature style that made the series so popular in the first place. The Sims isn’t a series that necessarily caters to any one type of gamer specifically. Instead, it makes a far more ambitious appeal to society as a whole, offering an unrival...
Calvin's avatar
Hydlide (NES)

Hydlide review (NES)

Reviewed on February 05, 2011

You really do run into trouble with this one...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Eternal Sonata (Xbox 360)

Eternal Sonata review (X360)

Reviewed on February 01, 2011

Eternal Sonata is a J-RPG in which you follow a group of anime-inspired characters through an adventure that seems like most every other. Among the main three characters are Polka, a terminally ill teenage girl who's going on a soul searching journey; Allegretto, a homeless guy who excels in swordsmanship and has the hots for Polka; and Fredrick, the incarnation of renowned pianist Fredrick Chopin who is convinced that the fantastical world that Polka and Allegretto live in is his dream a...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Krazy Kreatures (NES)

Krazy Kreatures review (NES)

Reviewed on January 30, 2011

Imagine a modern match-three mobile game, except waaaaay dated.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Sega Touring Car Championship (Saturn)

Sega Touring Car Championship review (SAT)

Reviewed on January 30, 2011

The Saturn has been home to many a racing title, mostly created by Sega's own departments. They all tend to vary in quality, but regardless, each of those titles are memorable for something. Daytona USA, the big one, is a flawed port, but still enjoyable thanks to fun play mechanics, good track design, cool bonuses, and a great, cheesy soundtrack. Sega Rally Championship is known as a solid port, despite suffering from being too much of a straight one. Manx TT has sheep. You get the point. So wh...
dementedhut's avatar
Blood Drive (Xbox 360)

Blood Drive review (X360)

Reviewed on January 28, 2011

If you remove the hearts from Twisted Metal and Left 4 Dead and boil them down to their core ideas, what you have in Blood Drive is a near perfect fusion of the gameplay found in each. Twisted Metal has you steering cars occupied by sadists in a demolition derby and Left 4 Dead has you killing endless waves of zombies. Blood Drive has you participating in demolition derby events while running over loose zombies that have roamed onto the field...
asherdeus's avatar
Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time (PC)

Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time review (PC)

Reviewed on January 27, 2011

Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time wants to tantalize you with inventive gameplay and a fabulous 2D side scroller environment like a viewing into the past. However, one fatal flaw brings the whole construct crashing down. Building different devices to survive the hazards of the future is an intriguing idea, one crushed by shaky and inconsistent physics.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Xexyz (NES)

Xexyz review (NES)

Reviewed on January 24, 2011

Humanity nearly wiped itself clean off the map, and the Mother Nature attempted to aid the process with a few hundred natural disasters. Peaceful fairies then came along and built a nation on the bones and smoldering ruins of humanity and called it Xexyz. To keep peace and order, they established five cute anime girls as princesses, and everyone lived happily ever after.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
C: The Contra Adventure (PlayStation)

C: The Contra Adventure review (PSX)

Reviewed on January 23, 2011

This easily could have been an instance of jubilation of multiple satisfactions... had Konami grown a brain.
dementedhut's avatar
Mass Effect (PC)

Mass Effect review (PC)

Reviewed on January 23, 2011

fleinn's avatar
Cave Story (Wii)

Cave Story review (WII)

Reviewed on January 19, 2011

I knew after ages of searching through scores of dull family games, pointless platformer reboots, and obscure puzzle games that I would find a WiiWare game actually worth the price of admission. This game, ladies and gentlemen, is Cave Story. Never mind that this game is free on PC, the Wii version gives us a few new goodies, as well as updated graphics and sounds, the ability to use a controller instead of relying on a keyboard, and the same amazing gameplay that make it worth the $12 ...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood (PlayStation 3)

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood review (PS3)

Reviewed on January 18, 2011

Even before its release, Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood was the victim of utter scrutinization. Many knew the premise, but most wondered if the ideas present weren’t more than fancy add-on content. Multi-player they said. You don’t need to make an entirely new game for that! Angry retort from the R.E. 5 fans I suppose. How so many could say such a thing about one of the most ingenious, incredible franchises is beyond me, especially after the sequel. It now seems that I...
True's avatar
Alien Syndrome (Arcade)

Alien Syndrome review (ARC)

Reviewed on January 16, 2011

When we think about Sega of the 80s, we remember such classics like Space Harrier, Shinobi, OutRun, Phantasy Star, and After Burner; games that helped turn the company into a... temporary powerhouse. However, Sega did release a ton more games during that era, a disturbing amount, at times, and because of that, nearly all of them have been forgotten by the general gaming public. It's only when these games appear in a compilation, or when specific characters make cameos, that people go, "Hey! I re...
dementedhut's avatar
Fallout: New Vegas (Xbox 360)

Fallout: New Vegas review (X360)

Reviewed on January 16, 2011

It’s well past midnight and I cannot sleep. My conscience weighs heavily on me for what I have done. I have tried to prevent bloodshed, but in the end I have killed so many. I have tried to stand up to injustice, but in the end I have buckled under the weight of the corrupt and powerful. I have let down friends so I could avoid making enemies.
jerec's avatar
WWF: Betrayal (Game Boy Color)

WWF: Betrayal review (GBC)

Reviewed on January 16, 2011

Just what I wanted: a WWE game where you wrestle the backstage crew.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
The Magic of Scheherazade (NES)

The Magic of Scheherazade review (NES)

Reviewed on January 14, 2011

Leap off that steed and cast away that shining armor. It's time to take the hot sands, to don a turban and wield a scimitar with deadly grace. Leave behind those fantasies that have been final for fourteen games or those quests of the dragon kind, and delve into The Magic of Scheherazade. It's a wonderful RPG that maintains the sword and sorcery feel, yet changes the setting all together. It's not set in a world like medieval times, but more akin to Arabian Nights. With much t...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Jim Henson's Muppet Adventure No. 1: Chaos at the Carnival (Commodore 64)

Jim Henson's Muppet Adventure No. 1: Chaos at the Carnival review (C64)

Reviewed on January 10, 2011

If you're a seeker of esoterica or a man with a penchant for playing poorly made license titles, then Jim Henson's Muppet Adventure: Chaos at the Carnival is just the ticket. It's the crème de la crème of awful. Most wouldn't expect much of a Muppet game, maybe mediocrity at best, but I'm sure few would expect to be at the very bottom of the gaming totem pole. It's a license title with hardly any elements that attach it to its source material, loaded with just about every gaming flaw y...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Domino Rally (Wii)

Domino Rally review (WII)

Reviewed on January 09, 2011

You know those Japanese games with stupid-sounding gimmicks that rarely get released outside their native country, in fear of not selling well? Domino Rally is one such game that made it outside. Judging by the name, you're thinking this is just some domino... rally game. And you'd be sorta right. Domino Rally is about a man, or thing... this superhero, let's say, called Minon. He, or it, wears a yellow track suit, a face mask, and electronic visor with the words "Go! Go!" on it, l...
dementedhut's avatar

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