Review Archives (All Reviews)
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Sonic the Hedgehog review (GEN)Reviewed on March 16, 2005We all know the history of Sega vs. Nintendo. Nintendo probably had at least an 80% share of the market, and it was hard to imagine a company doing better than becoming Pepsi to Nintendo’s Coca-Cola. So here comes Sega with its version of a mascot that could presumably outrun the fastest cheetah, Speedy Gonzales, and of course, Mario. |
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WarioWare: Touched! review (DS)Reviewed on March 16, 2005Wario Ware Touched! |
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Need for Speed Underground: Rivals review (PSP)Reviewed on March 15, 2005Such feelings of lost opportunity don't stop there, though admittedly the worst is now behind us. Charging forward we look to the career modes, hoping to find a reason that justifies this charade. And in a way, this is where Rivals actually manages to surpass Ridge Racers, not in the short term rush but in the long, drawn out haul. |
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Sega Ages: Golden Axe review (PS2)Reviewed on March 15, 2005Although this new 3D Tyris isn't drawn quite as sexily as she used to be, the characters all looked attractive... until I saw them up close during their really lame magic spell sequences. As the camera zoomed in, I could see how few polygons were actually used to create the Amazon's pointy face. From then on, the illusion was shattered; even when the camera pulled back out, it was easy to spot the rough edges and graphical flaws because I knew they were there. |
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The Revenge of Shinobi review (GEN)Reviewed on March 14, 2005As I later encountered soldiers in a churning boatyard, soldiers patrolling a mechanical labyrinth, soldiers waiting in a rusty scrapyard, soldiers inside an abandoned factory, soldiers perched outside a shopping center, and soldiers stationed in friggin' highway traffic... well I got pretty freaking sick of SOLDIERS. |
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Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening review (PS2)Reviewed on March 14, 2005The question is however, how hard do you like your action? Do you enjoy a game steeped in technique and loaded with style? And if so, do you want it to kick your arse seven different ways to sunset, only to come back for more once the lights have gone out? If your reply was a confident sounding affirmative then hold on, I'm about to make your day. |
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Eternal Champions: Challenge from the Dark Side review (SCD)Reviewed on March 14, 2005Mortal Kombat made it big by overwhelming us with gratuitous gore and bloody fatalities. The concept of actually killing your opponent in the fight was a little more radical than just beating the snot out of them. Because of this irreverence, it became a controversial hit for all fighting game enthusiasts, playing the game just to see the blood and forgetting about the things that actually made a fighting game good. The sequel to Eternal Champions is an example of a game that follows a similar... |
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Sega Ages: Space Harrier review (PS2)Reviewed on March 14, 2005The thing Harrier's got going for it (that even some newer titles lack) is an incredible sense of speed, which picks up even more by the 21st level. The completely redesigned scenery — trees, stone columns, icebergs, and sun-bleached bones — scrolls by at dangerous speeds, and enemies scream by so quickly that you only have a second or two to shoot before they're gone. |
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Splatterhouse 2 review (GEN)Reviewed on March 13, 2005Splatterhouse was a fantastic gore-fest, packed with rotting body parts, blood stained hallways and gruesome monsters intent on ripping your guts out. It spawned a mass of controversy on its release and was ripped from arcades shortly after. This bloodbath was also ported to the Turbo-grafx 16, a great port that had a few things edited because of a Satanic reference, an upside down crucifix. It was an original platformer and was one of the first games that dared to go down paths that many games ... |
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Timeball review (TG16)Reviewed on March 13, 2005It's not often that a game comes along that alters the fabric of reality. Games that make you look back at the favorites of yesteryear and say "those weren't so special after all". Games that pull you into an orgasm just at the very sight of the decorative cover. Yes, those games are rare indeed. |
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Dark Cloud 2 review (PS2)Reviewed on March 13, 2005Near the beginning of the PS2's release a little-known game by the name of Dark Cloud was released. It was fun, but nothing special made it stand out other than its innovative, yet slightly restricted Georama system. It fell into a pit of mediocrity, and before the American release even hit, there was talk of a sequel. |
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Steel Empire review (GEN)Reviewed on March 12, 2005Blimps aren't the strongest selling point in this day and age, and they weren't a strong selling point back in 1992 either. Perhaps some people might enjoy the idea of gatling-toting, supercharged WWI aircraft flying into orbit and beyond, but the whole notion of sailing a blimp through an asteroid field struck me as being quite silly (and in this game's specific case, dull). |
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Wizards & Warriors X: Fortress of Fear review (GB)Reviewed on March 12, 2005I need you to bear with me. I have something I want to share, and it may sound irrelevant, but just give me some time; I promise to be brief, and it will all make sense in the end. |
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Manhunt review (PS2)Reviewed on March 12, 2005Death would have been a luxury for James Earl Cash, considering the hellish situation he was soon plunged into following his execution. He was a convict on Death Row, but that was so long ago, it hardly seemed necessary going into his past. Currently, he was cowering in the shadows like a cockroach while a band of street scum scoured the area, hurling threats and obscenities his way. Their baseball bats were strong enough to demolish concrete structures, and Cash was badly aching from one lucky ... |
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Thunder Force III review (GEN)Reviewed on March 12, 2005One level has a famous (and deservedly so) "fire" background, made up of wavey arcs of flame, swirling back and forth as you battle through inconveniently-placed rocky crags. Oddly enough, despite such a memorable background, the scenery is Thunder Force 3's primary graphical weakness. There are a couple levels with neat effects; however, when forced to impress on their own merits, the backgrounds fail. Some of the coloration is horrid — just look at the putrid green slobbery of the woods. |
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Resident Evil 4 review (GCN)Reviewed on March 11, 2005My first day at work consisted of washing countertops and cleaning dishes. Rookie cop Leon Kennedy wasn't so on the safe side. He arrived on the job expected to be berated for tardiness by his superior officer, but ended up battling his way through hordes of mindless zombies in the mountain resort Raccoon City. The Umbrella Corporation, an international pharmaceutical company that was the backbone of Raccoon City’s economy, had secretly been experimenting with viruses that changed inner biologic... |
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Alien Hominid review (PS2)Reviewed on March 11, 2005Yes, this little terror can decapitate America's finest intelligence officers and then pick his teeth. If he's feeling kinder, he can toss a mounted agent instead of getting brains on his wrinkly lips, but then, what's the fun in that? |
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The Incredibles review (GBA)Reviewed on March 11, 2005The Incredibles is easy like Sunday morning. I breezed through the thing in a few subway rides to and from work, losing only a life or two in the process, playing at a time when I am at my most bleary eyed and cack-handed. |
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The Incredibles review (PS2)Reviewed on March 11, 2005The story of Bob Parr and his gifted family of superheroes (wife Mrs. Incredible, children Violet and Dash) is told inexcusably poorly. When you finish the adventure, you still won’t know what the movie is about. |
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The House of the Dead 2 review (DC)Reviewed on March 10, 2005House 2 takes the "living dead" theme and runs with it, creating a far, FAR more enjoyable shooting experience than Romero's horrific magnum opus Daikatana. While this game is "only" an on-rails shooting bonanza, the levels have been designed with the care one might expect from an FPS (or more care, if the FPS in question is that trainwreck Isle of the Dead). Doors can be unlocked with keys, rescued civilians will lead you down alternate paths, and zombies will drag you into hidden sewer tunnels! |
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