Review Archives (All Reviews)

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Available Reviews
	Metal Slug 4 & 5 review (XBX) Reviewed on September 05, 2005 Metal Slug 4 is HARD, therefore it deserves an introduction. For the last couple of years, I've heard a lot of negative things about this game, like how totally different it is from previous Slugs, or that it's too easy. Now that I've finally had the chance to play the title in this double pack, I'm stumped. It's not the plague that almost everyone seems to claim it is, and for the most part, it's basically on par with its predecessors.
	SVC Chaos: SNK vs. Capcom review (XBX) Reviewed on September 04, 2005 What SVC Chaos does is offer a few hours of fun for the hardcore fan. If you’ve never played any of Capcom’s better efforts then stop reading this review, go out to your nearest game store and pick up a copy of Capcom vs. SNK 2. If you’ve already played that awesome game and want to delve further into the series, then picking SVC Chaos may satisfy your cravings. However, if you wanted more grooves, a cool character ensemble and awesome bosses, then you will be sorely disappointed by Pl...
	Super Mario Bros. 3 review (NES) Reviewed on September 04, 2005 They say nothing in this world's perfect, and I suppose that's true. But there are some things out there that seem to be so flawless, so impressive, so ingenious down to the tiniest detail, that we can't help but declare them, if not perfect, then perfect enough. Take Super Mario Bros 3 for example. Not only was it light years ahead of anything that came before it, but it was light years ahead of everything that came afterwards as well. It seems like Nintendo took every detail that I think i...
	Mid-Garts review (X68K) Reviewed on September 04, 2005 Lightning flashed across the screen, volcanoes erupted in the background, laser beams blocked my way, fiery chimerae hurtled through the air, orcs tossed hammers from below, and gigantic rocks tried to squish poor me (and my dragon). The boring game from the first level had suddenly developed an imagination — I now had a reason to keep playing.
	Shienryu review (SAT) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 Even thinking about the genre-defining Thunder Force IV was more exciting than playing this, the most forgettably average vertical shooter ever created.
	Strikers 1945 Plus review (ARC) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 Over the past few years there has been a void in my gamer soul where the shooters used to be. I felt destined to be counted among the lost; that vast pool of estranged old-schoolers, disenchanted by style-over-substance shooters, and forever reminiscing about Konami codes and R-Type machines at the mall. It seems my salvation has come, and it appeared as a simple airplane. No advanced spacecraft, heat-seeking lasers, or physics defying maneuvers. Just propellers and a machine gun.
	Gradius III review (SNES) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 An aspect commonly overlooked in classic gaming is how solitary the experience is. Like lonely teenagers in a basement, the heroes of Super Mario Brothers and Sonic the Hedgehog work in complete isolation. While they may be working to save the world, there is little representation of this in their respective games. Outside of fun, the only reward for playing is rescuing pixelated princesses and fuzzy animals. These games rely solely on the strength of their gameplay to attract ...
	Dangerous Seed review (GEN) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 I’m not amused.
	The Sims review (PC) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 I don’t get it. I don’t think I’ll ever get it. What the hell is so fun about watching someone else live their life? Why are we obsessed with reality shows like “Hogan Knows Best”, “Nick And Jessica” and “The Osbournes”? Have we suddenly become so desperate to leave our own lives that we will blindly follow someone else’s? I can’t answer that question, I really can’t. So if you sit there and ask me “Why is The Sims so popular” or “Why are there so many expansion packs and sequels to this game” I...
	Viewpoint review (GEN) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 Since the Genesis is home to a bijillion shoot-em-ups, it really takes something interesting to make one of these titles stand out from the crowd; Divine Sealing has a "women feel pain when their clothes get removed" gimmick, Metallic Uniframe Super Hybrid Armor has whatever the hell that game was known for, and in this case, Viewpoint has a unique perspective. Unfortunately, this game's selling point ends up screwing with the gameplay, making a rather average shoot-em-up pr...
	Whip Rush 2222 AD review (GEN) Reviewed on September 01, 2005 If you want to give Renovation credit for one thing when they released Whip Rush 2222 A.D. for the Genesis in 1990, praise them for knowing how to copy from good games.
	The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction review (GCN) Reviewed on September 01, 2005 He is the most physically powerful being ever imagined, the living embodiment of mortal strength. Not faster than a speeding bullet, but far more powerful than a locomotive, and capable of leaping miles in a single bound. His enemies are legion; as strong as they are numerous, infinitely persistent. But never enough. Before him, people flee. Behind him, cities crumble. Not a villain, not a hero, not anything in between. He is a force of nature given flesh. Random. Fierce. Unstoppable. Irresistib...
	Axelay review (SNES) Reviewed on August 31, 2005 When it comes to this genre, I can safely say that I am no expert. Taking advice from veterans and shooter connoisseurs and after being chronically depressed by the marathon levels in Space Megaforce, I came across Laxe.
	KISS Psycho Circus: The Nightmare Child review (DC) Reviewed on August 31, 2005 Now take a second to reflect; someone out there thought it would be a good idea to take an aging rock band and throw them into a video game. Consider with horror the fate we would suffer if this trend would have caught on. Ziggy Stardust's Pro Skateboarding would be a hit, equalled only by QueenFighter II.
	Riviera: The Promised Land review (GBA) Reviewed on August 28, 2005 Riviera: The Promised Land was one of the most kick-ass games ever released on the underachieving WonderSwan Crystal. Its GBA incarnation features loads of new voices (that's good) and majorly cutified character designs (that's bad), but otherwise it's a byte-by-byte port of the original. In other words, Riviera's still (almost) as awesome as it ever was.
	Pac 'n Roll review (DS) Reviewed on August 26, 2005 When you swipe the stylus across the screen, his counterpart in the top screen will move a bit. If you repeatedly make quick but short strokes, he’ll sort of wander about as desired. Swift and longer brushes, particularly those executed in a gattling-gun sort of sense, will send him flying along the various ledges and hills and whatever else is in sight. That’s almost all there is to controlling Pac-Man. Almost.
	Secret Scout in the Temple of Demise review (NES) Reviewed on August 26, 2005 You find yourself in a dense jungle, just one pudgy little boy scout all alone. Walking along, you see a lone savage, crouching atop a temple. He lunges at you, knife in hand. Your only hope is to stave him off with your kung fu knowledge, kicking him mercilessly until he falls. But beware, as some, um, things are flying at you as well. I think they're traffic cones. Skillfully weave your way through these hazardous safety cones and destroy the vile savage. Free to move onward, you find a...
	Dash Galaxy in the Alien Asylum review (NES) Reviewed on August 26, 2005 I laughed when I first saw the box art to this game. Hopefully most of you know of Flash Gordon, the old pulp sc-fi hero who fought Ming the Merciless and the subject of a 1980 movie. This movie is, objectively, rather poor, but is still incredibly fun to watch. You can't help but smile at the horrid lines ("What do you mean, 'Flash Gordon approaching?'"), the hammed up acting, the blatant 1950s look, the brilliant cheesy yet heart pounding theme song, and the goofy plot. Well, it's obvious ...
	Conker: Live & Reloaded review (XBX) Reviewed on August 25, 2005 Conker: Live and Reloaded will be a real treat for those who dug his original N64 outing. I never played it but I was hounded constantly about its hilarious take on adult themes in a cartoon like environment. Due to my uncaring attitude towards the N64, I never experienced the original Conker for myself and for years was barraged by my sixty-four fan friends about how great Conker’s Bad Fur Day was. I won’t lie, placing adult themes and situations in a cartoon world is a rather original conce...
	Bio-Hazard Battle review (GEN) Reviewed on August 25, 2005 Inverting Expectations

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