Review Archives (All Reviews)

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Available Reviews
	Theme Park Roller Coaster review (PS2) Reviewed on March 21, 2006 I’m not a big fan of simulators. Video games are supposed to be a release from the stresses of everyday life. They’re supposed to be a virtual vacation or a wonderful fantasy where you can step into the shoes of someone you may never be. It shouldn’t be a look into the seedy world of puke cleaning and ride repair. It’s why I didn’t like Theme Park: Roller Coaster. Well, that and a few more reasons…
	Lumines review (PSP) Reviewed on March 20, 2006 You’ll know when you’re there because your fingers will be moving as if they aren’t yours, and your score will be skyrocketing. You’ll be flicking tiles this way and that, dropping one in one place and hardly even noticing as it begins to flash because you’re already working with the next play.
	Age of Empires III review (PC) Reviewed on March 20, 2006 I play real-time strategy games like I used to play with Legos. I build up a lot of structures for no real reason whatsoever, then I pull them all apart and start over again. I have very little interest in combat in most RTS games. I just like building up cities and managing my populous, which most players consider the boring part of RTS games. Because of this, I’ve found a lot of the newer games disappointing because they’re so combat-oriented. Sure, micro-management isn’t always that fun, but ...
	Final Soldier review (TG16) Reviewed on March 20, 2006 I was disappointed to have to play through seven levels that didn't get challenging until the end neared. Enemies were only aggressive in a few parts of Final Soldier, while most bosses went down in flames before I got overwhelmed by their more proactive approach to solving the problem of “that gosh-durn little feller that keeps shooting me with the big green doohickeys”.
	Divine Sealing review (GEN) Reviewed on March 20, 2006 Divine Sealing is hilarious, but it’s not meant to be funny at all. In fact, the game contains no humorous qualities whatsoever. However, after you’ve driven yourself to the edge of sanity by ploughing through its offerings, you’ll find yourself laughing at a number of things. You’ll snigger at how the game tries to fuse two opposing genres together and fails on both levels, you’ll giggle at the game’s pathetic attempt to bring hentai to a home console and lastly, you’ll smile over the fact that...
	Lemmings review (PSP) Reviewed on March 19, 2006 Admittedly then, expectations for the PSP update were low. How were Team 17 going to overcome the interface problem on a system notorious for its poor controls? Long answer made short: they didn't. Instead, a series of workarounds have been implemented to increase user-friendliness, though in doing so, some basic design issues have gone unchecked.
	The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past review (SNES) Reviewed on March 17, 2006 It’s hard to imagine that great fights against Turtle Rock’s three-headed dragon, the near-invulnerable Moldorm or evil ol’ Ganon, himself, could be in the same game as a giant moth whose main threat is caused by its good fortune to reside in a spike-laden room with a floor composed of conveyor belts. A handful of other bosses seem a bit redundant, as one seems little more than an enhanced version of the Patra mini-bosses in the original Legend of Zelda’s final dungeon, while the fight with Blink the Thief could best be described as a confrontation with a mobile Gleeok.
	Xenosaga Episode I: Der Wille zur Macht review (PS2) Reviewed on March 16, 2006 What we have here is a rare case; the only game I know capable of standing on a character and a setting. If the universe wasn’t so detailed and complete, if it wasn’t designed with such obvious care and forethought, if its plot wasn’t more gripping than many books or movies, and if KOS-MOS didn’t kick such ungodly amounts of ass, Xenosaga Episode I: Dur Wille Zer Macht would suck. Beyond those elements, there’s little to like.
	Black review (XBX) Reviewed on March 16, 2006 As I walked away from a pile of fiery rubble with dead soldiers scattered about (originally a heavily-guarded canal), I heard the darnedest thing come out of my guy's mouth:
	HSX: HyperSonic.Xtreme review (PS2) Reviewed on March 15, 2006
	Kingdom Hearts review (PS2) Reviewed on March 15, 2006 I put off playing Kingdom Hearts for three years. When it finally wandered into my collection, my brother asked how I—a person who considers Metallica soft rock and thinks watching Ultimate Fighter is a good way to relax—could play Kingdom Hearts. Eyes red, fingers blistered and zombified from a lack of sleep. That’s how I played it. I seriously couldn’t put it down. I don’t know how this game escaped my attention for three long years, nor am I sure if the friend who lent it to me will ever get ...
	MS Saga: A New Dawn review (PS2) Reviewed on March 12, 2006 When it comes to anime, people have different ways of expressing their love. Some cosplay, some create fansites, and some draw parodies. SD Gundam was originally intended as an all-out parody of the super-serious Gundam series. SD Gundam was so popular that it eventually took on a life of its own and spawned an entire line of toys, television shows, and video games. MS Saga is one of those games.
	F-Zero GX review (GCN) Reviewed on March 12, 2006 I don't care too much for racing games. I have a car; why would I need to pretend to have a different one? However, my car can't break the sound barrier. Nor can it hover above roads that twist, defy gravity, or are built miles above the Earth. So while Gran Turismo would make me yawn, F-Zero always piques my interest. Not only is it different in terms of style, but different in terms of gameplay. Nintendo and Sega, thankfully, understood this, and it shows in F-Zero GX. Fast, furious, an...
	Shadow Hearts From the New World review (PS2) Reviewed on March 12, 2006 There’s another change: From the New World is the first in the series to abandon plot-fertile Europe in favor of the Americas. Some people suppose that means “the United States,” but that’s not entirely true. While you will visit places like Chicago, Vegas and New York (and even the Grand Canyon), you’ll also witness destinations beyond US borders. One such place is the Caribbean, where you’ll encounter a band of pirates that hang out near a haunted ship.
	Every Party review (X360) Reviewed on March 12, 2006 Okamoto's desire to broaden the market through accessibility was noble, it's just a shame he selected a console that's been solely embraced by a minor sub-culture of die-hard enthusiasts.
	Psychic Detective review (PSX) Reviewed on March 11, 2006 I had this plan for a review, and it was going to be great. See, what I was going to do was write an intro on how I've played an AWESOME point 'n' click game. One so spectacular that I had to write a review on it because not sharing this masterpiece WITH THE WORLD would have made me selfish and possessive. Then I was going to work in a direct link to my Broken Sword review using my limited knowledge of HTML coding. Hohoho.
	Star Ocean: Till the End of Time review (PS2) Reviewed on March 10, 2006 But, see, everything else about the game is sub-par at best. It’s a perfect example of what an RPG shouldn’t do.
	Pride FC: Fighting Championships review (PS2) Reviewed on March 09, 2006 In the past, MMA has always been viewed as a violent and barbaric sport, but with its new breed of fighters and an increase in popularity has brought the sport to the spotlight. Even though MMA is superior to boxing in many regards, boxing continues to dominate as the most popular fighting sport. MMA has it all, bone crushing knees, arm breaking submissions, vicious slams, deadly kicks, and jaw dropping techniques. Put a boxer in a street fight with a MMA fighter, and the boxer will lose the m...
	Zunou Senkan Galg review (NES) Reviewed on March 09, 2006 To be honest, I got my first hint that Galg might become a thorn in my side as soon as I started up the game. As the first level began, I was informed I must collect 100 parts to destroy someone or something known as Dragg. Not five parts, not 10....but 100! But that's only a harbinger of the true horrors that were yet to come....
	Arabian Fight review (ARC) Reviewed on March 08, 2006 When compared to greats such as Streets of Rage 2 or The Punisher, Arabian Fight just doesn’t make cut. It tries very hard to push forward new graphical innovation that, to be fair, are rather original for its time but falls completely short by giving us fighting engine so basic that it makes the original Golden Axelook like Forgotten Realms: The Demon Stone.

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