Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	Zombi review (AMIGA) Reviewed on August 13, 2006 Just like every other right-thinking individual, I eagerly anticipate the day/night/nuclear winter when the infernal legions of darkness rise up from their graves in order to crush the living beneath their desiccated heels. Hence the most noteworthy thing about this game is that it’s essentially George Romero’s classic Dawn of the Dead adapted into a graphic adventure.
	Super Mario Bros. review (NES) Reviewed on August 13, 2006 The year is 1985, the Nintendo Entertainment System has just launched on North American Shores, and with it Mario becomes the most popular videogame hero. When the game first came out I wasn’t born yet, so I didn’t get to experience the adventure until 1995. Thankfully, it was worth the wait Super Mario Brothers is one of the best games ever made.
	Uno review (X360) Reviewed on August 13, 2006 It seems that as I age, my fingers become more restless and a bit slow, thus making games a wonderful hell of frustration and agony. It doesn’t matter how big that hole in my wall from my controller is, aggravation overwhelms me. Lucky for me, UNO always allays my troublesome game experiences.
	NFL Blitz review (N64) Reviewed on August 13, 2006 Tired of slower-paced, graphically-accurate football games like Madden? Want to play the sport and have a bit more fun with it also? This is Blitz, where you don't have to know a thing about the game of football, hell, you could even hate the sport, and you could still have serious fun. It takes the real deal, then removes all the penalties and rules that slow it down. Plus it adds huge muscles, attitude, and then speeds everything up twofold.
	Painkiller: Hell Wars review (XBX) Reviewed on August 12, 2006 Painkiller: Hell Wars bothers me. It bothers me because it’s not a good game. It isn’t. A lot of people will tell you that it’s great, but it isn’t. Painkiller: Hell Wars casts you as Daniel Garner, a man sent to purgatory after a car accident. He then becomes an exterminator of hell’s worst demons and that’s the last of the story. This is a straight-forward, run into an area, blast all the cannon-fodder enemies that pop up in front of you, and then run through the next door and do the same thin...
	Indigo Prophecy review (PS2) Reviewed on August 12, 2006 Sometimes making the wrong decision leads to a setback, a step missed along the way. Sometimes it leads into a side story you wouldn’t have noticed otherwise, like a quaint night of ice-skating between two friends. Sometimes it leads to a game over. The roads diverge, cross, and one of Indigo Prophecy’s biggest appeals is that it encourages experimentation.
	Prey review (X360) Reviewed on August 11, 2006 Prey's basic concept, which most players have seen five or six times before, is this: a reluctant hero has been sucked into battle against homicidal aliens! A mysterious, metallo-organic sphere hovers above the Earth, ripping entire chunks of the planet apart and dumping civilians into harvesting machines (reminiscent of War of the Worlds). With his girlfriend's life at stake, without any friends by his side, Cherokee Tommy — the hero — must creep his way through a bunch of linear levels to put an end to the alien menace.
	Brain Age: Train Your Brain in Minutes a Day review (DS) Reviewed on August 11, 2006 The words "education" and "entertainment" usually don't belong together. So when we call Oregon Trail, Reading Rabbit, and Math Blaster "edutainment" software, heads start to turn; even more so for Brain Age: Train Your Brain in Minutes a Day!, since (besides the long name) it targets more than children. Brain Age dreams of DS lovers walking down the street playing mental exercises that supposedly improve your practical intelligence. Supervisor and prominent Ja...
	Secret Scout in the Temple of Demise review (NES) Reviewed on August 11, 2006 There are some games where the beginning of the game is really awful, but then later on the story gets whipped into shape or you get used to slightly sloppy controls and see that other aspects of the game aren't so bad. Very rarely will you see a game like this that is just so many synonyms of bad from the beginning until the end, or however far you can get.
	Feel the Magic: XY/XX review (DS) Reviewed on August 11, 2006 Sometimes, I feel that launch games are just there to test a machine's capabilities and how the public will react to it. I feel that these games are somewhat entertaining, but not "complete". There's a missing element in some of these launch games that makes them feel more like a test than a game that's meant to keep you entertained for a long time. This is how I felt about Feel the Magic.
	Metroid Prime Pinball review (DS) Reviewed on August 11, 2006 What sounds more insipid than a primitive pinball machine that creaks and groans, tantalizing you with its boringly enticing gameplay, simplistic concept, dry display and generally dull premise? Nothing, of course. But that doesn’t mean that a pinball game centered on the lively worlds of Metroid Prime can’t be a freaking riot to play.
	Restricted Area review (PC) Reviewed on August 10, 2006 Information exchanges hands like cash, body parts are put on the open market, and corporations hire mercenaries to do their bidding. As an outcast in an already downtrodden society, even you have signed your life away to the corporations with the slim hope of a brighter future.
	Planescape: Torment review (PC) Reviewed on August 10, 2006 Sigil is the City of Doors. It lies at the nexus of the multiverse; its portals touch countless worlds, and those with the correct keys can reach anywhere from Sigil. To the rest, it’s a prison. It floats above the infinitely tall Spire in the center of the Outlands, a neutral zone between the Outer Planes of good and evil, law and chaos. It’s indifferent to outside conflicts, its impartiality guarded by the Lady of Pain, an enigmatic sorceress who wears a bladed mask.
	AstroPop review (X360) Reviewed on August 10, 2006 AstroPop is a puzzle game for Xbox Live Arcade that combines block busting, combos, bricks, and SUPA rays. Its hectic pace and points scores make it addictive, and cause you to not notice the time slipping by. AstroPop is constantly making you navigate quickly and work rapidly. It’s a great single-player puzzle game, but its lack of multiplayer takes away a lot from the experience.
	Metal Saga review (PS2) Reviewed on August 10, 2006 Humanity. Like cockroaches, they continue to scrape out what meager existence they can in the post-apocalyptic world wrought by the hands of NOAH, the obligatory evil super-computer. Initially an artificial intelligence created in order to prevent war and the like from ravaging the land, NOAH was given a little too much freedom of choice. In order to cease war and end all hostilities, it would eradicate the source of all conflict: the entirety of the human race! Through hazy and unexplai...
	Silent Hill 4: The Room review (XBX) Reviewed on August 10, 2006 Know from the start that every glimpse of promise, every flicker of macabre brilliance and every fleeting second of spine-chilling horror will crash and burn, leaving only a lingering air of disappointment and wasted potential. Because from the second the game starts, so does its biggest flaw.
	Street Fighter II Hyper Fighting review (X360) Reviewed on August 09, 2006 Hyper Fighting is a ballbuster. It's cheap, relentless, and annoyingly obsessed with cheesing you to death with its flawless timing and flaw-exploiting tactics. In short, I finally hate a version of Street Fighter II.
	Space Empires IV review (PC) Reviewed on August 09, 2006 If you're the type of person who would look at a title like "Space Empires IV" and think, "O GAWD how lame! I'm not playing THAT!", then you, sir, are missing out. If you are, then you might also be the type of person who would look at a review like "Don't judge a book by its cover" and think "O GAWD how lame! I'm not reading THAT!", and...oh. Nuts.
	Pac-Man review (X360) Reviewed on August 09, 2006 Blinky is riding you like a cowboy on a bronco and you’re doomed if you don’t reach the side warp in time. Every millisecond counts. You round a bend and you need to head left for safety, so you press the button. What happens on-screen? Pac-Man moves down.
	ICO review (PS2) Reviewed on August 09, 2006 Forbidding battlements rise above a stark ravine. The stillness of the surrounding forest is broken by the sound of approaching hooves. A group of horsemen appears, masked and silent, carrying with them a struggling young boy. His wrists are bound and two curved horns jut from his head. Wordlessly, the horsemen enter the fortress. They bring the boy to a cavernous hall lined with stone sarcophagi. One casket opens and the boy is placed inside. There is the sound of receding footsteps and then h...

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