Review Archives (All Reviews)
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Deus Ex: Invisible War review (PC)Reviewed on July 24, 2008I've waited years for a videogame to truly treat me as an adult, and finally one has arrived. Ignore the silver science-fiction: beneath that is a truly poignant look at society, terror and corruption. The non-linearity is so all encompassing that you can choose your side right from the beginning. Much of the game will play out very similarly either way, but your approach to it, and the tale you uncover, will be very much different. |
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Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift review (DS)Reviewed on July 23, 2008Luso Clemens has a problem. Several, actually. Thanks to his inability to sit still, he’s earned the ire of every parent and teacher who’s ever had to deal with him. He’s been tardy and disruptive so many times that he’s gotten himself a detention on the last day of class. Given his insatiable curiosity and short attention span, it’s surprising that he can even make it to the library to serve his punishment. It’s not like he spends his detention sitting around in quiet remorse over his blunders,... |
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Namco X Capcom review (PS2)Reviewed on July 23, 2008The majority of strategy RPGs have one major factor in common: they all tell touching stories of war-torn lands. Be it the powerful, albeit poorly-translated tale of Final Fantasy Tactics; the personable adventures in the Fire Emblem series that allow you to fall in love with each and every character; or even the hallowed Shining Force games, fallen from grace as they are today like all of SEGA's once-greats, the stories keep you motivated, and keep you playing. |
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Divine Sealing review (GEN)Reviewed on July 23, 2008Sometimes, when I get a boner, I thrust my hands down into my pants to make it go away. |
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Alien Syndrome review (WII)Reviewed on July 23, 2008My Arcade Action Extra magazine from 1988 features an Alien Syndrome spread packed with gameplay tips and outrageously exciting screenshots for what was the then new coin-op from Sega. Two decades later I find myself playing a makeover of this outer space answer to Gauntlet on a motion-sensing console made by Nintendo. How times change. |
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Shadowrun review (GEN)Reviewed on July 21, 2008Let us speak of Shadowrun. |
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Virtua Fighter CG Portrait Series Vol. 1: Sarah Bryant review (SAT)Reviewed on July 20, 2008The next shot is of her abandoned beech-towel and parasol. I start rooting for Sarah, hoping she can get away! She fails. We find her slinging a pair of flowers over her shoulder and snarling at the screen. Some people might mistake it for a light-hearted grin but, by now, we know better. |
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Prism: Light the Way review (DS)Reviewed on July 20, 2008 |
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Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines review (PC)Reviewed on July 18, 2008The Vampire RPG mythology is applied flawlessly here, the politically charged 'vampire subculture' backdrop providing for one of the most fabulously realised videogame narratives we've had the pleasure of experiencing in years. It starts with a murder, as many good stories do, and it leads on a spectacular voyage of mystery, dark secrets, an enormous and seductively gritty underworld and a struggle for supremacy between a group of equally corrupt and equally power-hungry fiends. This is the first, and perhaps most interesting, way in which Bloodlines stands out from the crowd of interactive fiction. On the surface, it's a game about vampires. But it doesn't take long to realise that, really, this is a game about life, about people, and about the ways in which we behave based on our beliefs, our morals, our experiences and our social standings. |
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Assassin's Creed review (PS3)Reviewed on July 17, 2008You know when someone asks you how your day was, and you want to tell them how great it was, but actually it's been a pretty miserable day? You're stuck trying to come up with something to tell them that's good, something other than "I've got a wicked case of Jock Rot" or "my pet rock died." You need a stand in. For me, the stand in of the last week has been Assassin's Creed. |
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Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles - Ring of Fates review (DS)Reviewed on July 15, 2008One time, I had a girlfriend. |
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Great War Nations: The Spartans review (PC)Reviewed on July 15, 2008In all, this is hardly a Hellish game. It throws in some really interesting mechanics (backed by opponents willing to make use of them at every opportunity) that makes Hellas interesting and that little more closer to the ideal strategy experience. |
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Advanced Busterhawk Gley Lancer review (GEN)Reviewed on July 15, 2008With a spelling error in the title, a domicile on a sometimes technically inept console, and membership in a genre that prides itself on redundancy, expectations are not particularly high for Gley Lancer. “A shoot-em-up,” said I, “on the Mega Drive no less! I look forward to the suicidal alien pilots, ear-bleeding music, grainy graphics, and a selection of generic weapons ranging from lasers to different color lasers to bullets that fire so fast that they are actually just a different k... |
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The Lost Cases of Sherlock Holmes review (PC)Reviewed on July 14, 2008Aside from the first case, which is complete filler in my opinion, the sixteen mysteries presented here are genuinely interesting. Examples include a man who takes off in a hot air balloon and crash lands after a dagger somehow finds its way into his back, a man who collapses in botanical gardens after suffering from a potentially fatal bee sting, a jewel theft on a speeding train and so forth. |
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The Getaway review (PS2)Reviewed on July 14, 2008Multiple accidents and numerous carjackings later, you’ll find the gang’s hideaway. There you have to kill everybody while seeking the child’s location. Accomplish this and you’ll be rewarded with another lengthy cut scene where you learn that Mark is in way over his head. Blackmailed by Bethnal Green boss, Charlie Jolson, and his henchmen, Hammond is forced to obey the man’s every whim or else lose his boy forever. |
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LostWinds review (WII)Reviewed on July 13, 2008It’s so easy to take for granted. The wind, I mean. Science explains it as the reaction to pressure between two adjacent air masses. Nothing more, nothing less. But for the folks that have a bit more imagination within their grasp, the wind can be mysterious and otherworldly. You can’t see it, but its presence is all too clear. It could be that slight breeze tickling the back of your neck in the early morning. Or maybe it’s that sudden burst of air that sends you a face-full of raindrops during ... |
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Blast Works: Build, Trade, Destroy review (WII)Reviewed on July 13, 2008The main hook in the campaign and arcade modes is the ability to attract debris to your ship and use it to your advantage. Anything you destroy within a stage (except for the boss) can be pulled to your ship and will stay with you until it has received too much damage and fallen away or until you clear a given mission. The whole process occurs automatically without any special button presses. |
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Half-Life 2: Episode Two review (PC)Reviewed on July 12, 2008Nearly every sequence takes you by surprise, and keeps you glued to the screen until the action is resolved. There is a helicopter chase. There is also a genuinely horrifying introduction to the Advisor, the only “true” Combine creature we’ve seen so far. Trusty robotic ally Dog has his moment in the sun, only before you finally reach White Forest and come to the realization that the game isn’t over yet – in fact, the most intense, exhilarating, large-scale battle the Half-Life series has ever seen is still just around the bend. |
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X-Men: Mutant Academy review (GBC)Reviewed on July 12, 2008Button mashing will see you through every battle, even at the highest difficulty. There’s no real system of commands that demand mastering. Just back your enemy to the end of the screen and wail away. They’ll be caught in a trap of constant abuse in which they can scarcely land a hit, one in which escape is impossible save for jumping. But they’re often too stupid for that. |
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Devil May Cry 4 review (PC)Reviewed on July 11, 2008The Devil May Cry series hasn't exactly been consistent. While the original game was a unique and ultra-stylish masterpiece, the second outing was a universally reviled mess. The third game had the gameplay back on track, but was deemed too tricky by all but the most hardcore of action fans. It turns out that the fourth time's the charm, because Devil May Cry 4 is as good as the self-proclaimed "hard stylish action" franchise has ever been. |
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