Review Archives (All Reviews)
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Retro Game Challenge review (DS)Reviewed on March 03, 2009Nostalgia is a powerful thing. It strikes when you least suspect it, in that one, awe-inspiring moment in which you realize what you’ve forgotten. What you’ve left behind. Sure, you might be immersed in some hundred-hour RPG, or slaughtering random baddies with your huge arsenal of high-tech weapons. You enjoy what the current generation of games can offer you. There’s nothing wrong with that; gaming has come a long way in the last twenty years. If you’re old enough, you can appreciate such adva... |
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Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers review (WII)Reviewed on March 03, 2009Slaying is such a guilty pleasure. Really, it is. You might deny it, claim that you derive pleasure from something more intellectually stimulating. Something nicer. But once you’ve gotten a taste, it’s hard to stop. It’s beautiful, mesmerizing in its own disturbing way; the blood doesn’t just seep out, but gushes forth in a glorious fountain of gore. The dismembered limbs don’t just fall away, but go flying across the room and leave splattered trails in their wakes. The heads are especial... |
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Hello Kitty's Cube Frenzy review (PSX)Reviewed on March 03, 2009HELLO KITTY |
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Resident Evil: Code Veronica X review (PS2)Reviewed on March 02, 2009When it comes to Resident Evil, I openly admit to being a fanboy. I buy the comics, the toys, the skins and any other gimmick I can find; most of it in anticipation for Resident Evil 5. I’m so eager, in fact, that I was willing to play Code Veronica based solely on a rumor that it contained a very short—albeit significant—plot revelation for the upcoming RE 5. |
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Prinny: Can I Really Be the Hero? review (PSP)Reviewed on March 01, 2009Rather than working to avoid such situations, the developers do their best to replicate them numerous times throughout each zone. Stages seem to have been built specifically to trick you into making mistakes. You'll find moving platforms that look like they should require a double jump, only to to realize too late that they actually don't. Or you'll leap across a wide gap only to immediately run into a wall of waiting projectiles that you couldn't possibly have anticipated. Fireballs often come out of nowhere. Enemies materialize from thin air. Monsters float down from above when you had no idea they were even there. Too much of the experience comes down to tedious trial and error. |
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Flower review (PS3)Reviewed on March 01, 2009The whole thing comes off as an interactive Fantasia: a beautiful and poignant blend of sound and movement that tells an active story. |
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Street Fighter IV review (PS3)Reviewed on February 27, 2009Though I didn't find a convenient way to determine a competitor's skill level until after he beats me—or loses—that didn't actually work out too badly. I'm someone who likes to get right into another round of fighting, anyway, and the current system makes that easy to do. Besides that, lag is minimal. I've played quite a few matches and only once did I find things lagging. Really, the only complaint I have with online is the obvious one: scrubs. I don't mind that people almost always fight using Ryu, Ken or Sagat (I like some of those guys myself), but some players try to play mind games. |
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Deadly Creatures review (WII)Reviewed on February 27, 2009Similar to Super Mario Galaxy, Deadly Creatures will take you through each desert environment in ways you never imagined. Walls are so easily traversed that you may begin to lose track of your surroundings. This illusion is broken – beautifully and sometimes hauntingly – when fighting an opponent that suddenly loses his grip and falls off what appeared to be solid ground. |
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X-Blades review (PS3)Reviewed on February 27, 2009Ayumi has to be somebody's wet dream. The press releases talk-up the sexy art style, and emphasize how both action and anime fans will slobber over her figure and fighting moves. And no doubt, some people will be drawn to her brash attitude. But the girl can only take the game so far, and she's been outfitted in a stagnant ensemble. |
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Skies of Arcadia review (DC)Reviewed on February 26, 2009A game doesn't necessarily have to do anything different to be a good one. While many tout games such as Donkey Konga or Rez for their "innovations", they forget that a simply yet expertly crafted game almost always ends up offering more beef than these so-called breaths of fresh air. Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Metroid, Doom; many of the games considered to be revolutionary classics never really revolutionized anything at all, polishing their wheels to a perfect shine as opposed to reinventing t... |
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Sonic's Ultimate Genesis Collection review (X360)Reviewed on February 25, 2009As a compilation, Sega Mega Drive Ultimate Collection has several flaws. |
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Leather Goddesses of Phobos review (APP2)Reviewed on February 25, 2009While "Tame" doesn't allow even remotely suggestive language, in "Lewd", anything goes. Sexual encounters are spelled out and dirty language is recognized by the computer. Obviously, that was the only mode I ever played, although, upon further review, the sex scenes aren't any more titillating than those in the average romance novel read by bored housewives looking for any sort of release from day-to-day life with their unemployed husband who just drank himself to sleep in front of the television yet again. |
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Quest 64 review (N64)Reviewed on February 24, 2009The Nintendo 64 has only one great RPG, and it is not Quest 64. |
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The King of Fighters Collection: The Orochi Saga review (WII)Reviewed on February 23, 2009...all of the games are emulated wonderfully - without any sound problems that sometimes plague compilation discs. |
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DJ Max Portable Emotional Sense - Clazziquai Edition review (PSP)Reviewed on February 22, 2009Face it, DJ Max is too tough for you. The twitch rhythm game's reputation is based on insane difficulty. For normal people, the highest eight-button setting exceeds impossibility. Six-button mode merely approaches that insurmountable level. Five-button mode, meant as a baby-step in training, brings its own hindrance: as the fifth button can be covered by either hand. Even four-buttons, the absolute floor, can produce anguish on the tougher songs. So consider DJ Max Portable Emoti... |
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Burnout Paradise review (X360)Reviewed on February 22, 2009If anyone has read my regular articles as of late, you would know that the reason this review has been put off for so long is because of my wife and her obsession with giving gifts for Valentine's Day. So anyway, without further adieu, I give you the review of Burnout: Paradise for the 360. |
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Tony Hawk's Proving Ground review (PS3)Reviewed on February 22, 2009I finally got myself a PS3 about a week back and boy what sound investment that was. For a mere 350 Duckets I got a PS3, a controller, a copy of Warhawk, a Bluetooth headset, and a copy of Proving Ground. |
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Lost Odyssey review (X360)Reviewed on February 22, 2009Since the last game I reviewed was the religious equivalent to a Strawberry Shortcake that was prepared by Jesus himself, I figured this time I would go with a game that can be best described as shit covered shit with shit filling. Now before I start tearing in to the aforementioned fecal pastry, I'd like all of you to know that I typically like (read: worship) Japanese Role-Playing games and are usually impressed and utterly moved by the emotions that their story tends to offer. That being said... |
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Spelunky [Freeware] review (PC)Reviewed on February 22, 2009Challenging, addictive, thoughtful and beautiful, Spelunky is a stream of constant delight. The icing on the cake is that it's free, and a mere 8mb download. There are no excuses not to play this. You have been warned. |
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Deus Ex: Invisible War review (PC)Reviewed on February 20, 2009I suppose it’s unfair to expect anything to be as deep, involving, and utterly groundbreaking as Deus Ex, a game that is frequently imitated but seldom equaled. What’s interesting is that its sequel, Deus Ex: Invisible War, was also developed by Ion Storm, and headed by many of the same individuals (I checked), yet it still feels like the kind of pale mimicry that would come from a team alien to this sort of thing, who understand where they’re going but have no idea how to get ther... |
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