Review Archives (All Reviews)

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Available Reviews
	Naughty Bear review (X360) Reviewed on July 07, 2010 Each new weapon has a kill animation to go with it, but none of those animations are all that amusing after the first three or four times that you see them. I enjoy pouncing on an over-sized bear and hacking apart his face with an ax as much as the next guy, but the game's cover artwork looks substantially more depraved than the final product actually feels. Where's the crimson, or at least a cloud of puff? These are the blandest ax murders you'll ever see, hands down. Unless you're switching weapons constantly (and perhaps even then), you could easily tire of the animations before you even finish the first of the game's many repetitive stages.
	Myst review (PSP) Reviewed on July 06, 2010 This is a bad port. It’s not broken, like Syberia DS, or a drastic departure from the original, like Deus Ex: The Conspiracy. It is pointless, though. Helplessly pointless. I can’t figure out the rationale behind releasing it. Midway Games has taken an ancient game, rereleased it in the wrong aspect ratio on a tinier screen, and shoved in a level from the last full remake of the game... a remake which f...
	Heavy Rain review (PS3) Reviewed on July 06, 2010 It was destined for debate the moment it hit shelves—or perhaps even prior. A game that isn’t a game at all, described by its own designers as “an interactive drama” where the player takes complete control, even over the most menial of tasks like drinking orange juice or shaving. Some may see it as brilliant, others may call it foolish but I don’t think any can argue that Heavy Rain was one of a kind.
	Puzzle Quest 2 review (X360) Reviewed on July 04, 2010 Puzzle Quest brought together two genres – puzzle and RPG – and made them work so well that we all asked “why hasn’t this been done before?” Three years and a poorly received spin-off (Puzzle Quest: Galactrix) later and the big question is whether or not the formula holds up. It does, but rather than refine what the original offered and streamline the experience, Puzzle Quest 2’s real improvement is in its presentation (which ironically creates some new problems).
	Dante's Inferno review (PS3) Reviewed on July 03, 2010 So here’s what happened. Someone at EA noticed that the God of War games are incredibly successful, both commercially and critically. They noticed that those games are rife with excessive gore and nudity, that they unfold in busy set pieces accompanied by shrieking choirs and wailing strings on the soundtrack, and that they’re chock full of very angry men making very loud exclamations. Let’s do that, they said. People seem to like that.
	Sam & Max: They Stole Max's Brain! review (PC) Reviewed on July 03, 2010 Here, he needs to disturb an alliance between previous chapter’s villains using chicanery and random vandalism, while disembodied Max, his brain kept snug in a sealed jar, complete with electronic voice box and L.E.D mouth, antagonizes all around him out of sheer boredom.
	Jets'n'Guns review (PC) Reviewed on July 02, 2010 "(...)a direct link to a TV channel that will buy and broadcast the most entertaining massacres that happen around you. On a signpost on the way to the space-sector you can read: "No nuclear weapon tests between 08.00 and 16.00". It is probably too much to ask for".
	Super Mario 64 review (N64) Reviewed on July 02, 2010 A long time ago, in a far away kingdom filled with mushroom hill tops, green pipes, and coins as far as the eye can see, there was a man named Mario. This plumber, sporting a killer mustache, overalls, and a red hat, time and time again saved the Mushroom Kingdom from the diabolical Bowser, a towering turtle that has a huge obsession with kidnapping a princess. Mario had plenty of help during these adventures, but that didn't seem to matter to him, since he was so intent on hogging all the glory...
	Dragon Ball: Revenge of King Piccolo review (WII) Reviewed on July 02, 2010 Dragonball: Revenge of King Piccolo has some potential as a side-scrolling adventure, but some unfortunate stumbles prevent it from serving as the enjoyable introduction to the game franchise that it so easily could have been.
	Panzer Dragoon Saga review (SAT) Reviewed on July 01, 2010 I don’t know the name of this world, but it’s a bleak, somber wasteland hoping to get by on scraps left behind by a dead people. An advanced civilization known as The Ancients originally spanned the globe until it was destroyed by an unknown cataclysm years ago. Sparse nomadic tribes of humans band together in order to fend off vicious mutants that roam the lifeless hillsides and dead seas. An emerging civilization – The Empire – grows stronger by salvaging The Ancients’ God-like technology.
	Gang Wars review (ARC) Reviewed on July 01, 2010 What's harder to explain are the numerous other problems. Gang Wars is characterized by slack issues that have grown increasingly noticeable since the Prisoners of War codebase it probably leveraged. Animation is stilted and choppy with not enough frames per attack, and the frames loop through at incongruent rates, one player throwing a punch and back to normal stance while the other still has his head careened back after a blow to the jaw. GW excels relative to its peers at providing a variety of different attackers, but negates that success by stacking them anyway – the same sprite may only be used once, but when it is you’ll fight three of the same guy at the same time anyway.
	Final Fantasy XIII review (PS3) Reviewed on July 01, 2010 Square-Enix would love to create masterpieces of storytelling, if only the player and the whole gameplay aspect would stop getting in the way, which is why they are taking such drastic steps to phase them out. Final Fantasy XIII isn’t a roleplaying game, and perhaps calling it a game is stretching the definition too far.
	Split/Second review (PS3) Reviewed on July 01, 2010 Split/Second is what I would call a beautiful tragedy. It starts out memorable, and initially blew me away—as I imagine it did with so many others. With its tight controls, a wide array of vehicles and expansive, twisting tracks, it has a lot of things hard-core racing fans seek. It didn’t make the mistake most do of simply mirroring aspects from popular franchises without adding anything new that will entice loyal followers to jump ship.
	TwinBee 3: Poko Poko Dai Maou review (NES) Reviewed on July 01, 2010 In Detana!! TwinBee (aka: Bells & Whistles), the entire game exhibited the same sort of imagination these bosses did. There were floating cities, waterfalls in outer space and other enchanting sights to fly over. Here...there's a quintet of generic-looking backgrounds ranging from the mundane beach-and-water combo of the second stage to the atrocious checkerboard design of the final level.
	Beyond Good & Evil review (PS2) Reviewed on June 30, 2010 With her trusty camera, Jade must unravel the truth behind the invasion. Her evidence, much of it horrifying, easily reaches the masses, and their protesting increases with each new article she publishes. Her investigations into tightly guarded military compounds reveal the reality behind the propaganda war between the mysterious Alpha Sections and the so-called IRIS rebels.
	RISK: Factions review (X360) Reviewed on June 29, 2010 The "Factions" mode adds a few wrinkles to that classic formula. The maps that you'll explore are different, with special new attractions that give particular territories new value. For example, it's possible to lay siege to an island temple. Doing so means that during each turn that you hold that fortified position, you can choose a single one of your opponent's territories to convert to your own (along with any troops who happen to be stationed there). Just imagine the possibilities. Whoever has that temple has tremendous power, but the temple grounds are obviously going to be under constant attack.
	8-bit Girlfriend review (X360) Reviewed on June 29, 2010 8-bit Girlfriend is a paper thin joke that doesn’t even stay around long enough to wear out its welcome.
	Resident Evil 5: Untold Stories review (X360) Reviewed on June 27, 2010 Untold Stories, as a whole, is a fantastic package that allows you to experience both sides of Resident Evil 5‘s extremes in their very best light.
	The House of the Dead: Overkill review (WII) Reviewed on June 27, 2010 Headstrong Games definitely receives points for giving players a different presentation with The House of the Dead: Overkill, instead of playing it safe by following in the footsteps of its predecessors. That's not to say the previous titles had a bad style, but change is sometimes a good thing. You'll immediately pick up on it when the disc plays, starting up as if an old movie is beginning. This is complete with film scratch effects (that stay for the game's entirety), "Feature Presenta...
	Sin & Punishment: Star Successor review (WII) Reviewed on June 27, 2010 It's hard to do justice to the intensity and creativity of Successor to the Skies. All I can hope to do is to convince you that the foundations are in place and give you a mere glimpse of the imagination that flows through this title. If you’re even a little bit convinced then I urge you to go out and experience the insanity for yourself. Sin and Punishment: Successor to the Skies is exactly the game that people have in mind when they think of Treasure.

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