Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
	The 7th Saga review (SNES) Reviewed on November 03, 2010 Even on a system renowned for its expansive library of RPGs, successfully completing The 7th Saga is an unforgettable experience. Unfortunately this is solely due to its patently unfair difficulty, because the generic dungeons, incomprehensible abbreviations, and skeletal excuse for a plot would likely put everyone to sleep if all the random encounters weren't straight out of their darkest nightmares.
	Singularity review (X360) Reviewed on November 02, 2010 Let me set up Singularity’s opening sequence for you. The game is set in an alternate reality in which America and Russia are at war (obviously), and you’ve been sent to infiltrate a Soviet island on which our adversaries have been experimenting with a fictional ninety-ninth element called – get this – E99. Your helicopter crashes and you’re separated from your partner, and then, for some reason, you’re transported to a burning building in 1955. You pull a scientist to safety despite a sh...
	GBA Basketball Two on Two review (APP2) Reviewed on November 02, 2010 Shortly after my friend Aric pasted me in GBA Basketball Two-on-Two on his Apple IIgs--retribution for all the RPGs I'd solved--I found the IIe version cheap at Babbage's. I felt frugal--it probably didn't have all the extras, like the crowd that disappeared as it became doubtful I would avoid getting doubled up. But it had two-on-two play, which had to be a step up from the wonderful One on One, and the back-of-box blurbs seemed comparable, if the in-game pictures didn't. Jealousy...
	Championship Baseball review (APP2) Reviewed on November 01, 2010 "Adjust tint til blue field is green." That's the opening screen of Championship Baseball (CB,) with "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" blaring. I never bothered. Blue grass is just one of the things that aren't true to life in CB but are probably more fun. With only so much disk space, only the most exciting bits of baseball survive. You draft your own team complete with abilities that don't matter except for batting. You get to name everyone: eight fielders, three starting pitchers, two utility me...
	Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde review (NES) Reviewed on October 31, 2010 The game is both side scrolling action (word used loosely) and scrolling shooter rolled into one. You take control of both Jekyll and Hyde. Playing as the former is dull and boring, playing as the latter is frustrating and boring.
	Castlevania: Symphony of the Night review (PSX) Reviewed on October 31, 2010 Whether as a loving tribute to the series' glorious past or a striking declaration of its subsequent revival, Symphony of the Night will make any 2D enthusiast shed bloody tears of joy.
	Muscle March review (WII) Reviewed on October 31, 2010 You've likely seen the trailer for this game on a video website. You know, the one where a bunch of confusing sequences are tossed in your face while weird J-Pop music plays in the background? And there was this highly enthusiastic Japanese announcer constantly shouting, throwing in a few Engrish words every so often. I'm sure some of you blocked it out of your mind, but there were also a ton of happy, muscly men in thongs. One was sporting a killer mohawk. Another was wearing a top hat. There w...
	Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines review (PC) Reviewed on October 30, 2010 These aren't the sorts of vampires who constantly whine about their lost humanity or take annoying teenage princesses to the prom. We're talking about hard-drinking and even harder-dying undead anarchists packing UZIs who'd just as soon rip your head off and use it to shoot hoops in the dirty, haunted streets of downtown Los Angeles, except that kind of thing always gets the elders' velvety cloaks in a bunch.
	Mr. Do! review (A2600) Reviewed on October 30, 2010 Mr. Do has to harvest cherries from his overgrown orchard. However, some Badguys (this is what the manual calls them) are out to not only horribly murder Do, but also eat his cherries. . Were they really that strapped for time? They couldn't have given the enemies a deeper collective name than that?
	Neutopia review (TG16) Reviewed on October 29, 2010 The Triforce doens't stand for this.
	Shin Megami Tensei review (SNES) Reviewed on October 29, 2010 For Kazuya, a perfectly ordinary Japanese youth, it had been a perfectly ordinary beginning to a perfectly ordinary day. Then his mom gets eviscerated by a demon from the rather similarly torn bowels of the underworld, he accidentally transmogrifies the faithful family hound into Cerberus, and the world ends.
	Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers review (PC) Reviewed on October 28, 2010 Whether in the role of silver-tongued conman or paranormal investigator, Gabriel Knight is definitely someone you'll want to know; his career might have begun just as the entire adventure genre was taking those first, faltering steps on its slow descent into irrelevance, but Sins of the Fathers masterfully demonstrates why Sierra On-Line once drove the computer industry.
	Haunted Casino review (SAT) Reviewed on October 27, 2010 These garments are handed over to the very approving imp in exchange for heaving stacks of chips nearly as abundant as those newly revealed pleasure globes until at last your bankrupt beauty goes down with a hilariously inept video of the poor lass being sucked into a black hole, presumably in search of some pants.
	Splatterhouse 2 review (GEN) Reviewed on October 26, 2010 The controls are stiffer than one of its endless supply of corpses, and the average level is a short, uninspired advance from left to right punching identical hordes of muck-encrusted undead while occasionally hopping over a hole in the floor. There's only one reason this cartridge wasn't totally lost to the shadows of mediocrity – it has enough gore to fill a swimming pool.
	Vampire Killer review (MSX) Reviewed on October 25, 2010 At a cursory glance it might even resemble a simple port, but this impression couldn't be more incorrect – Vampire Killer immediately stands out as a dramatic departure from the rest of the franchise even as its influence can be felt in Simon's Quest, Dracula X, and Symphony of the Night.
	Blake Stone: Aliens of Gold review (PC) Reviewed on October 24, 2010 Wolfenstein - Nazi + Aliens and overweight security guards = Blake Stone
	Blue Lacuna review (MAC) Reviewed on October 24, 2010 Don’t think that Blue Lacuna works simply because it doesn’t have graphics or a bunch of explosions, though. Not all Interactive Fiction can claim to have achieved what Blue Lacuna does. This isn’t some throwback to sensibilities that have long gone out of style. This isn’t typing “east, west, and open chest” in a meaningless dungeon romp with some comedy thrown in. This is serious writing. This is next generation programming. This is gaming that is inspirational and lasting.
	The House of the Dead 2 & 3 Return review (WII) Reviewed on October 24, 2010 There's a lot of whys when reacting to this particular release: Why not include the first game? Why these specific titles? Why the absurdly long name? Well, I'm guessing they simply used the Xbox versions, modified them a bit, and slapped them on a Wii disc. That would explain a whole lot... but since I've never touched the Xbox port, I could be waaaaaay off. As for the name, well, the name is just stupid, no matter how you spin it.
	X-Men review (ARC) Reviewed on October 24, 2010 Witness earthen bridges over lava fields lined with flame throwing hazards and enormous wasps that spew out a skull carved into a jungle cliff. Shotgun-toting Bonebreaker miniatures rove the inside of Magneto’s lair while stone statues carrying massive scythes animate deep in a ruin. While the dialog detracts from the production value – Magneto’s famous “Welcome to Die!” as he blasts apart a waterfall-side ledge just one egregious example – it is just as likely you find it kitschy as a fault. From crackling lightning in the backdrops to memorable scenes battling a crazed Nimrod as Kitty cowers bound behind an electromagnetic force field, the details go a long way in establishing the comic’s atmosphere.
	Tasty Planet: Back for Seconds review (PC) Reviewed on October 24, 2010 There’s a cleverness in the level design that helps extend the game’s brief lifespan.

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