Enough of the whiny "poor me" bullcrap. Today I'd like to bring up a subject that saiyanprince got me thinking about. How many games have utterly blown you away in the past that subsequently do not hold up over the years? An awful lot for me.

- Final Fantasy VII. I had never played a Final Fantasy title before this came out (much less a non-Zelda RPG), and coupled with the fact that it was my first PlayStation game, I had to pick my jaw off the floor when it started up. Gosh wow, FMV cutscenes! CD quality music! A really fucking huge sword! A heroine with boobies for the sake of boobies! My ten-year-old self was quite impressed.

Now when I replay it, I can only get past the first cloying exchange with Aeris before I have to turn it off. It's the first game that goes out of its way to emotionally manipulate you, and it falls flat on its face. Okay, she dies. I wasted all that time levelling up her dumb ass, and she gets shanked like a skinhead at Rikers. If I ever cried it was out of frustration.

Aside from the prerendered CG backgrounds, the graphics are abysmal. You can count the number of polygons on the character models. Aside from a stirring main theme, Uematsu's score is lacking in the depth of Final Fantasy VI. Half the characters are all but completely useless. A slot machine attack? Killer!!

We can attribute this game to the insurgence of sexually confused RPG heroes with troubled (vaguely homoerotic) pasts. While that's good ammo for joke reviews, it does nothing for me.

Why the hell was this revolutionary? It was in 3d? It had the balls to kill a main character 1/3 of the way in? Most uses of "shit" in a T-rated game? I think it's the first one. Hardly a reason to call this a classic.

- Myst. Playing this game made me feel like I was part of the intellegiste, like I was a discriminating game snob. Then I got frustrated and bought the strategy guide like everyone else.

Having to cheat in order to beat something shouldn't be required. But if you want to advance past the first disk, you need to plunk down an extra $20 or else you'll still be stuck at the first puzzle.

Once I knew what to do, I really felt like I was accomplishing stuff in the Myst universe! Solving endless puzzles that only occasionally make logical sense! Watching grainy live actors recite crytic dialogue! Drooling over the pretty graphics! That was a lot to take in.

Honorable mention to Riven for having twice as many discs and half the content.

Why the hell was this revolutionary? I dunno. Prettiness?

Well, all of you are called upon to think of better examples than I did.

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	janus - February 09, 2006 (03:11 AM) You know, I once thought videogames couldn't get any better than Banjo Kazooie.
	lasthero - February 10, 2006 (06:42 AM) As did I, Janus. As did I.
	bluberry - February 11, 2006 (02:58 PM) I once enjoyed Quake 2 on the N64. I loved how meaty the shotgun blasts and such were, and I still do. I loved how it was better than the PC version, and I still do. I just didn't notice that it's bland and boring and bad and all that jazz.