The intro is a ghastly way to begin a review. I sound like a bored teacher droning on and on in a monotone voice about Darwin to my fourth grade students.
"I'd rather have no real attempt at a story rather than sift through acres of awful, pointless text."
This sentence is terribly awkward.
"The environments outside of the village, where you'll spend most of your time, are somewhat more impressive, but I'd wager that a high-quality N64 title could nearly replicate them."
I simply state this as fact without explaining to the reader *why* this is the case. Also, too many qualifiers.
"...and The Adventures of Darwin certainly isn't without its strengths."
A generic, Gamefaqsish transition.
"Thus, The Adventures of Darwin should probably be played in brief sessions for maximum enjoyment, as the slow tempo may wear thin during marathons."
The low point of the entire review. I probably should have removed this sentence.
I at least maintain a better flow than in previous efforts, and I was able to better disguise the inevitable "graphics" and "music" paragraphs into the text. But the main problem is that the whole thing is just dreadfully, life-suckingly dull. I'm still telling rather than showing.
A step down for me. Disappointing.
(As a side-note, I'm surprised Worthplaying posted this even after I quit.)
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