Forums > Contributor Zone > Review of the Week Jan 25-31: Made with real penguins

It's been a helluva week. I received my second dose of the COVID-19 vaccine at work, and it knocked me on my ass. Predictable, really, since most of my coworkers also fell ill after getting it. The first day was horrendous, but the side effects paled in comparison to what my wife, daughter and in-laws went through a few months ago. On the bright side I've received a couple of days off with pay (and free, too, as they don't count against any of my sick leave or vacation time). I probably would've had this topic hammered out a lot sooner if it hadn't been for those side effects...

Horror movies? Of course!

Color Out of Space (2020) is an adaptation of HP Lovecraft's short story of the same name. No, it isn't technically related to the late '80s Wil Wheaton-starring, Lucio Fulci-produced film The Curse (or the Boris Karloff flick Die, Monster, Die!) aside from sharing source material. Color uses the same premise, where a meteorite lands on a farm and turns everything... You know, I don't know how to put it. It mutates everything? Totally fucks with reality and rewrites physics and... It's just a weird, wonderfully mad film, and much better than The Curse. I'll admit I have a soft spot for the Wheaton/Fulci one, though, mostly because it's so awful and ludicrous that it's actually kinda fun. Connect the dots....

Hereditary (2018) was yet another messed up movie that made me long for a scalding shower. I loved it, really. It's a bit long and slow in some parts, but the payoff was worth it, especially if you know anything about the Ars Goetia and the Key of Solomon. Anyway, the movie revolves around a family whose youngest offspring dies in a gruesome accident, only to apparently haunt their home. I say "apparently" because there's much more at work here than a simple haunting, especially when characters begin digging into their family's history and finding signs of occult rituals...

Finally, The Invisible Man (2020) is a loose adaptation of the novel of the same name. Like Color Out of Space, I don't feel it would be correct to call it a remake of the 1933 adaptation, as that one was more of a horror-comedy blend. Hell, it was one of the movies to kick off the wise-cracking psychopath trope seen in Nightmare on Elm Street, Leprechaun and Child's Play. The 2020 iteration deals with a woman escaping an abusive relationship with an optics scientist/inventor. Eventually, strange phenomena begins to happen around her, and she eventually works out that he's somehow made himself invisible *dramatic music*. I liked this one because it wasn't just a rehash of the 1933 flick, and reimagined the concept with a little more bite. One scene dropped my jaw for a solid minute.

What is this? I've been watching modern horror? What happened to all the '70s-'90s junk I usually put on? Well, I plan to watch Fascination next, so I'll be back on that retro kick in no time.

I've also been playing Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodline, and it really could use a remake. I'm not saying it's bad or anything, but it's definitely dated. Its mechanics are wonky, and it doesn't offer the level of customization that it should. I wanted to play a male Gangrel, but the only character model they had for that one looked like an off-brand Jonathan Davis. No thanks... I restarted since then and went with Brujah instead. I always thought they were cooler than Gangrel anyway...

I've also made one hard decision regarding AlphaMurderthon: I'm not reviewing Pathologic. It seems like a pretty in-depth game, and one that I probably won't be able complete in time. I have decided instead to do either Phantasmagoria or Party Hard.

As for the reviews:

Honestgamer has sold me on Immortals: Fenyx Rising, and also won Review of the Week. I was on the fence with this title before, but I think this review had convinced me to at least wishlist it (if I haven't already). It's a very good review that gives all the details it should while leaving surprises for its readers to discover on their own. This is impressive, because it sounds like the game is pretty sizable, so it's great to read a review of a game like this one that doesn't come across as a wall of text. The best part, though, is your observation near the end, where you point out that the game feels more like an answer to Breath of the Wild rather than a statement in its own right.

EmP's review of Sarrawak is short, but also dishes the proper details without giving too much away. Then again, I'm also assuming there isn't much to discuss about the game, mechanically speaking, so the only options left are to gab too much about the plot and ruin everything or keep this one short and sweet. EmP chose the latter, thankfully.

Overdrive had two reviews this week: a holdover for Megadimension Neptunia VII and a fresh one for Gods Will Fall. The Neptunia review basically outlines how I feel about some JRPGs, where the characters are a bunch of scantily-clad preteens, and the Chris Hanson bit is great. Also, I've been burnt by some generic ones in the past, like White Knight Chronicles. The segments about the combat system read a bit dry at times, but that's RPG combat for you. The best bits of this review discuss the game's comedic elements, which make it sound like one of the better comedy games. I've played my share of them, and they tend to be too loaded with needless pop culture references. What I'm getting from this review is this game is essentially Doom & Destiny meets the PSP PoPoLoCrois game (which is also divided into multiple campaigns), except way better than both.

With Gods Will Fall, the early part of the review started off pretty standard, but picked up greatly when you began discussing this game's RNG problems. It kinda reminds me of Road Not Taken, where the lengths of levels fluctuate. During one run, a dungeon might require you to rescue ten kids, and you end up failing because the stage overwhelms you. When you respawn and begin the dungeon anew, you find it only requires four kids to be saved. Ugh. Anyway, you do a good job of describing this game and talking about the reasons its random number nonsense is a turn-off. I'm glad I didn't accept this assignment, because I can tell I would've hated it.

Mariner opens Gato Roboto with a relatable story for third place. I've played far too many faux-retro platformers with minimalist presentation that feature hazards that appear to be part of the environment. And I, too, died before my brain transitioned into "that's deadly, don't touch it" mode. Although that was a strong hook, your foreshadowing and follow up took the cake here. Yeah, that's a food-based figure of speech, Gary. Deal with it. Anyway, you basically outlined how I more or less feel about "mini-Metroid" games, where the exploration and such are the selling points, and cutting back on them diminishes some of the game's value.

Etherealgamer debuts with Atelier Ryza 2, and also takes second place. The introduction was great, especially the bit about the funnel cake that tied into the conclusion. What follows is a wealth of detail, enough so that a guy who's never played an Atelier game like me knows what to expect from this title. Yeah, I have Atelier Iris and Mana Khemia. I'll get to them at some point... Maybe... Anyway, I don't have much else to add. It's a pretty long review, but certainly not long-winded.

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See you space cowboy

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.

Thanks for the topic, despite what you were going through, and thanks for the comments on my review and also the win. I haven't had one of those in a while. Congrats to all who participated this week!

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto on secret doors to another world2

Congrats to Jason, who does not win enough of these, and to Mariner and Etherealgamer for getting points on the board early. Tough week with a lot of content to get through, so good job getting through it while feeling wonky. At least you're immune to things we've never heard of, now.

For us. For them. For you.

Thanks for the comments. Too bad for me that I didn't get into the top 3, but you'll have that sometimes with the kind of competition we get during some weeks. And there were some really good reviews this week, so I figured it wouldn't be an auto-place sort of week.

I'm not afraid to die because I am invincible
Viva la muerte, that's my goddamn principle