Forums > Contributor Zone > Review of the Week Dec 27 - Jan 3: Son of 2020.

Once again, I have no excuse for this being late. Sure, I can blame the terrific Stories Untold and the decent The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing for chewing up some of my time, but really it just fall down to being late as usual.

Movie ramblings? Yes, I have some:

Deadly Dreams (1988) is a slasher with an actual plot, where a man who witnessed his parents' murders on Christmas Eve is now plagued by dreams and visions of their killer. However, some of these hallucinations seem awfully realistic, and the man wonders if he's going insane or if the man donning a wolf-skin mask is indeed real. While it's a breath of fresh air for this genre, some of its plot points don't quite connect. I'd love to get into the "why" of it, but I won't spoil the movie. Let's just say the big reveal makes the whole ordeal out to be more complicated than it needed to be.

Mandy (2018) stars Nicolas Cage as a man bent on revenge after a hippie cult murders his girlfriend. Some drops of LSD and enough other hard drugs to kill a whale later, he takes out everyone involved in the scheme while hypnotic music blares and Argento-esque color style washes everything. It's a pretty out there, violent movie, and only for those who dig truly batshit filmmaking.

Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) picks up where its predecessor left off, and is not a bad little ghost flick. Lin Shaye's eventual appearance is awesome, as the movie treats her like a special attraction by keeping her off the screen for ages, then giving her a climactic appearance.

The Rift (1990), aka Endless Descent, is your standard cheesy monster movie, where a submarine crew investigates the mysterious disappearance of another sub, only to discover a deep see grotto teeming with mutant seaweed monsters. It's a "bad" flick with shoddy acting and cringy dialogue, but certainly not a dull one.


As for the reviews.

EmP covered Z-Out for Review of the Week, but where the hell is Y-Out ? Wait, no... How did we go from [cross]-Out to Z-Out, and not something like Strike-Out? Stop, that sounds like a baseball game. Ugh, can they not just say X-Out II or call Z-Out something else? Oh, it was? Wargate? Well that's a way better name than frickin' Z-Out! Anyway, your vivid descriptions are what I look for in shmup reviews, and you deliver as expected. Word choice and clever/funny material abounds in this one, especially the bits about soggy kittens and caffeine. Those earned some chuckles.

Mariner talked about Marble It Up! for second place Whatever happened to ball-rolling games? Well, there's one that just called The Ball, but that was more of a Portal clone. Plus, there's the horribly tedious Switchball, but I would be surprised if that wasn't delisted from PSN for being about as entertaining as watching snow melt. This is one of the better reviews I've read for a more technical, "arcade-y' game, as those tend to get pretty dry. This one has a lot of passion behind it, and that places it above a lot of others I've encountered (or even written myself).

Dagoss reviewed Wizardry Empire for third place. You know, I've always been interested in this franchise, but I just haven't gotten into it. Strange, really. You'd think I'd be all over this one. Anyway, there's a wealth of information in this review, and it's interesting to read about the series, especially since I haven't really partaken of it. There are a few rough spots here and there, like unnecessary apostrophes, but the details presented support your opinion, plus serve as a good rundown of the series for the uninitiated (i.e. me).

CptRetroBlue took on The Revenge of Shinobi. I don't have much to add on this review. It's one of your most polished offerings, and its point is well supported by the game's not-so-great play control.

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.

Appreciate the nod -- I really enjoy my impromptu Amiga adventure, even if my hopes for more X-Out were cruelly dashed. Good times had, regardless. Thanks for the kind words.

A friend and I had this running thing for many year where we would meet up once every couple of weeks or so and play bad game tag, where we would essentially force the other to watch bad movies and see who broke first. If you couldn't a film, you lost that round. He beat me with Mandy. I tried watching it several times, but the whole lot of nothing the first half hour or so subjects you to was too much for me. I beat him with Rubber. The film about a mass murdering tyre.

For us. For them. For you.

I liked Mandy, but couldn't stomach Rubber. It felt like it was trying too hard to say, "Hey guys, look how self-aware I am! I am such a self-aware movie and that's cool, right!? Adore me!"

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.

I saw part of Rubber (last 30 minutes, give or take) on some movie channel once while drunk at a friend's house. If I give it credit for anything, it was that I watched that entire approx. 30 minutes just to figure out what the hell was happening. I don't know that I could have watched the whole thing, but that section at least had me intrigued in a "what the hell is this?!?" sort of way.

I'm not afraid to die because I am invincible
Viva la muerte, that's my goddamn principle