Jeff Gerstmann and Alex Navarro are two prevalent editors on GameSpot

Imagine Jeff Gerstmann and Alex Navarro at your local EBGames, GameStop, or Best Buy. Poor adults who have no idea of what to buy for their Christmas-eyed children careen over wired shelves, searching for anything, anything that might appeal to them. They peer at the GTA's, shake their head, go to the budget and used game sections, nod their head, and they do the unthinkable. They reach for Big Rigs. Their eyes glean over Dragonball Sagas. Alex and Jeff watch them let their souls come into contact with the forbidden, the pestilence of all life. They are actually reading the back cover. Alex mutters "Bad monkey, bad monkey,..." in the hopes that his chant will channel enough anti-Big Rig energy into their god-forsaken souls. Jeff is about the feint and writhe on the floor. Do they say something or not?

Oh, the horror.

Has this happened to you? Do I even need to ask?

Step in and the store loses a sale, you might get kicked out if you know who behind the counter finds out, the person might ask to mind your own business, and butting in might be egotistic. Egotistic, I say. Egotsitic. The word slowly burns your mind, preventing you from saying anything.

Don't step in and you will feel useless, you very existence challenged. Your hard-earned knowledge of gaming is now lost to the consumer, those you swore to protect with your controller bashing, your subsequent TV-screen repairs, and your undying sanity.

Oh, the suffering. The suffering.

But I compel you. I urge you. I order you to speak. If actions speak louder than words, then our tolerance, our inaction, becomes our solemn acceptance. Does it not hurt when you see the poor soul go to the counter - the salesman only needs to glance at the box for his eyes to vomit - and the $50 dollars come crashing into his hands with an eye-rolling gesture?

Dare I say it, think of the children. Yes, think of the children, and their brains fried over the throat-stabbing controls, the punch-to-the-stomach gameplay, the grotesque graphics, the blasphemous sounds, and sunshine of childhood innocence fading into darkness.

For shame, for shame.

Don't let "them" do this to us. Find a way to prevent this from happening. If you have not the courage to speak, at least walk toward the buyer and convulse onto the floor. Play sharades. Give them a cookie. Give them $5 if they put it back.

Do it for Jeff. Do it for Alex. Do it for the peace of the universe. Do something before all humanity is lost to the gaming world.

*now convulsing onto floor*

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