Motoroader MC (Turbografx-CD) review "In the tradition of the legendary Super Sprint, each Motoroader race is presented in a single-screen birds' eye view, so that you can see all the racers, all the obstacles, and all the action without any view-changing or mirror-flipping nonsense. There are a few hazards like ice patches or volcanic gorges, but for the most part you'll just hold down the "accelerate" button and speed as quickly as possible through eight laps on each track."

My racing life hung in the balance. A single drop of sweat, precariously perched above my right eyelid, threatened to wash my dreams away. It weebled. Weeble. I hoped — nay, I prayed — that it wouldn't fall any further. It wobbled. Wobble. Damn that drop! With both hands gripped tightly on the wheel, I couldn't afford even a single moment of hesitation.

Save the drama for yo' mama! In Motoroader MC, you'll crash a thousand times and keep on going, because you're invincible. MC aims to emulate the fun of a bumper cars extravaganza, but takes advantage of its virtual format to provide every racer with infinite bombs and infinite rockets, all without any of the murder charges or parental scorn you'd face if you started exploding carnival cars in real life. MC's a fun, silly romp across 25 different tracks loaded with voluptuous women, conveyor belts, "zip" arrows, and monkeys.

...monkeys? Monkeys!

In the tradition of the legendary Super Sprint, each Motoroader race is presented in a single-screen birds' eye view, so that you can see all the racers, all the obstacles, and all the action without any view-changing or mirror-flipping nonsense. There are a few hazards like ice patches or volcanic gorges, but for the most part you'll just hold down the "accelerate" button and speed as quickly as possible through eight laps on each track.

Each five-track course has its own featured theme (city, nature, etc). For added fun, you can enter "edit" mode which lets you create custom courses from a set of 25 pre-made tracks, which really isn't as many as it sounds like. Sadly, there's no bitchin' track editor like you'd find in Excitebike.

The game tries to compensate for its lack of length with personality. For example, when you get to The Dungeon, you'll experience the strangest (if not the best) that Motoroader's MC Escher track design has to offer. Each "room" in the dungeon contains an exit that teleports you to another room's entrance, so cars keep vanishing and re-appearing all over the map! It's pretty difficult, especially when you're zooming along at over 200 miles per hour. (I pulled that number out of my butt.)

HOWEVER, Motoroader MC's execution just doesn't live up to the "crazy fun" concept. The game expects you to accelerate, brake, launch rockets, and drop bombs using only two buttons! If you're out to brawl, get ready for some silly turbo switch-flipping chicanery... and don't expect to place higher than 4th on any given track. If you just focus on racing, the computer-controlled opponents won't hesitate to abuse their unfair advantage. They'll bop you on the narrow straightaways, powerslide past you on the curves, and launch FUSION-POWERED ROCKETS every time you get ahead. That's quite the pisser.

Counter to typical "racing game" style, the game won't end no matter how many times you finish last. Basically, you can wipe out on every race and still advance to one of Motoroader MC's Legendarily Awful Endings. Check it out — this ending just shows a big pixellated monkey that scales for no reason, kind of like those dumb planets from Space Megaforce. RAWK!

So, to sum things up, I'd have to say that the venerable Super Sprint still reigns supreme. Sure, Motoroader MC provides some cheap thrills set to spiffy visuals and kicky fast CD metal-lite music, but it doesn't have enough tracks, and the flawed "weapons" system brings the entire experience down. Furthermore, since you can't lose, there's not much incentive to try and improve. On the other hand, if you've got four friends and a Turbo Tap, the five-player mode and special bonus multi-player games KICK ASS.

Note: You can turn weapons off in the option menu.

Note: Super Sprint is still better.

Plop!

//Zig

Staff review by Zigfried (June 13, 2006) Zigfried likes writing about whales and angry seamen, and often does so at the local pub.