DARK (Xbox 360) review
"I didn't buy DARK for its award-winning narrative, thankfully, but because it's a stealth title. Well, that, and I was curious due to the hate the game was receiving."
Guess it's just a habit carried over from my childhood, but even in this day and age, whenever I purchase a new title, there's still a need to take a brief look in the manual before starting up the game. And since they just don't make booklets like they used to, I'm always disappointed seeing a manual that's only two or three pages filled with seizure warnings and copyrights, with some telling me to go on the Internet for instructions! So when I flipped open DARK's pamphlet, I was both surprised and uncomfortable when the introductory page started talking about Twilight. Yes, that Twilight. It didn't say it by name, but "sparkling, metrosexual vampires", "movies", and "male underwear models" pretty much gave it away. However, the pain subsided when the introduction wasn't in favor of said fad, and went on to say that DARK is an attempt to harken back to the oldschool ways of the vampire. Five pages later, I was also given a list of ingredients for an alcoholic beverage. What. While it didn't give me the same excitable, mushy feeling of yesteryear's manuals, it's been quite some time that a modern one made me eager to dive into a game due to such unorthodox printings!
Not even a couple minutes in, I found myself in a nightclub with some awful trance music and people with tacky clothing. Apparently, the developers' idea of "oldschool" is vampires running a business in a late 90s/early 00s setting. Then there's the plot: you just became a half-vampire, have amnesia, and with the help of an unintentionally cross-eyed nightclub owner, a man that talks in "dude speak", and twin sisters (all vampires), you begin your quest to transform into a full vampire in order to prevent the dreadful alternative. If the story sounds like it'll be a bore, you're right, and it doesn't help that you won't care for any of the characters, which is a setback for the plot when serious things happen to them later on. The protagonist is the guiltiest of all, sadly, since this man has zero personality, talks in a brooding, monotone manner, and thanks to the amnesia angle, you're literally playing with an empty shell. I guess the one upside is that I don't hate any of these characters, which could have made for a dreadful experience.
Featured community review by pickhut (August 03, 2013)
These Dragon taglines are too easy.
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