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Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews

The Guardian Legend (NES)

The Guardian Legend review (NES)

Reviewed on August 02, 2007

Optomon doesn’t initially seem so imposing. This circular, one-eyed mass of vegetation does little but float from one side of the screen to the other while emitting bullets and unpredictable, but slow-moving, lasers. But, while pummeling the monster with everything she has, the Guardian brushes one of those lasers and watches her life bar get decimated. Suddenly, this fight has become a lot more tense as she realizes even the smallest mistake could be her last. And take my word on it — it’s easy to get so focused on dodging lasers that this critter’s weak bullets are what deals the killing blow....
overdrive's avatar
Dungeon Maker: Hunting Ground (PSP)

Dungeon Maker: Hunting Ground review (PSP)

Reviewed on August 01, 2007

I was given free reign to make my dungeon look any way I wanted. Even when I had to put the game down, I was planning my next floor. “Do I want long corridors towards several rooms," I would find myself asking with every floor "or do I want curved, turning hallways to spiral out from the starting point?”
True's avatar
Final Fantasy Legend (Game Boy)

Final Fantasy Legend review (GB)

Reviewed on August 01, 2007

I’ll give it credit for one thing: this game’s release was a radical departure from all the other RPGs of its day. Mixing the standard swords and sorcery with machine guns and nuclear missiles, you’ll even explore the post-apocalyptic ruins of a modern city in a universe where humans, mutants, and several varieties of monsters apparently live in harmony without trying to eat each other. Four distinct worlds are connected via a seemingly endless tower that’s said to ultimately lead to paradise, inspiring your party of four to risk its dizzying heights. Unfortunately for them, Final Fantasy Legend is no paradise by any stretch of the imagination; it’s actually a one-way ticket straight to the bowels of hell.
sho's avatar
Clock Tower (SNES)

Clock Tower review (SNES)

Reviewed on July 31, 2007

Considerably more obscure than its PlayStation sequel, the original Clock Tower nevertheless enjoys a cult following today thanks to an unofficial English translation. And why shouldn’t it? You’ll explore a roomy old house, engage in a healthy bit of kleptomania, and struggle to escape the blades of a misshapen serial killer.
sho's avatar
Brave Story: New Traveler (PSP)

Brave Story: New Traveler review (PSP)

Reviewed on July 30, 2007

Brave Story is the type of game that takes the core things that make up its genre, and then does them very well without adding a lot of fluff. It has no qualms about telling you bluntly that it is a symbolic plunge into your own imagination.
dragoon_of_infinity's avatar
Voyage: Inspired by Jules Verne (PC)

Voyage: Inspired by Jules Verne review (PC)

Reviewed on July 30, 2007

The game adaptation draws inspiration from the book, but, ultimately, gives you the adventure that Verne's three explorers could only dream about as their shell floated past their target.
EmP's avatar
Tombs & Treasure (NES)

Tombs & Treasure review (NES)

Reviewed on July 29, 2007

At first glance Tombs & Treasure might resemble a 1st person dungeon crawl, but it actually plays more like a dumbed-down Shadowgate with a helping of faux-RPG elements tossed in for good measure.
sho's avatar
Maniac Mansion (Famicom) (NES)

Maniac Mansion (Famicom) review (NES)

Reviewed on July 28, 2007

Every fan of awesome graphic adventures knows that Maniac Mansion is one of the all-time classics of the genre and that it can’t possibly get any weirder than it already is. However only one of these statements is actually true! While 1990 saw an excellent NES conversion that was developed in-house by LucasArts themselves, publisher Jaleco had actually created their own Japanese-only version two years before. And as we all know, whenever you get Japanese programmers and tentacles together, mayhem is sure to ensue.
sho's avatar
The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (Wii)

The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess review (WII)

Reviewed on July 27, 2007

I liked the game, darn it! It is majestic, captivating, engrossing, and above all, fun. So what's my problem?!
draqq_zyxx's avatar
Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones (PlayStation 2)

Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones review (PS2)

Reviewed on July 26, 2007

Getting close to an unsuspecting enemy will cause things to slow down and go blurry, allowing the prince to initiate a very fast, and very stylish kill. His dagger will flash blue when the time is right to hit the attack button. If your timing is off, you'll bollocks up the sequence, and have to fight the enemy the old fashioned way, or else use a Sand Tank to rewind time and try it again.
Masters's avatar
Seirei Senshi Spriggan (Turbografx-CD)

Seirei Senshi Spriggan review (TGCD)

Reviewed on July 26, 2007

To truly succeed, to inspire awe and admiration, a shooter needs more than lots of things to shoot at. It needs depth, and it needs heart — fortunately, Spriggan delivers both.
zigfried's avatar
Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee (PlayStation)

Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee review (PSX)

Reviewed on July 25, 2007

With a forebodingly somber score and intricately detailed, pre-rendered backgrounds, Abe’s Oddysee is a sensual luxury, but the gameplay is straight from Out of This World, and just as hard.
pup's avatar
Dragon View (SNES)

Dragon View review (SNES)

Reviewed on July 25, 2007

Part of the reason I found so many of the monsters to be easy to kill was because I'd wind up blundering through so many one-way doors and had to fight the same groups of enemies repeatedly that, for a good portion of the game, Alex was over-leveled for just about everything he faced.
overdrive's avatar
Transformers: The Game (Xbox 360)

Transformers: The Game review (X360)

Reviewed on July 24, 2007

Rearranged and mutated, much of the epic feel of the film has thus been lost in translation and Transformers is left to stand solely on its playability and graphical achievement.
carcinogen_crush's avatar
Beat 'Em & Eat 'Em (Atari 2600)

Beat 'Em & Eat 'Em review (A2600)

Reviewed on July 24, 2007

Taking control of two blocky blondes in the nude, you’re supposed to gulp down falling drops of semen being spurted from the freakishly endowed man lurking in the rooftops. Of course this is on the 2600, so his mammoth member actually looks more like a giant nose complete with itty bitty eyes; but while the graphics might have been good for their day, you’re not going to find them the least bit arousing unless you’re an utter twat.
sho's avatar
Sword of the New World: Granado Espada (PC)

Sword of the New World: Granado Espada review (PC)

Reviewed on July 23, 2007

Time to phone your friends and family one last time and wave goodbye to your social life for a good long while: there's a new MMORPG in the shops, and it's a biggie.
lisanne's avatar
Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3 (PlayStation 2)

Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3 review (PS2)

Reviewed on July 23, 2007

The effort you must apply toward the protagonist’s social progression is one of the most interesting things about Persona 3. If he doesn’t seize every opportunity for a conversation with one of his peers at the local high school (or in the community that lies outside its halls), he’ll be significantly outclassed by his enemies when battles occur.
honestgamer's avatar
Brooktown High: Senior Year (PSP)

Brooktown High: Senior Year review (PSP)

Reviewed on July 23, 2007

The one thing that The Sims sold was complexity; the thing that Brooktown sells is fun. From the very beginning, you realize it doesn’t take itself too seriously. The game starts out with huge-headed, tiny-bodied characters playing volleyball, jumping freeways on skateboards and racing to class, while “Out Here All Night”, an upbeat and edgy tune blares in the background.
True's avatar
Disney/Pixar Ratatouille (Game Boy Advance)

Disney/Pixar Ratatouille review (GBA)

Reviewed on July 23, 2007

There are license-based adventures on the Game Boy Advance that provide a fantastic experience. Ratatouille isn’t one of them. It doesn’t even come close. Without ever truly failing on a technical level, the game sucks all of the fun out of its license. The resulting product isn’t entertaining in the slightest.
honestgamer's avatar
Transformers: Decepticons (DS)

Transformers: Decepticons review (DS)

Reviewed on July 22, 2007

Whether you choose to follow the game’s story, which is told through a series of missions, or elect to simply spend the afternoon driving the police nuts by raising and lowering your “wanted” level (a gauge measuring how vigorously the authorities pursue you; smash stuff to raise the level, behave and the cops will leave you alone), there is a lot of sadistic fun to be had with the game. Being that you’re playing as a bad guy, you’ll probably want to break as much stuff as possible, if only just to live up to your name.
nimerjm37's avatar

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