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Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Doom 3 (Xbox)

Doom 3 review (XBX)

Reviewed on April 21, 2005

It's an edge of your seat roller coaster ride fired through a minimalist world of spine chilling terror. Intelligent plot twists and character development? Whatever. Such things cloud the atmosphere and instead we're given heart. Bloody and raw gouged freshly from a chest, its still beating will to live enough to drive players through gore both thick and thin.
midwinter's avatar
Shinobi (PlayStation 2)

Shinobi review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 19, 2005

What of the game design we thrilled to in Shinobi III, the game most widely considered to epitomize Shinobi? What of double jumps and rainbow shuriken showers? Oh, they're still here. They just don't matter.
Masters's avatar
Kirby: Canvas Curse (DS)

Kirby: Canvas Curse review (DS)

Reviewed on April 19, 2005

If you had asked me 12 months ago what I thought of Nintendo's Kirby, chances are I would have compared the little guy to an ill-formed testicle before slapping you across the back of the head. Ask me again today however and I'll happily explain how his touch screen debut is one of the most inventive, 2D action games around.
midwinter's avatar
Joe & Mac (SNES)

Joe & Mac review (SNES)

Reviewed on April 18, 2005

Besides the fact that Joe and Mac toss weapons as if their arms are made of string cheese, there’s the matter of narrow platforms. Most of these are saved for the end of the game, in the last level or two. It’s easy to spend a few lives just trying to make it across a chasm, thanks to the tendency your chosen caveman has to pass through ledges because of faulty hit detection. Even when you don’t have to worry about instant death from such matters, you have to remember that you move slowly and compensate for it.
honestgamer's avatar
El Viento (Genesis)

El Viento review (GEN)

Reviewed on April 17, 2005

When Annet leaps into the air to avoid gangsters' bullets, she lets her bare arms fly loose, ribbons from her hair and waist flowing with the wind as her skirt lifts ever so slightly in the breeze. After falling back down, Annet's slender legs buckle to absorb the impact. That microscopic attention to detail is part of Wolf Team's genius, and Annet's been giving lovesick gamers a cruel jones for close to 15 years now.
zigfried's avatar
Elemental Master (Genesis)

Elemental Master review (GEN)

Reviewed on April 16, 2005

While running between cliff walls, you have to watch out for the punks on either side that are trying to roll boulders on your head. But then a gust picks up, creating a wind tunnel within the canyon — so now you've got to fight not only the boulder-bums and spitting plants, but you've got to fight the wind at your back as well!
zigfried's avatar
Strip Fighter II (TurboGrafx-16)

Strip Fighter II review (TG16)

Reviewed on April 13, 2005

You won’t even want to beat it.
sho's avatar
Bleach: Heat the Soul (PSP)

Bleach: Heat the Soul review (PSP)

Reviewed on April 12, 2005

Still oddly enough, Bleach: Heat the Soul manages to entertain. The action while hardly technical is enjoyable for what it is, proving that style over substance can, from time to time, be quite rewarding. You won't find the depth of gameplay that other 3D fighters are so proud of, nor will you want to indulge in its limited delights for an extended period of time. What you will do however is have a short term blast with a genre that's yet to receive a true, PSP makeover.
midwinter's avatar
The Thing (Xbox)

The Thing review (XBX)

Reviewed on April 10, 2005

Throughout the game, Blake will recruit, lose, and reacquire soldiers of the three differing flavours that all need to be managed. And manage them you must; in an obviously hostile environment, newly discovered troops will not always happily trust you right off the bat.
EmP's avatar
Ring of Red (PlayStation 2)

Ring of Red review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 07, 2005

With metallic clanking accompanying your units movements, you'll soon discover that you control your troops much like you would play a game of chess. This gives you a free hand to traverse around the topographic mapscape, which is littered with allies, enemies and various helpful landmarks.
EmP's avatar
Asuka 120% Special Burning Fest (PlayStation)

Asuka 120% Special Burning Fest review (PSX)

Reviewed on April 06, 2005

Pummel your opponent for a few seconds and build your Super Meter up to 100 percent, unlocking the ominously-named Kero Kero Anger or ferocious twirling pom-pom attacks! The Super Meter isn't a new invention, but Asuka takes it to the ludicrous extreme... because it doesn't stop at 100 percent! The meter keeps filling all the way up to 120% Burning.
zigfried's avatar
Shin Megami Tensei: Digital Devil Saga (PlayStation 2)

Shin Megami Tensei: Digital Devil Saga review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 05, 2005

If you make a stupid blunder, the enemy will take advantage of it. Similarly, if you happen to manage something clever or you’ve learned the right spells, you can trick the enemy into wasting its turns with ineffectual magic. The robust combat system allows you to give up half a turn if you don’t want a particular character to attack, so finding yourself in battle with one of your three heroes ill-equipped isn’t the end of the world.
honestgamer's avatar
Pick Me, Honey! (PC)

Pick Me, Honey! review (PC)

Reviewed on April 03, 2005

How seriously can you take a game when the most colorful cast member is the protagonist’s testicles? Reiji’s unit displays more emotion than any of the female diversions. It grows angry and rigid, explores moments of honesty, twitches, pulsates and even finds itself surprised by certain circumstances. In contrast, the girls are as one-dimensional as you may imagine.
honestgamer's avatar
Perfect Dark (Nintendo 64)

Perfect Dark review (N64)

Reviewed on April 03, 2005

I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Perfect Dark's wicked multiplayer mode, one packed with enough depth and nuance to make bland crapfests like Timesplitters 2's (admit it, you only liked playing as the monkey) squirm. The design is rad; levels such as the glass-intensive Grid, which features two large rooms connected by an elevator and some tight corridors, never fail to amuse, and the weapons fit just as neatly into this as they do the solo campaign.
bluberry's avatar
LMA Manager 2004 (PlayStation 2)

LMA Manager 2004 review (PS2)

Reviewed on March 31, 2005

For the rest of you, LMA 2004 can be easily summed up: It's LMA 2003 with cosmetic changes to the gameplay and an updated roster. Just like any annually-released sports game, if you've played one version, you've played them all.
EmP's avatar
Meteos (DS)

Meteos review (DS)

Reviewed on March 28, 2005

Though the whys and wherefores behind such an oversight may be obvious, it should be noted that in pandering to the portable 5 minute ethos, Meteos' heady mix of brain twisting action has sadly been rendered stilted and neut. It's action best suited to the time between bus stops, anything more and you're schmit out of luck.
midwinter's avatar
God of War (PlayStation 2)

God of War review (PS2)

Reviewed on March 27, 2005

When you first meet Ares early in the game, it's pretty daunting. Hundreds of flaming arrows pierce Athen's midnight sky on their hopeless flight to the god's impenetrable skin. Ares' hand-hurled fireballs blast the city walls to bits, sending rubble tumbling recklessly down the Temple's steps. Frightened villagers scurry about in a panic . . . villagers that you can murder.
zigfried's avatar
Gekibo: Gekisha Boy (TurboGrafx-16)

Gekibo: Gekisha Boy review (TG16)

Reviewed on March 27, 2005

Pernicious pictorials to publicize perverted persons, prose pending.
sho's avatar
Casual Romance Club (PC)

Casual Romance Club review (PC)

Reviewed on March 26, 2005

Suddenly, it’s not so awesome that you’re given so much freedom, because the way the game is set up makes taking advantage of your options unpractical. More than in any other hentai game I’ve played, earning the nudity becomes a tedious chore. Even worse, you don’t get to see everything. There are mosaic blurs over anything below the waist.
honestgamer's avatar
Cobra Mission (PC)

Cobra Mission review (PC)

Reviewed on March 26, 2005

The best part is the combat itself. Instead of merely selecting "Attack", guide the mouse to a certain location on the opponent and ferociously CLICK. Armored guards are vulnerable at the unprotected neck — well-endowed female bodybuilders are resistant to attack at their iron breasts.
zigfried's avatar

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