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Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Rampage (Arcade)

Rampage review (ARC)

Reviewed on October 20, 2005

Rampage’s attempts at proper villainy ultimately fall flatter than an animated coyote (apetitius giganticus) who finds himself momentarily hovering with the clouds high above a desert ravine.
sho's avatar
Sengoku Cannon: Sengoku Ace Episode III (PSP)

Sengoku Cannon: Sengoku Ace Episode III review (PSP)

Reviewed on October 19, 2005

With Sengoku Cannon: Sengoku Ace Episode III, the question isn't so much what went wrong as it is, what on earth were Psikyo thinking?! Taking a popular franchise and releasing a quick-to-market sequel is nothing new. Flushing away years worth of hard work and a solid reputation however, is something else entirely.
midwinter's avatar
Killer 7 (PlayStation 2)

Killer 7 review (PS2)

Reviewed on October 18, 2005

Killer 7 is like coming across a one-legged dog at a circus freak show.
pup's avatar
X-Men Legends II: Rise of Apocalypse (GameCube)

X-Men Legends II: Rise of Apocalypse review (GCN)

Reviewed on October 17, 2005

It’s a good thing that Apocalypse is a far cry from the current crop of villains, because if he wasn’t, X-Men Legends II would be all the more disappointing. Not bad, mind you…just disappointing.
lasthero's avatar
Micro Machines (Xbox)

Micro Machines review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 16, 2005

All in all, if this latest version of Micro Machines proves anything, it is that games cannot live on nostalgia alone. Perhaps some excuse can be found in the fact that it was Infograme's first shot at the series that CodeMasters did so well for so many years, or perhaps it is just another case of a series finally running out of steam. Either way, sadly, Micro Machines is to bare thread for fans of the earlier games, and suffers from too many flaws to draw people new in.
EmP's avatar
Fifa Soccer 06 (Xbox)

Fifa Soccer 06 review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

Frankie doesn't do this. Instead he gift-wraps the ball and gives it to Roy Keane. Football fans: think on this a little. Frank Lampard -- Frank bloody Lampard -- making an error so basic that I'd blush about doing it for my local Sunday league team. Despite hefty price tags and huge collection of stats, Fifa lets the best players in the world sometimes play like pre-schoolers.
EmP's avatar
Breakdown (Xbox)

Breakdown review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

I love Guilty Gear as much as the next guy, but there's just something more viscerally thrilling about actually flying across the room and knocking some poor sap in the gut rather than just watching your fighter of choice do it from the side.
bluberry's avatar
Tecmo Classic Arcade (Xbox)

Tecmo Classic Arcade review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

Tecmo Cup tries to make soccer exciting, but it plays like a crippled Blade of Steel (NES) or NHL Hockey (Genesis), although I have to admit I was pretty excited when my very first kick scored a goal against the opposing team. Senjyo is an exercise in 3D innovation that doesn't really work, and Pinball Action is so boring that Tecmo had to put the word "Action" at the end to try to trick you into thinking it's exciting.
zigfried's avatar
Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening (PlayStation 2)

Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening review (PS2)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

The rest of it rules, save possibly the atrocious vocals in the background music (TO TAKE ME DOWN YOU MUST FIGHT LIKE A MAN!), but the lacking opposition is a flaw that can't possibly be understated. Most every battle in the original was refreshing thanks to the constantly-changing yet consistently-excellent lineup of monsters; in stark contrast, I was almost bored with many of this one's fights by the time I'd worked my way through a few hours of "guy with scythe".
bluberry's avatar
Ys: The Ark of Napishtim (PlayStation 2)

Ys: The Ark of Napishtim review (PS2)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

Although the character models have changed, the music and locales are as gorgeous as before. Every room in the Temple of Memory is infested with skittering insects that drop from the ceilings, sometimes on Adol's head! With angler-like antennae lighting their way in the dark, these bugs crawl along the floors and ceiling as water flows down the walls into shallow ruts around each chamber's periphery.
zigfried's avatar
Katamari Damacy (PlayStation 2)

Katamari Damacy review (PS2)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

Fortunately, the gameplay takes itself about as seriously, featuring diverse wackiness ranging from haddocks that flop about inside of your doom sphere to innocent bystanders that run away screaming as if they'd just seen Godzilla. Who knows, maybe they did... you just never know what's inside your katamari!
bluberry's avatar
Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball (Xbox)

Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 15, 2005

The volleyball action itself can be pretty intense. Your opponents behave differently depending on their confidence level — "unwilling" foes are like those girls in Phys Ed class who always let the volleyball fall at their feet because they think hitting it might fracture their forearm. "Confident" opponents are like the Volleyball team captains — hyperkinetic, long-legged beauties who block even the jocks' spikes with ease. The nice bit is, you can actually predict the oppositions' attitude before a match based on their character portraits!
zigfried's avatar
Body Harvest (Nintendo 64)

Body Harvest review (N64)

Reviewed on October 14, 2005

You’re just one man, so you’re outnumbered. You’ve just got one gun, so you’re outmatched. You’re Marty McFly with a laser pistol, and you’ve got to do what all the armies of all the nations on the entire planet couldn’t do in a hundred years’ time: Stop the aliens.
lasthero's avatar
Guilty Gear XX #Reload (PSP)

Guilty Gear XX #Reload review (PSP)

Reviewed on October 12, 2005

Borrowing the best elements from many of its contemporaries, #Reload's own brand of one-on-one violence feels every bit as familiar as its port status may suggest. From the now standard projectile attacks to a dozen, quick-off-the-wrist dragon punches, the game presents itself as a beautiful, amalgamation of the genre's best. Even the high flying combo strikes of Marvel vs Capcom get a look in, asking players to juggle their opponents way up the screen as the various, cartoon-esque backdrops erupt into flames.
midwinter's avatar
Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow (DS)

Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow review (DS)

Reviewed on October 11, 2005

Amoebic sludge balls, armor shelled warriors with axes, shape shifting walls, and lightning powered phoenixes -- these are the things a Castlevania game is made of.
destinati0n's avatar
Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow (DS)

Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow review (DS)

Reviewed on October 11, 2005

A wooden puppet master whose chamber is lined with several iron maidens for you to be trapped in and a clawed wall-hopper eerily reminiscent of Street Fighter 2's Vega are two of the many highlights within Dawn's impressive bestiary.
bluberry's avatar
Indigo Prophecy (Xbox)

Indigo Prophecy review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 09, 2005

And then it's over; the mental images cease. A revolted Kane looks down at the corpse he's still kneeling over and at the bloody knife still clasped in his soiled hands. What just took place defies explanation, but the more pressing fact is that corpse laying on the bathroom floor. A corpse that's not getting any less dead. What do you do? This isn't for Lucas to decided; this choice is entirely yours.
EmP's avatar
Ninja Gaiden Black (Xbox)

Ninja Gaiden Black review (XBX)

Reviewed on October 09, 2005

If Ninja Gaiden is the story of the World's Greatest Super Ninja, then Ninja Gaiden Black is the epic tale of how a lowly dog becomes a Master Ninja. With each successive play, Black adds enemies and obstacles that not only make the game harder, but keep it fresh — including a new whip-swinging Greater Fiend. To even survive the tougher modes, I had to sharpen my reflexes, train my memory, and master the game's many secrets. In short, I had to follow the Path of the Ninja.
zigfried's avatar
Robo Aleste (Sega CD)

Robo Aleste review (SCD)

Reviewed on October 08, 2005

With the line sharply drawn between Motonari's alliance of evil and Nobunaga's force of... good?... Compile has infused a driving theme into their 12-stage epic. Each episode, whether it's a rain-streaked flight above placid farmland or a harrowing weave through rocky canyons (as warships take aim from the river below), feels like it's important because each boss has his own unique face and historical personality.
zigfried's avatar
Advance Wars: Dual Strike (DS)

Advance Wars: Dual Strike review (DS)

Reviewed on October 07, 2005

We definitely do not get enough thought provoking situations throughout the average day. Whether it be sitting in college mindlessly daydreaming on how you can ignore the next upcoming class or watching that same anime rerun you have seen thousands of times, there just has to be something that can be both interesting and difficult. It wasn't soon after I asked myself this question that I came upon Advance Wars: Dual Strike.
destinati0n's avatar

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