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Review Archives (Staff Reviews)

You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews

Fight Night Round 3 (PlayStation 2)

Fight Night Round 3 review (PS2)

Reviewed on June 05, 2006

Fighting without the energy bar, with no concrete way to gauge my opponents health and stamina, has made this game one of the most intense experiences I’ve ever had on any console; it’s amazing on multiple levels. The opponent’s body becomes your gauge; you’re targeting him, picking out spots, centering, focusing your attacks, faking him, looking to make sure he hurts in one spot more than the others. You land a solid blow and it hits with all the subtlety of roaring thunder; the controller shakes, the screen shakes, blood spurts from his mouth, you can feel the ribs give way as your fist connects.
lasthero's avatar
Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow (PlayStation 2)

Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow review (PS2)

Reviewed on June 02, 2006

Your parents were wrong. What you can’t see, certainly can hurt you.
pup's avatar
Mike Tyson's Punch-Out! (NES)

Mike Tyson's Punch-Out! review (NES)

Reviewed on June 01, 2006

France’s most stalwart athlete, Glass Joe, quickly finds out his career is heading for a humiliating end, as his punches are easily dodged by Mac, who then responds by sending jab after jab into Joe’s face. The fight is short and brutal — with Glass Joe spending more time face down than the average hentai game chick.
overdrive's avatar
Steambot Chronicles (PlayStation 2)

Steambot Chronicles review (PS2)

Reviewed on May 29, 2006

Steambot Chronicles is cool like that; there’s an overlying story, sure, but progressing it rarely requires you to do anything hard. Hell, it rarely requires you to do much at all.
lasthero's avatar
RapeLay (PC)

RapeLay review (PC)

Reviewed on May 27, 2006

To some extent, RapeLay represents a substantial evolution in hentai gaming: diverse, real-time, interactive sexual intercourse. But let's be honest. In RapeLay, you rape women in the most abusive manner possible and the women learn to like it. Well-programmed or not, I can't get behind that.
zigfried's avatar
Faxanadu (NES)

Faxanadu review (NES)

Reviewed on May 21, 2006

However, one cannot simply loiter near town enriching themselves through the lucrative practice of repeated suicide. The regions of Faxanadu are loaded with dungeons, as well as hostile, mutated dwarves that mean business! Considering the limitations of the NES, many of this game's assortment of baddies are simply incredible. Just look at the boss shaped like a monstrous torso as it bounces towards the hero, teeth gnashing in anticipation of their inevitable plunge through his armor into soft flesh.
overdrive's avatar
New Super Mario Bros. (DS)

New Super Mario Bros. review (DS)

Reviewed on May 20, 2006

I knew better than to hope for a DS game that could capture all of that for me again. Nostalgia sets unrealistic expectations. No, I’m not bitter because things weren’t exactly as I wished for them to be. In many ways, they came much closer than I ever expected. Instead, I’m upset because New Super Mario Bros. has too many issues that get in the way of a consistently good time.
honestgamer's avatar
Yu-Gi-Oh! Ultimate Masters: World Championship Tournament 2006 (Game Boy Advance)

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ultimate Masters: World Championship Tournament 2006 review (GBA)

Reviewed on May 19, 2006

World Championship 2006 is a great game that hints at a potentially excellent future. Unlike its drooling idiot siblings on the half-powered Yu-Gi-Oh! Double Pack, this final GBA edition combines all the card game's actual rules (including Fusion Monsters) with the thrill of purchasing and ripping open hundreds of virtual booster packs. The only things holding this particular Pak back are some audiovisual inadequacies and the sore lack of online play.
zigfried's avatar
Tomb Raider: Legend (PlayStation 2)

Tomb Raider: Legend review (PS2)

Reviewed on May 19, 2006

Fortunately, the boring fights only make up a small part of the game. You've got exploration. You've got puzzle solving. 1/3 suck, 2/3 good.
lasthero's avatar
Dreamfall: The Longest Journey (Xbox)

Dreamfall: The Longest Journey review (XBX)

Reviewed on May 18, 2006

As a result, there are plenty of times where you’ll be working through an area and the adventure is cut short because someone was alerted to your presence. The circumstances aren’t always the same—sometimes you’re ducking around robots and shards of glass, while others you might be trying to let the sound of a train mask your movements from a watchdog—but the frustration remains in tact.
honestgamer's avatar
Generation of Chaos (PSP)

Generation of Chaos review (PSP)

Reviewed on May 12, 2006

Every unit you command is controlled through this set-up. Each time you want to recruit someone to your cause, or give a gift to an especially useful warrior, or develop the land around a stronghold or whatever, you have to wade through menus. Those commands you might wish to use most frequently are generally two or three levels down, to boot.
honestgamer's avatar
Justice League Task Force (Genesis)

Justice League Task Force review (GEN)

Reviewed on May 12, 2006

The problem here is that, even though Task Force does some things right, it nullifies the good points by being flat-out boring.
lasthero's avatar
LEGO Star Wars: The Video Game (PlayStation 2)

LEGO Star Wars: The Video Game review (PS2)

Reviewed on May 09, 2006

Most zones require rapid character swapping if you want to discover everything. For example, you might see a ledge you can’t reach. Your Jedi only has a limited jump, but perhaps you have Padme along. She can use her grappling hook to reach higher areas, then trip some switches so that her friends can follow. Or maybe there’s a hidden item. You can see it, but you can’t reach it.
honestgamer's avatar
Sweet Paradise (PSP)

Sweet Paradise review (PSP)

Reviewed on May 07, 2006

Quick show of hands, who here wants to date a pre-teen Japanese girl? Better yet, what if you could take this lovely young lady on a private holiday, just the two of you exploring the sandy tropical beaches of Bali... would you like that?
midwinter's avatar
X-Multiply (Arcade)

X-Multiply review (ARC)

Reviewed on May 04, 2006

One memorable section sends the player down a long corridor to a vast chamber while dodging deadly drops of fluid dripping from the ceiling, leading me to believe my travels had taken me into the depths of the digestive system, where mammoth drops of stomach acid posed a very real threat. Then again, that level’s boss was a snake-like creature that fired bullets suspiciously shaped like sperm, so I may not actually have been in the belly of the beast....
overdrive's avatar
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion (PC)

The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion review (PC)

Reviewed on May 02, 2006

Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion truly is one of those titles that only appear once in a blue moon; in a time where dry points are strewn about the gaming scene.
destinati0n's avatar
Beatmania (PlayStation 2)

Beatmania review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 29, 2006

To really enjoy the experience, you better have some serious dexterity, hardcore beat-matching skills, perseverance, and a love for every little sub-genre of electronic music out there.
pup's avatar
Spider-Man & Venom: Separation Anxiety (Genesis)

Spider-Man & Venom: Separation Anxiety review (GEN)

Reviewed on April 28, 2006

Separation Anxiety, however, does not have that style. Not a bit of it. It doesn’t progress the story with comic panels; it gives you a wall of text before each mission and lets you go. The storyline it came from was weak in the first place, and there’s no attempt to hide that here; most of your time is going to be spent fighting color-swapped versions of the same enemy in exotic locales like the mall and the sewer for poorly explained reasons.
lasthero's avatar
Medal of Honor (PlayStation)

Medal of Honor review (PSX)

Reviewed on April 27, 2006

In his briefing, Jimmy is given authorization papers to show guards. He’s told to AVOID combat, sneak around, do what he has to do and get out as quickly as possible. And when he does that, the one-star (maybe two) rating he’ll get upon achieving this hollow success will weigh upon his heart like a scarlet letter of shame.
overdrive's avatar
Shadow of the Colossus (PlayStation 2)

Shadow of the Colossus review (PS2)

Reviewed on April 25, 2006

In the end, the hardest thing to deal with is in knowing that the game will eventually come to an end. Shadow’s brilliance lies in its desire to be different from any other role-playing title out there.
destinati0n's avatar

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