Review Archives (Reader Reviews)

You are currently looking through reader reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

	No More Heroes review (WII) Reviewed by jiggs on February 01, 2010 - # I've rarely played a game that prides itself on being "punk". Grasshopper Manufacture even revamped their logo with the motto "Punk's Not Dead" to reflect this brand new attitude. Yet it's not like Suda 51 changed styles. In essence, the demented game designer has been making punk games all along with his unconventional fusion of abstract pop art and minimalist game design. The only problem was he never had an image to fit his style...
	Sonic Unleashed review (X360) Reviewed by Fedule on January 31, 2010 - # At first, I couldn't figure this game out. I mean, in the few moments of clarity in which I felt like I could get my head around the possible thought processes that might lead to a game like Sonic Unleashed, I caught myself wondering how the two completely contradictory ideas therein even came to exist within a single development team working on a single game, and then I had to reboot.
	Technomage: Return to Eternity review (PSX) Reviewed by Cornwell on January 31, 2010 - # So, who has heard of Technomage? Admittedly, the very fact that you are reading this heavily suggests that you do, but you have to admit, this was a very quietly released game, made by the German company Sunflower. Again, not heard of them? It's okay, neither had I. So, an all but unheard of game, made by an all but unheard of company. This never bodes well.
	Joshua and the Battle of Jericho review (NES) Reviewed by aschultz on January 31, 2010 - # Given Wisdom Tree's notoriety in retro circles, their take on the mediocre puzzler Crystal Mines should not have been any good. Yet while most of Wisdom Tree's games copied from other genres and forced Bibilical stuff in, most of Joshua's hundred levels create small stories so it doesn't feel like just an action puzzler. Though the puzzles are quite good too, as Joshua blasts around with his trumpet (how Jericho was destroyed, you know,) collecting five question blocks and adequate...
	NCAA Football 09 All-Play review (WII) Reviewed by randxian on January 27, 2010 - # NCAA Football 09 for the Wii sports the All-Play gimmick that is supposed to help video game football newbies get acclimated to the game. However, the game is so poorly executed that it’s a bigger rip-off than the outrageous prices you pay for concessions and programs at sporting events. EA really fumbled the ball with the awkward controls and overall presentation, making the game virtually unplayable.
	Bayonetta review (X360) Reviewed by pickhut on January 24, 2010 - # At first, I was concerned about getting into Bayonetta, due to my "experience" with the Devil May Cry series. Now, as of this writing, I've only completed Devil May Cry 1 and played the Devil May Cry 4 demo, and I was terrible with both. In DMC1, I was dying at least... a million times in every chapter, and in the DMC4 demo, the boss killed me. I didn't think the boss death was bad at first, until a DMC expert I knew told me it was an extremely easy boss to kill. So, with those two wonder...
	Lady Tut review (APP2) Reviewed by aschultz on January 24, 2010 - # I believe Lady Tut is the first game I ever solved, and it was worth it. Three-level deals that wiped me out with a roided-up version of the first level after one loop don't count. Neither do games that repeat at the highest difficulty. LT is a series of nine mazes with exotic monsters and turnstile doors that flip ninety degrees so you can alter the maze. Pick up one key and open a lock to the next level--or, later, go get another key way on the other side of the maze, to open the SECOND...
	Snack Attack review (APP2) Reviewed by aschultz on January 23, 2010 - # Too many dot-maze games risked little in aping Pac-Man. Snack Attack commendably bent dots-in-maze conventions to bizarre and individual effect. Its three-level loop featured garish orange walls, gumdrops worth one (green) or two (red) points, a wind-up noise to start things, and a stupidly smiling pumpkin that appeared at random intervals in the center. The screen top flashed WRONG at those who dared breach the EDL; axis of moving. So wonderfully childish, and my first concern troll, too...
	Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles - The Crystal Bearers review (WII) Reviewed by disco on January 23, 2010 - # The magic is gone. It vanished over a thousand years ago, when the Yuke Tribe lost the war and was wiped off the face of the planet. With no one around to cast spells or summon monsters, technology took center stage. Civilization has progressed from a bunch of warring factions into bustling cities and decadent kingdoms. Swords are nothing more than relics; even the lowliest of soldiers carries a rifle. Even the chocobos, those iconic beasts of the Final Fantasy universe, are outpaced by a...
	Type Attack review (APP2) Reviewed by aschultz on January 23, 2010 - # Space Invaders was the first game I got tired of on my 2600. Even zapping the lowest enemies got easy. I learned the 112 different games were just a few options. Type Attack replaces zapping aliens with letters, then words, as they invade. A curtain comes down if too many escape. I learned to touch type quickly to break the high score list.
	Borderlands review (X360) Reviewed by Suskie on January 23, 2010 - # I’ve only ever played Borderlands cooperatively, so I can’t really comment on how it holds up as a solo experience. I’ve heard mixed things – some say it’s fine, while others think it’s boring as hell. Maybe it is; maybe if you’re thinking about investing in Borderlands but won’t have anyone to play it with, you should reconsider. It’s not in my place to say. Usually, that alone would instantly doom the game’s chances of reaching greatness, because I’ve always said that multiplayer...
	Torneko: The Last Hope review (PSX) Reviewed by joseph_valencia on January 21, 2010 - # Whenever I finish an RPG, I usually wait a year before replaying so that I can forget most of the dungeon layouts. You see, knowing where you are and where to go can be kind of boring. “Design,” as some call the tendency toward static maps, is overrated in this genre. This is why I find roguelike dungeon crawlers to be so addicting. No two floors are the same across different playthroughs, and you never you know what awaits you past the next exit. “Torneko: The Last Hope” refines a particular va...
	Castlevania: Symphony of the Night review (PS3) Reviewed by zippdementia on January 19, 2010 - # I can almost hear the speech Koji Igarashi gave when he pitched Castlevania: Symphony of the Night to his staff (imagine the following being spoken in Japanese):
	Brutal Legend review (X360) Reviewed by Genj on January 16, 2010 - # Eddie Riggs is the world’s greatest roadie working for the worst heavy metal band. Following a stage accident, Eddie inadvertently summons the beastly fire god Ormagöden and is transported to a fantasy world of METAL. Brütal Legend’s opening segments are exhilarating. Eddie awakens in a temple surrounded by demonic monks ominously chanting unholy prayers. Taking a nearby gigantic axe, you then start cleaving enemies in two while the doomy riffs of Black Sabbath echo through the room. Mi...
	Pinball Dreams review (PSP) Reviewed by fleinn on January 15, 2010 - # --
	Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem review (GCN) Reviewed by bloomer on January 13, 2010 - # Eternal Darkness (ED) arrived for the GameCube with a fearsome aura about it. In common with Resident Evil Zero, this horror opus was originally slated for release on the Nintendo 64, before that console's premature exit prompted ED's migration to the next console generation and its entering into an even more drawn out development period. When the game finally emerged, it commanded immediate awe from anxious GameCubers, who had heard that it was going to be the next killer app, yet...
	Hottaman no Chisoko Tanken review (NES) Reviewed by aschultz on January 11, 2010 - # Hottaman no Chisoku Tanken transliterates gloriously to "Hotman," but that's the only smile I got from this game. It's a dig-in-the-earth game with big levels, power-ups, secret doors, hidden treasure, odd bug enemies and teleports. Find four keys and the exit for a new level. Weak level design and grossly unfair random events, though, mean fifteen looping levels provide very little adventure. Hotman is not the game its title deserves.
	Call of Duty: World at War review (PS3) Reviewed by Probester on January 10, 2010 - # Call of Duty: World At War is a good example of money cow milking at work. Following the success of Call of Duty 4, the people behind Call of Duty must have thought “Let’s go back to World War II, except we’ll just port over this new system that people like!”, then proceed to churn out copies of World at War. The result is something that is barely redeemable as a game.
	The Saboteur review (PS3) Reviewed by Probester on January 10, 2010 - # The Saboteur is an excellent game. That said, it seemed like someone might have snuck into the game studio before mass production and sabotaged the project before it was released. The otherwise excellent ideas and aesthetic styles clash with an overly simplistic gameplay system and a plethora of glitches.
	Uncharted 2: Among Thieves review (PS3) Reviewed by Suskie on January 10, 2010 - # If I learned anything from playing BioShock, it’s to be suspicious of any game that receives overwhelming praise for reasons that seem entirely unrelated to gameplay itself. Call Uncharted 2: Among Thieves a “cinematic” experience all you want, but that alone never would have sold it to me, because a game needs to function as a game to be worth my time. Let’s also take into consideration that the first Uncharted was – let’s face it – nothing special. I enjoyed it, sur...

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