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Review Archives (Reader Reviews)

You are currently looking through reader reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Take 'em Out (Amiga)

Take 'em Out review (AMIGA)

Reviewed on February 18, 2011

The intriguing story of police-cadet Murphy is not told in this game. In fact, the direct writing is almost non-existent. There is a dire tune being played on the loading screens, along with an equally dire and business-like voice reminding you to “fire when ready” at the shooting range. But beyond this, there's absolutely no context offered whatsoever. You are special forces. And you are shooting lawbreakers until there is no one left. The game then prompts “no one left – moving on to new targe...
fleinn's avatar
Torchlight (PC)

Torchlight review (PC)

Reviewed on February 16, 2011

Your first step into Torchlight will put to rest your worries or quell your doubts. The rich art style with appropriately used earthy colors and a darker, grimmer setting tell you that this is a far cry from Fate's somewhat confused atmosphere. Where the latter is cartoony and a tad happy-go-lucky forced into the same bed with violence, blood-letting and terror, Torchlight is consistently dark and moody. It doesn't pretend to be My First Diablo Clone, but knows what players are looking for. It s...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Moonstone (Amiga)

Moonstone review (AMIGA)

Reviewed on February 14, 2011

“The Gods Pause for a Moment to Contemplate Your Fate”. A subtext on a loading screen.
fleinn's avatar
Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit (Xbox 360)

Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit review (X360)

Reviewed on February 13, 2011

Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit is a difficult product to pitch. To NfS, Burnout, and racing fans who haven't played it yet, this really comes off looking like nothing new or stellar. And you know what? They would be correct. For Burnout players, Criterion sets the stage in another fictional location, Seacrest County, and dares its fanbase yet again to make risk-taking the name of the game. If you want to go faster and abuse that boost meter, you gotta drive on the wrong side, nearly rub othe...
pickhut's avatar
Godzilla: Monster of Monsters (NES)

Godzilla: Monster of Monsters review (NES)

Reviewed on February 13, 2011

Godzilla: Monster of Monsters was the game I had been dreaming of as a child. What young Godzilla fan and budding b-movie enthusiast wouldn't want to play a game where you pound the pavement as Big G, smashing civilization, torching familiar faces of the rogues gallery like King Ghidorah and Gigan, and giving the JSDF a torturous migraine? The thought gave me a nerdgasm.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 2 (PlayStation 3)

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 2 review (PS3)

Reviewed on February 12, 2011

Early on in Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II, our hero, Starkiller, escapes from a cloning facility in Darth Vader's TIE fighter. The caped arch-villain watches as his failed protégé takes to the air and escapes the Empire's custody, setting the stage for yet another attempt at rebellion. The scene is beautifully rendered, as all are in The Force Unleashed II, adding a touch of Hollywood authenticity to the production. But this one scene, beautiful and fleeting, breaks any sen...
asherdeus's avatar
Phantom Fighter (NES)

Phantom Fighter review (NES)

Reviewed on February 10, 2011

It's pitch-black and freezing. The wind doesn't chill your bones as much as the stillness hanging over all the Chinese villages. The hustle and bustle of human life had been replaced by the horrified screams of the villagers as the kyonshis, undead creatures of East Asian folklore, devoured them, and then there came only complete silence. Even the insects dare not buzz and pasturing animals remain invisible. If a man were to listen ...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Super Meat Boy (PC)

Super Meat Boy review (PC)

Reviewed on February 07, 2011

Like all good stories involving giant saw blades, exploding pieces of sentient meat, and evil fetuses, this one is about a girl.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
The Sims 3 (Xbox 360)

The Sims 3 review (X360)

Reviewed on February 07, 2011

The Sims 3 is everything casual games strive to be. Whether you’re a fan of the wildly popular virtual life simulation series or not, there’s never been a better time to jump in than now. There’s something for everyone here, all presented in the attractive signature style that made the series so popular in the first place. The Sims isn’t a series that necessarily caters to any one type of gamer specifically. Instead, it makes a far more ambitious appeal to society as a whole, offering an unrival...
Calvin's avatar
Hydlide (NES)

Hydlide review (NES)

Reviewed on February 05, 2011

Hydlide is madness contained within a plastic gray cart. To play it for too long and contemplate its dimensions and features is to go insane. It's an RPG of the worst sort, one that pads its gameplay out with grinding and guessing and gives you nothing else--no plot, no side quests, no other clues or NPC. You explore the tiny area to which are confined, bump into scores of enemies in order to kill them, listen to the same looping and overly high-pitched music, and perish many times in ...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Eternal Sonata (Xbox 360)

Eternal Sonata review (X360)

Reviewed on February 01, 2011

Eternal Sonata is a J-RPG in which you follow a group of anime-inspired characters through an adventure that seems like most every other. Among the main three characters are Polka, a terminally ill teenage girl who's going on a soul searching journey; Allegretto, a homeless guy who excels in swordsmanship and has the hots for Polka; and Fredrick, the incarnation of renowned pianist Fredrick Chopin who is convinced that the fantastical world that Polka and Allegretto live in is his dream a...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Krazy Kreatures (NES)

Krazy Kreatures review (NES)

Reviewed on January 30, 2011

No lovable Russian ballet or upbeat tunes. All you get to start with is silence and an empty rectangle with a cursor inside. Before you can yawn, it rains cats and dogs. Literally, cats, dogs, and a few other animals begin piling up in the rectangle, and it's your duty to sort them out, making vertical, horizontal or diagonal trios of each animal to clear them off the screen and score. Later levels use “things”, which must be arranged in quartets; people in quintets; and monsters in sextets. Eac...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Sega Touring Car Championship (Saturn)

Sega Touring Car Championship review (SAT)

Reviewed on January 30, 2011

The Saturn has been home to many a racing title, mostly created by Sega's own departments. They all tend to vary in quality, but regardless, each of those titles are memorable for something. Daytona USA, the big one, is a flawed port, but still enjoyable thanks to fun play mechanics, good track design, cool bonuses, and a great, cheesy soundtrack. Sega Rally Championship is known as a solid port, despite suffering from being too much of a straight one. Manx TT has sheep. You get the point. So wh...
pickhut's avatar
Blood Drive (Xbox 360)

Blood Drive review (X360)

Reviewed on January 28, 2011

If you remove the hearts from Twisted Metal and Left 4 Dead and boil them down to their core ideas, what you have in Blood Drive is a near perfect fusion of the gameplay found in each. Twisted Metal has you steering cars occupied by sadists in a demolition derby and Left 4 Dead has you killing endless waves of zombies. Blood Drive has you participating in demolition derby events while running over loose zombies that have roamed onto the field...
asherdeus's avatar
Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time (PC)

Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time review (PC)

Reviewed on January 27, 2011

Doc Clock: The Toasted Sandwich of Time wants to tantalize you with inventive gameplay and a fabulous 2D side scroller environment like a viewing into the past. However, one fatal flaw brings the whole construct crashing down. Building different devices to survive the hazards of the future is an intriguing idea, one crushed by shaky and inconsistent physics.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Xexyz (NES)

Xexyz review (NES)

Reviewed on January 24, 2011

Humanity nearly wiped itself clean off the map, and the Mother Nature attempted to aid the process with a few hundred natural disasters. Peaceful fairies then came along and built a nation on the bones and smoldering ruins of humanity and called it Xexyz. To keep peace and order, they established five cute anime girls as princesses, and everyone lived happily ever after.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
C: The Contra Adventure (PlayStation)

C: The Contra Adventure review (PSX)

Reviewed on January 23, 2011

This easily could have been an instance of jubilation of multiple satisfactions... had Konami grown a brain. I mean, Legacy of War sucked, big time, so logic would dictate the company would do everything in their power to ensure the successor would be a high quality product. But, for reasons that will forever mystify the universe, Konami allowed Appaloosa Interactive to, literally, take another stab at a Contra title. Nevermind Konami's stupidity for a second, Appaloosa could have taken this opp...
pickhut's avatar
Mass Effect (PC)

Mass Effect review (PC)

Reviewed on January 23, 2011

fleinn's avatar
Cave Story (Wii)

Cave Story review (WII)

Reviewed on January 20, 2011

I knew after ages of searching through scores of dull family games, pointless platformer reboots, and obscure puzzle games that I would find a WiiWare game actually worth the price of admission. This game, ladies and gentlemen, is Cave Story. Never mind that this game is free on PC, the Wii version gives us a few new goodies, as well as updated graphics and sounds, the ability to use a controller instead of relying on a keyboard, and the same amazing gameplay that make it worth the $12 ...
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood (PlayStation 3)

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood review (PS3)

Reviewed on January 18, 2011

Even before its release, Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood was the victim of utter scrutinization. Many knew the premise, but most wondered if the ideas present weren’t more than fancy add-on content. Multi-player they said. You don’t need to make an entirely new game for that! Angry retort from the R.E. 5 fans I suppose. How so many could say such a thing about one of the most ingenious, incredible franchises is beyond me, especially after the sequel. It now seems that I...
True's avatar

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