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Review Archives (Reader Reviews)

You are currently looking through reader reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Heavy Unit (TurboGrafx-16)

Heavy Unit review (TG16)

Reviewed on July 15, 2004

I’ve decided I have to be some sort of mentally ill glutton for punishment. You see, when confronted with a shooter of the lowly caliber of Taito’s Heavy Unit on the PC Engine, the average player likely wouldn’t get too far. They’d start up the game (likely because its somewhat suggestive title tricked them into believing they were playing some old-time masturbatory hentai shooter like Divine Sealing), immediately watch their underpowered ship get wiped out by the horde of skeletal (yet durable)...
overdrive's avatar
Ecstatica (PC)

Ecstatica review (PC)

Reviewed on July 13, 2004

Ecstatica is a survival horror game that few have played and many have missed out upon. Unlike most games of the genre which tend to start off slowly and allow the horror to slowly creep up on you with chilling awe it kind of throws you in the middle of it with horrid creatures roaming around after the seemingly innocent young traveller who has no idea what his or her (you can pick the sex of the character) fate is. He arrives at the small village of Tirich in hope of picking up some water for...
goldenvortex's avatar
Golden Axe (Arcade)

Golden Axe review (ARC)

Reviewed on July 12, 2004

Golden Axe is a game that will remain close to me until they shut the lid on my coffin. For over a decade me and some of my close friends have beaten this game countless times together and also solitarily although I had finished the console translation of the game on Sega’s own Mega Drive, or Genesis, whatever! It was years, however until I actually played the original Arcade version of the game, and I was almost blown away with not just the graphical and sound differences but also the massive ...
goldenvortex's avatar
Yu-Gi-Oh!: Forbidden Memoires (PlayStation)

Yu-Gi-Oh!: Forbidden Memoires review (PSX)

Reviewed on July 12, 2004

The Yu-Gi-Oh! franchise has been growing quite a bit, trying to become the next Pokemon in terms of popularity. The Yu-Gi-Oh! games have always been a mixed bag; some are pretty good, and some really, really suck. This game, in particular, is one on the bottom of the barrel.
heroofthewinds's avatar
SoulCalibur (Dreamcast)

SoulCalibur review (DC)

Reviewed on July 12, 2004

Most competent Dreamcast fighting game reviews talk about this game mechanic or that, as though the reversals of Dead or Alive 2 are somehow superior to the reversals of Virtua Fighter 3. I suppose there's merit to that approach. However, in Soul Calibur's case, the reversal (parry) system isn't what sets the game apart from the crowd. The eight-directional mobility and high/mid/low combination systems (both of which have become 3D fighting mainstays) don't differentiate ...
lilica's avatar
Super Hang-On (Genesis)

Super Hang-On review (GEN)

Reviewed on July 12, 2004

One of my least favourite genres of games are racing games and although a few of them have appealed to me over the years. One of these games was “Super Hang-on” for the Sega Genesis or Mega Drive, a motorbike racing game that was the sequel to the Master System game “Hang on”. The 16-bit version was released on the Arcade as well as the Genesis but that’s not being reviewed.
goldenvortex's avatar
Mike Tyson's Punch-Out! (NES)

Mike Tyson's Punch-Out! review (NES)

Reviewed on July 12, 2004

Most gaming protagonists do not need our help, for they have been blessed with the skills, weapons, physique and mentality to win at all costs. They strut about the screen, preening and flexing and sneering dismissively at all who dare inhabit their personal space. Look at these heroes! Solid Snake’s only true obstacles are the hundreds of girls who flock after him, Cloud Strife fears nothing but a bad hair day, and Mario can barely sneeze without knocking a dozen Bowser’s into a pool of molten ...
kingbroccoli's avatar
E.V.O.: The Search for Eden (SNES)

E.V.O.: The Search for Eden review (SNES)

Reviewed on July 11, 2004

E.V.O was a bizarre and original SNES game that mixed elements from an RPG with that of action platform game, adding it’s own unique elements producing a very original game that was interesting to play through and also providing new features that most gamers hadn’t experienced before. The game also had a very strange storyline that absorbed various ideas from the story of Creation and the Charles Darwin theory of evolution. Two theories of life that most people tend to believe in and also disp...
goldenvortex's avatar
Ghosts 'N Goblins (NES)

Ghosts 'N Goblins review (NES)

Reviewed on July 10, 2004

It’s said that whatever doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. But Ghosts ‘n Goblins undresses that reassuring bromide conclusively: this NES cart can hardly kill you, but is nonetheless thoroughly debilitating.
denouement's avatar
NHL '98 (PlayStation)

NHL '98 review (PSX)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

There comes a time in every reviewers life when he has to defy common sense, shut down a large portion of his brain and dive into the neon trash-can that is franchise sports. EA Sports is generally the main offender, churning out the same mindless rubbish year after year, and it just so happens that they are behind the NHL hockey series! NHL ’98 was my introduction to the sleazy world of fast-paced action and 12-month updates, and I can’t see my intrigue stretching much further after what I’ve w...
kingbroccoli's avatar
God of Thunder (PC)

God of Thunder review (PC)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

Usually the excitement that surrounds a free game lasts from the time the download starts, to the time the game actually begins. It certainly may be a big buzz to be able to experience a game for the price of nothing, but eventually reality sinks in and you realise that there is a reason why the game is considered valueless. God of Thunder is an exception, split into three parts, and each individual section offering some great gaming, its value as a giver of entertainment far outreaches its non-...
kingbroccoli's avatar
3D Movie Maker (PC)

3D Movie Maker review (PC)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

If you're the kind who just loves getting out there and making your own home movies, but find your scope limited by the low-quality of your mummy's camcorder, then Microsoft may just have the right little tool for you! What they've given us access to is 3D Movie Maker, a simple but effective program that can easily convey that maelstrom of ideas floating about in that (beautiful) head of yours. Hosted by a purple, Scottish directorial type named McZee (most likely an off-shoot from the Barney fa...
kingbroccoli's avatar
Kirby's Dream Land 2 (Game Boy)

Kirby's Dream Land 2 review (GB)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

“Kirby! Your arch-enemy King Dedede has been possessed! You must save him!”
kingbroccoli's avatar
Super Mario Advance (Game Boy Advance)

Super Mario Advance review (GBA)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

Super Mario Advance, a dual Mario game, has crashed onto the fledgling Game Boy Advance system with a moderate amount of style. This cartridge contains two old ''classics'', Super Mario Bros. 2 and the absolutely ancient Mario Bros. These two games meld together to make a gaming experience that is at times endearing, but ultimately unfulfilling.
kingbroccoli's avatar
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (Game Boy Advance)

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone review (GBA)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

Yet another eerie hallway looms in front of you. You creep down it - ever so slowly - daring not to make a noise. Hideous gargoyles and grotesque oil paintings line the walls, making you wish you hadn’t left your invisibility cloak tucked away in the sock drawer. It’s quiet...too quiet. You can’t hear a thing above the frantic racing of your heartbeat, its rhythmic pounding even managing to drown out the chattering of your teeth. You extend a cold, clammy hand and grasp the doorknob in front of ...
kingbroccoli's avatar
Syphon Filter 3 (PlayStation)

Syphon Filter 3 review (PSX)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

Rarely in the history of gaming has there been a more apt name for a particular game's character than Gabriel Logan. The star of the Syphon Filter franchise can indeed flit around any given landscape with the grace and agility of an archangel and, when the time comes, emerge from the wilderness and tear his unsuspecting opponents opponents apart with the ferocity of a wolverine. The first two Syphon Filter outings were major successes due largely to this intuitive combination of espionage and ac...
kingbroccoli's avatar
Final Fantasy VIII (PlayStation)

Final Fantasy VIII review (PSX)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

As the sun sets and dusk approaches, the two tribes draw near. They're shouting, brandishing weapons, and waving silk banners of all kinds of colours. As they get closer the din rises, and insults that would strip paint off a wall are hurled backwards and forwards. Blood is going to be spilt.
kingbroccoli's avatar
Mortal Kombat II (Genesis)

Mortal Kombat II review (GEN)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

I'm not here to lambast Mortal Kombat II for its ridiculous interpretations of the laws of physics. Some might call it nitpicking, if I were to rebuke the game for the way it's characters move as if underwater, throwing themselves around the combat arena with careless abandon, lazily sticking a leg out behind them in a vain attempt to undo their opponents. Surely it would be unjust if I were to classify MKII on the way the shadows of the combatants lift off the ground on occasion, and constantly...
kingbroccoli's avatar
Batman Returns (Genesis)

Batman Returns review (GEN)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

The Gotham City I know is a source of mystery and wonderment. It’s an eclectic amalgamation of monolithic skyscrapers, scraping the heavens with their neon trappings; and shadowy alleys, where the hefty criminal element lurks. Countless lights punctuate the night sky – giving the desolate streets a highly misleading impression of safety - but one punctuates harder than a dozen consecutive exclamation marks. It’s a majestic motif, emblazoning itself powerfully against the stars, calling the city’...
kingbroccoli's avatar
Conker's Bad Fur Day (Nintendo 64)

Conker's Bad Fur Day review (N64)

Reviewed on July 09, 2004

Yes, you can laugh as Conker the Squirrel lurches on-screen and slices the hapless 64 logo in half. You can laugh your silly little brains out for all I care. But should you not also stop and use those shrivelled brains to think for a moment? Yes you jolly well should, ignoramus! That poor logo is just as much a motif – a telling symbol of the game to come – as it is a comic device, and don’t you forget it. Conker’s Bad Fur Day is the Norman Bates of video games. It is a game full of halves and ...
kingbroccoli's avatar

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