Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for PC games. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

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	Paradise Heights 2 review (PC) Reviewed on May 16, 2004 Is it possible Paradise Heights achieved enough popularity to warrant a sequel? Could that game, so devoid of memorable or exciting characters and storyline, have succeeded based solely on its lascivious adult content? Hard to imagine, yet Paradise Heights 2 exists nonetheless. Credit should go to the developers of this follow-up. Rather than simply churning out a game of equal quality to the original, the team clearly worked to improve every aspect in the sequel, if only slightly....
	Paradise Heights review (PC) Reviewed on May 16, 2004 Based on arguably specious reasoning, I've concluded that the producers of Paradise Heights passionately hated making this game. For Exhibit A, I present two quotes from the main character, lifted from the opening introduction where he reflects on his time spent as a computer game programmer.
	Clockwerx review (PC) Reviewed on May 14, 2004 Sammy spins left, Sammy spins right. Sammy sees the green rod coming! Sammy tries to duck and weave and avoid a collision, but the green rod is too clever for Sammy. The two collide in a fiery explosion that totally decimates poor Sammy.
	Time Stripper Mako review (PC) Reviewed on May 08, 2004 Foster may have been the greatest bishoujo game developer ever, but the English speaking world would never know it. Only three of their products were ever translated, all a part of Otaku Publishing’s mid-90’s attempt to popularize the genre. Two of these were the first insipid installments of the Paradise Heights trilogy. The other, and best by default, was Time Stripper Mako. To be fair, this title does have some superior features: namely multiple endings and some oddball humor. D...
	Aliens Vs. Predator 2 review (PC) Reviewed on April 27, 2004 “Scary as hell” is a term I rarely, if ever, use to describe a game. So many games that claim to be frightening end up being relatively low on the scares due to poor atmosphere, weak gameplay, or a little of both. I can honestly admit that Aliens vs. Predator 2 had me scared, but only for exactly one/third of the game. You see, this game lets you play as three wildly different races, the standard Marine, the badass Predator, and the freaky-as-hell Alien (dubbed Xenomorph by the in-gam...
	Water Closet: The Forbidden Chamber review (PC) Reviewed on April 24, 2004 There are times when you hear or read the title of a game, and right then, without question, you know you must buy that game. Sometimes, a name might remind you of an old favorite on a long-obsolete console, recalling the fond days of your youth; for instance, when I heard of Metroid Prime, I thought of the joyous hours I had playing Metroid and Super Metroid so many years ago. Immediately and without reservations, I wanted the new title. Other times, a name may represent a proven series ...
	Ragnarok Online review (PC) Reviewed on March 20, 2004 Ragnarok Online (RO) is a very, very basic MMORPG (Which is a ridiculously long acronym for the even more ridiculously long phrase Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game). Really, you don’t get much more simple than this. But hey, simple isn’t always a bad thing. What do you do in Mario Brothers? You run and jump.
	Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing review (PC) Reviewed on March 17, 2004 I’ve never played a game like Big Rigs. It’s a racing game, with trucks. You may first think that it’s simply an 18 Wheeler: American Pro Trucker rip-off. If it tries to be, it’s not. Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing is honestly one of the worst games in all of history, for a variety of reasons that make themselves clear from the moment the game is started. I thought I knew what I was in for when I started up the game, because I’d read all the reviews for it beforehand: many c...
	Three Sisters' Story review (PC) Reviewed on March 14, 2004 You click and click and click. At first, the story seems interesting because it feels just around the corner from some hot, lusty naked cartoon action. Oh yeah, you're just a few scrolls of text away from the throbbing thrillhammer, huh... Yeah, just keep reading that insipid story about a family torn apart by corporate greed. The backdrop sets itself fast enough and the pace seems set to race toward wild teen orgies at any moment.
	Dungeon Keeper 2 review (PC) Reviewed on March 08, 2004 Dungeon Keeper 2 is quite simply one of my favorite games. It was the sequel to the hugely popular Dungeon Keeper 1 and improves so much on that already excellent game that it has achieved the status of pure strategy game heaven. Ironic really when the game sees you take on the role of the Keeper of an underground dungeon dedicated to smiting the forces of good and establishing your evil reign across the land!
	Command and Conquer: Renegade review (PC) Reviewed on March 07, 2004 The rush you experience from rushing squads of tanks and soldiers into an enemy base is a memorable one- just ask any Command & Conquer fan. Westwood’s renowned real-time strategy franchise has captivated gamers for a long time, even though the game was a little light on the “strategy” side. As other RTS games focused more on micro-management, complex formations and the like, Command & Conquer continued to deliver the fast-paced missions and entertaining cutscenes that made the s...
	EVE Burst Error review (PC) Reviewed on February 28, 2004 The strength of Eve Burst Error lies in how the pieces are assembled, revealing just enough to keep you excited without spoiling the surprises yet to come — and let me tell you, the writers really like to mess with your mind.
	Broken Sword: The Sleeping Dragon review (PC) Reviewed on February 18, 2004 Broken Sword, the award winning series, finally makes a long-awaited return to the pc and a new generation of consoles alike. Revolution promised changes this time however and their claims haven’t gone unfulfilled. Scrapping the tried and tested interface of old, in favour of a bold new design, our old friends George and Nico return from their previous global adventures to thwart another worldwide disaster.
	Sim Golf review (PC) Reviewed on February 13, 2004 Spare me the responsibility of running an entire community that struggles with basic city troubles like dangerous crime, disgusting pollution, nuclear meltdowns and giant radioactive man-eating beasts crawling up the skyscrapers -- I'd much rather kick back with SimGolf, where my biggest objective is satisfying players with interesting holes, scenic views, and a variety of useful facilities. Buying a piece of land in the arid desert of Phoenix or tropical Hawaii provides its own sets of c...
	Ace of Spades review (PC) Reviewed on February 06, 2004 There's a casino-bar where all the big movers like Mr Sidewalker go, where the playboys about town don't have to bet money (or anything apparently) and where half the staff seem to be enslaved by the other half. Playboys who win at blackjack and poker are fed the slave staff for nasty bondage sex, and then can play their way through to having the dealers and hostesses as well. This is the big bright cheery world of Ace of Spades (AOS), a hentai game of no repute alternating simple, rapidf...
	Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines review (PC) Reviewed on February 03, 2004 ''Okay men, it doesn't look good... Our spy got killed trying to steal an enemy uniform. Our truck was blown up with our driver in it. The marine and me are left stranded in this building, and the sapper and the sniper are left hiding in the ruins, with an enemy patrol heading straight for them. There's only one thing for it....''
	Connections review (PC) Reviewed on February 03, 2004 There are some words that, while individually appear harmless, placed together make a terrifying combination. It's like putting ingredients for a bomb together, or something. One of those words is 'Educational'. Sure, it may bring up memories of days at school where the teacher who you know hated you more than everyone else made you read your 'F' grade homework to the class, after which the school bully hung you up by the underpants, but as a word it's not all that offensive. Another word is 'ga...
	Dungeon Keeper review (PC) Reviewed on February 03, 2004 Most games cast you as a simpering, whiter-than-white hero, who (most RPG games excepting) has virtually no character flaws and is always tall and handsome, or thin and pretty. The sort of people who in real life everyone would just hate ! And so it is with great pleasure that I tell you that Dungeon Keeper by Bullfrog encourages you to bring merry hell upon these people, and then some. At last, justice is served.... on a platter!
	The Curse of Monkey Island review (PC) Reviewed on February 03, 2004 A quick recap: (This paragraph contains MAJOR SPOILERS for the first 2 Monkey Island Games - you have been warned). The Monkey Island saga features Guybrush Threepwood, a young pirate, LeChuck, his undead nemesis, and Elaine, his true love. In the first game, Guybrush is a fairly young boy who wants to become a pirate. You take control as Guybrush arrives on Mêlèe Island, hoping to achieve this lofty goal. While on the island he meets and falls in love with Elaine Marley, the governor of the isl...
	The Secret of Monkey Island review (PC) Reviewed on February 03, 2004 It would be easy to simply fill this review up with pirate-y puns and lame pirate or monkey related jokes (after all, that's what the game did). I'll try my best not to though!

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