Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for NES games. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

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	Predator review (NES) Reviewed on September 12, 2005 Predator is one of my all time favorite movies. Featuring a group of tough army soldiers sent to a Central American jungle to kill Colombian drug smugglers and who then proceed to run into a huge problem not of this earth, it was an incredibly fun and action-packed movie. It also featured one of my favorite enemies ever, The Predator, who was just too bad ass for words to describe. When I heard there was a NES game for it recently, I was estatic. Finally, I could get a chance to play one of my a...
	Super Mario Bros. 3 review (NES) Reviewed on September 04, 2005 They say nothing in this world's perfect, and I suppose that's true. But there are some things out there that seem to be so flawless, so impressive, so ingenious down to the tiniest detail, that we can't help but declare them, if not perfect, then perfect enough. Take Super Mario Bros 3 for example. Not only was it light years ahead of anything that came before it, but it was light years ahead of everything that came afterwards as well. It seems like Nintendo took every detail that I think i...
	Secret Scout in the Temple of Demise review (NES) Reviewed on August 26, 2005 You find yourself in a dense jungle, just one pudgy little boy scout all alone. Walking along, you see a lone savage, crouching atop a temple. He lunges at you, knife in hand. Your only hope is to stave him off with your kung fu knowledge, kicking him mercilessly until he falls. But beware, as some, um, things are flying at you as well. I think they're traffic cones. Skillfully weave your way through these hazardous safety cones and destroy the vile savage. Free to move onward, you find a...
	Dash Galaxy in the Alien Asylum review (NES) Reviewed on August 26, 2005 I laughed when I first saw the box art to this game. Hopefully most of you know of Flash Gordon, the old pulp sc-fi hero who fought Ming the Merciless and the subject of a 1980 movie. This movie is, objectively, rather poor, but is still incredibly fun to watch. You can't help but smile at the horrid lines ("What do you mean, 'Flash Gordon approaching?'"), the hammed up acting, the blatant 1950s look, the brilliant cheesy yet heart pounding theme song, and the goofy plot. Well, it's obvious ...
	Duck Tales review (NES) Reviewed on August 16, 2005 When it all comes down to it, the 80s (and early 90s, I guess) were just so superior to the this strange new culture of today. Just look at all your Disney themed games today. How many of them are worth playing? Very few would be the best answer, and there aren’t too many folks excited about playing Donald Duck or Tarzan when they could be playing the multitude of other high quality games around. But back in the glory days of the NES, we didn’t have that problem. Disney games were actually *gasp...
	Super Mario Bros. review (NES) Reviewed on August 07, 2005 According to those boring writing classes I had to take way back when, all essays should start with some introduction, some hook to get the reader interested. And yet, what can I say? You've heard it all already: 14 or so variations of the game that started Nintendo's dominance, a dozen or so appeals to nostalgia, 8 different methods of calling the game groundbreaking or revolutionary, 6 or so history lessons about the video game crash, and even one or two jokers comparing Mario to a certain d...
	Ice Climber review (NES) Reviewed on July 13, 2005 I still fail to see why the general gaming population loves so many of these retro re-releases. I was looking through the “NES Classics” series (a.k.a the 'take advantage of our fan’s stupidity' series) and found the dreaded “Ice Climber” on the roster. Ice Climber was a bad game in 1983 so no matter how many times you try to repackage it and pimp it out today, it’s still going to suck. However, after the two Eskimos made their return in Super Smash Bros. Melee with new kick ass attacks and the ...
	Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti review (NES) Reviewed on July 09, 2005 At first the explicit violence that Splatterhouse is best known for makes it seem like a pretty unlikely choice for an SD game, but it actually ends up being the best entry in the series.
	Blaster Master review (NES) Reviewed on July 08, 2005 Sometimes I think I’m too hard on storytelling in today’s video games. Yeah, sometimes plots get overly convoluted and sometimes you’re stuck in control of a “hero” who looks, sounds and acts like a reject from some ultra-lame boy band, but do I really have the right to complain? I’m from the old school, where stories were non-existent much of the time. And you know what? We often were grateful when those “plots” didn’t actually weave their way into the fabric of the actual game!
	Donkey Kong review (NES) Reviewed on July 06, 2005 Frankly, I was dissatisfied when I first played Donkey Kong. In five minutes, I had cleared three levels and had made the horrific discovery that the game had reached its limit. Yes, Donkey Kong may be Nintendo’s true shiner when it comes to its long list of overrated NES “classics.” It was very disappointing but not as disappointing as this piece of information: They’ve repackaged this grossly overrated title and are charging it for four times its worth in their “NES Classics” range on the GB...
	Dig Dug review (NES) Reviewed on July 02, 2005 How would you feel if your lovely garden was wasted by a bunch of alien bastards? Yeah, you would go into your shed, pick up your favourite bicycle pump and forcefully evict the little cretins from your backyard paradise. That’s precisely what has happened to Dig Dug, the misplaced spaceman (He really does look like an astronaut!). Without a thought for his personal safety, he goes down on a digging expedition to pump these invaders bodies full of air and clean his garden from these alien scum...
	Yoshi's Cookie review (NES) Reviewed on June 12, 2005 I'm still waiting for Nintendo Puzzle Collection to be released in the US, although that's looking rather unlikely. I like Tetris clones, and the thought of three of them at once seemed cool. Dr Mario will be instantly recognized among Nintendo fans, being the most famous Tetris Clone since, well, Tetris. Panel de Pon may confuse some, but perhaps you might know of its US releases as the Yoshi-themed Tetris Attack on the SNES or Pokemon Puzzle League/Challenge on N64 and GBC, respectively. Thos...
	Yoshi review (NES) Reviewed on June 12, 2005 I like Tetris clones. There’s just something about pouring all of your concentration into getting your colored pieces of something or other into just the right place in time, trying not to panic as you fix your mistakes, and smiling at your high score that makes them fun. I just like it when they’re done right. Incidentally, my favorite one (Tetris Attack) features Yoshi, so I wondered if this one would turn out nice and peachy as well. It turns out the answer is no. There are some good ideas he...
	F-15 City Wars review (NES) Reviewed on June 12, 2005 I got new socks today! They're all nice and bright white and so warm and comfy and everything. See, my old socks were getting a bit worn, so I had to get new ones. Isn't that neat? No? So why am I telling you all this? I suppose I could relate my experiences with F-15 City Wars, a rather obscure NES game I played, instead. But in all honesty, I found the socks to be more exciting.
	Balloon Fight review (NES) Reviewed on June 10, 2005 Starbuck faces shortcomings in technology that don’t hinder his enemy. When he manages to pop an enemy’s singular balloon (to William J. Starbuck’s advantage, he has two balloons!), they have parachutes that allow them to fall gently, often allowing them to float above nearby suspended rocky ledges, as opposed to the infested waters below, where Kazak the space mutant fish would surely like to devour them.
	Jaws review (NES) Reviewed on June 10, 2005 Your average encounter with Jaws himself plays out just like any other confrontation; he’ll swim back and forth as you spew rice at him. He’ll swim in your general direction, but unless your deep-sea diver suddenly loses all of his motor skills, the shark will never catch you.
	Monster Party review (NES) Reviewed on June 09, 2005 There’s just something about this game – maybe it’s the unhappy looking skeletons bathed in an ocean of blood, I don’t know – that tells me Nintendo didn’t screen it for potentially offensive content quite as thoroughly as they normally do.
	Jackal review (NES) Reviewed on June 02, 2005 Back in 1988, Konami-designed Metal Gear hit America and earned release on the NES. Its combination of action and espionage was critically acclaimed and paved the way for one of the most successful franchises of recent memory.
	Friday the 13th review (NES) Reviewed on May 13, 2005 At first, you’ll be reduced to throwing lowly rocks at a being so untouchable that, according to the films, shotgun blasts don’t even affect him.
	Adventure Island II review (NES) Reviewed on May 13, 2005 Hmmm, does a NES game where a short, chubby guy is off to save the local damsel in distress sounds a wee bit familiar? Nope, I’m not talking about one of the Super Mario Brothers games, although you could be forgiven for thinking so. Thanks to the overwhelming success of that series, it seemed like most third-party companies had a hankering to get a piece of the “short, fat hero” pie.

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