Review Archives (All Reviews)

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	F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin review (X360) Reviewed on March 05, 2009 Refined, often impressive, yet ultimately empty, there's simply none of Monolith's renowned creativity on display here. Producing a more polished version of your four-year-old near-masterpiece doesn't quite cut it, in a world where the genre is rapidly maturing and evolving into a new beast altogether.
	Secret Wives' Club review (PC) Reviewed on March 05, 2009 Now instead of simply clicking through a bunch of text and making the occasional decision, you're asked to make choices from a menu. The three women you hope to "educate" are each assigned columns. Your goal is to please all three of the horny vixens. Each has numerous scenes from which to choose, all divided into categories for your convenience. Mostly, these relate to the state of the relationship and predict how things are about to go so that you can decide where to budget your time.
	TrackMania DS review (DS) Reviewed on March 05, 2009 The DS version doesn’t do a very good job at selling itself. More on that later, though, because while at first I suspected that Trackmania was going to be collecting dust on my shelf alongside Trace Memory and Lost in Blue, I have found myself playing it every night without fail.
	Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon review (DS) Reviewed on March 04, 2009 Spend a few hours with any Fire Emblem game and you’ll see why the series is revered in the world of turn-based strategy games: Its emphasis on the immediate and long-term effects of death is brilliant. The knowledge that each downed soldier is down for good makes you more considerate of individual lives. Being more considerate, in turn, makes you more cautious, less reckless. You come out of a Fire Emblem game a better player than you were when you entered.
	Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence review (PS2) Reviewed on March 04, 2009 It has been nearly five years since the release of Metal Gear Solid 3, and in that time I can think of no game I’ve enjoyed more. The gameplay and narrative of MGS3 is far above those of the previous games, though I don’t mean them disrespect in anyway. MGS3 was simply the culmination of the strongest elements of the previous two games, while adding its own powerful flavor to the mix. MGS3 contains so much variety, so much depth, and so many possibilities that even well after 20 playthroughs I h...
	Retro Game Challenge review (DS) Reviewed on March 03, 2009 Nostalgia is a powerful thing. It strikes when you least suspect it, in that one, awe-inspiring moment in which you realize what you’ve forgotten. What you’ve left behind. Sure, you might be immersed in some hundred-hour RPG, or slaughtering random baddies with your huge arsenal of high-tech weapons. You enjoy what the current generation of games can offer you. There’s nothing wrong with that; gaming has come a long way in the last twenty years. If you’re old enough, you can appreciate such adva...
	Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers review (WII) Reviewed on March 03, 2009 Slaying is such a guilty pleasure. Really, it is. You might deny it, claim that you derive pleasure from something more intellectually stimulating. Something nicer. But once you’ve gotten a taste, it’s hard to stop. It’s beautiful, mesmerizing in its own disturbing way; the blood doesn’t just seep out, but gushes forth in a glorious fountain of gore. The dismembered limbs don’t just fall away, but go flying across the room and leave splattered trails in their wakes. The heads are especial...
	Hello Kitty's Cube Frenzy review (PSX) Reviewed on March 03, 2009 HELLO KITTY
	Resident Evil: Code Veronica X review (PS2) Reviewed on March 02, 2009 When it comes to Resident Evil, I openly admit to being a fanboy. I buy the comics, the toys, the skins and any other gimmick I can find; most of it in anticipation for Resident Evil 5. I’m so eager, in fact, that I was willing to play Code Veronica based solely on a rumor that it contained a very short—albeit significant—plot revelation for the upcoming RE 5.
	Prinny: Can I Really Be the Hero? review (PSP) Reviewed on March 01, 2009 Rather than working to avoid such situations, the developers do their best to replicate them numerous times throughout each zone. Stages seem to have been built specifically to trick you into making mistakes. You'll find moving platforms that look like they should require a double jump, only to to realize too late that they actually don't. Or you'll leap across a wide gap only to immediately run into a wall of waiting projectiles that you couldn't possibly have anticipated. Fireballs often come out of nowhere. Enemies materialize from thin air. Monsters float down from above when you had no idea they were even there. Too much of the experience comes down to tedious trial and error.
	Flower review (PS3) Reviewed on March 01, 2009 The whole thing comes off as an interactive Fantasia: a beautiful and poignant blend of sound and movement that tells an active story.
	Street Fighter IV review (PS3) Reviewed on February 27, 2009 Though I didn't find a convenient way to determine a competitor's skill level until after he beats me—or loses—that didn't actually work out too badly. I'm someone who likes to get right into another round of fighting, anyway, and the current system makes that easy to do. Besides that, lag is minimal. I've played quite a few matches and only once did I find things lagging. Really, the only complaint I have with online is the obvious one: scrubs. I don't mind that people almost always fight using Ryu, Ken or Sagat (I like some of those guys myself), but some players try to play mind games.
	Deadly Creatures review (WII) Reviewed on February 27, 2009 Similar to Super Mario Galaxy, Deadly Creatures will take you through each desert environment in ways you never imagined. Walls are so easily traversed that you may begin to lose track of your surroundings. This illusion is broken – beautifully and sometimes hauntingly – when fighting an opponent that suddenly loses his grip and falls off what appeared to be solid ground.
	X-Blades review (PS3) Reviewed on February 27, 2009 Ayumi has to be somebody's wet dream. The press releases talk-up the sexy art style, and emphasize how both action and anime fans will slobber over her figure and fighting moves. And no doubt, some people will be drawn to her brash attitude. But the girl can only take the game so far, and she's been outfitted in a stagnant ensemble.
	Skies of Arcadia review (DC) Reviewed on February 26, 2009 A game doesn't necessarily have to do anything different to be a good one. While many tout games such as Donkey Konga or Rez for their "innovations", they forget that a simply yet expertly crafted game almost always ends up offering more beef than these so-called breaths of fresh air. Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Metroid, Doom; many of the games considered to be revolutionary classics never really revolutionized anything at all, polishing their wheels to a perfect shine as opposed to reinventing t...
	Sonic's Ultimate Genesis Collection review (X360) Reviewed on February 25, 2009 As a compilation, Sega Mega Drive Ultimate Collection has several flaws.
	Leather Goddesses of Phobos review (APP2) Reviewed on February 25, 2009 While "Tame" doesn't allow even remotely suggestive language, in "Lewd", anything goes. Sexual encounters are spelled out and dirty language is recognized by the computer. Obviously, that was the only mode I ever played, although, upon further review, the sex scenes aren't any more titillating than those in the average romance novel read by bored housewives looking for any sort of release from day-to-day life with their unemployed husband who just drank himself to sleep in front of the television yet again.
	Quest 64 review (N64) Reviewed on February 24, 2009 The Nintendo 64 has only one great RPG, and it is not Quest 64.
	The King of Fighters Collection: The Orochi Saga review (WII) Reviewed on February 23, 2009 ...all of the games are emulated wonderfully - without any sound problems that sometimes plague compilation discs.
	DJ Max Portable Emotional Sense - Clazziquai Edition review (PSP) Reviewed on February 22, 2009 Face it, DJ Max is too tough for you. The twitch rhythm game's reputation is based on insane difficulty. For normal people, the highest eight-button setting exceeds impossibility. Six-button mode merely approaches that insurmountable level. Five-button mode, meant as a baby-step in training, brings its own hindrance: as the fifth button can be covered by either hand. Even four-buttons, the absolute floor, can produce anguish on the tougher songs. So consider DJ Max Portable Emoti...

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