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Review Archives (All Reviews)

You are currently looking through all reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.

Available Reviews
Lylian: Episode 1: Paranoid Friendship (PC)

Lylian: Episode 1: Paranoid Friendship review (PC)

Reviewed on March 10, 2011

Some time into her stay, she mysteriously finds her restraints loose and door unlocked. Free to explore the bleak and darkened corridors of the institute in search of donuts and a kidnapped Bob, the child encounters many bizarre phenomena. Crazed nurses wander the halls, determined to kick the girl into submission, while donut-stuffed fatties try their best to crush her beneath their obese weight.
wolfqueen001's avatar
Zunou Senkan Galg (NES)

Zunou Senkan Galg review (NES)

Reviewed on March 10, 2011

The diva sees you struggling, curls her fat lips into a smug smile, and makes another demand. “Oh, and do that without continues,” she says with a sassy shake of her hips. You get three lives in ZSG and not a single continue. It demands that you grab 100 pieces from a potential 100 or more levels without getting a single game over, and with only one hit per life.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey (DS)

Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey review (DS)

Reviewed on March 10, 2011

Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey is something of a departure from Atlus's more recent first-party titles: it is very unlike Persona 3 and Persona 4. It is relatively light on plot (and named characters), and instead is much more focused on being a good old-fashioned dungeon crawler. Fans of Nocturne will feel right at home.
lassarina's avatar
Silent Hill 3 (PlayStation 2)

Silent Hill 3 review (PS2)

Reviewed on March 09, 2011

What began as uncommon brilliance on the PlayStation, has degraded into a convoluted and senseless exercise in flexing visceral muscle while offering less and less in the way of engaging play. And the downward spiral began here.
Masters's avatar
Bulletstorm (Xbox 360)

Bulletstorm review (X360)

Reviewed on March 08, 2011

The game’s a riot, and if supposed top-tier titles like Call of Duty: Black Ops and Killzone 3 are any indication of the degree of stagnation the genre is suffering from, then Bulletstorm is exactly the kick in the nuts that mainstream gaming needs right now. Do what you wouldn’t do for MadWorld: Buy it, and tell the industry that you want more games like it.
Suskie's avatar
Magicka (PC)

Magicka review (PC)

Reviewed on March 06, 2011

The sexiest thing to come from Sweden since Ingrid Bergman.
BLAH_Or_blah's avatar
Final Fantasy (NES)

Final Fantasy review (NES)

Reviewed on March 05, 2011

There was a time when most of my friends were discovering girls and I was completely ignoring them. I had bigger things to worry about, like how to best destroy Kary and restore the fire crystal. While most of my friends were talking about boobs and making out, I was talking about swords and critical strikes. Final Fantasy was one of those gateways to the realm of extended virginity, but it was a blast.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Quattro Adventure (NES)

Quattro Adventure review (NES)

Reviewed on March 03, 2011

Masochists never back down from a challenging or particularly awful game. We do, however, tend to shy away from multiple turkeys on one cartridge. It's as though Codemasters knew our weakness and developed Quattro Adventure to break us. No, not developed; turned loose. Many were wounded, some even perished, but a few rose their heads up high and said, “I survived Quattro Adventure!”
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Who's That Flying?! (PC)

Who's That Flying?! review (PC)

Reviewed on March 01, 2011

The story begins with you – Guardian of Earth – standing trial at the Galactic Council of Space Justice for allowing the planet to be invaded. It isn't particularly deep - it doesn't need to be - but the trial scenes that intersperse the levels are well-made and humorous.
PAJ89's avatar
Dead Space (Xbox 360)

Dead Space review (X360)

Reviewed on February 28, 2011

Visceral wove traditional jump shocks into a surprisingly subtle art form. They know, as you do, that horror isn’t just about making an ugly monster jump out at you; it’s also about making you think that an ugly monster is going to jump out at you, and Visceral balances these two with startling finesse.
Suskie's avatar
Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale (PC)

Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale review (PC)

Reviewed on February 28, 2011

Everyone salutes the knights in mythril armor, the adept mages and wise wizards, the swift thieves and rogues, and dual-sword wielding rangers of the elvish variety. They praise the questing heroes because they had the best weapons and armor and gained just enough levels to pummel that malevolent otherworldy being who threatened to enslave humanity.
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Hard Corps: Uprising (Xbox 360)

Hard Corps: Uprising review (X360)

Reviewed on February 28, 2011

Just by looking at one or two images of Hard Corps: Uprising, you can tell it's a product of Arc System Works, or, "those dudes that made Guilty Gear". With 2D graphics, colorful worlds, fluid animation, and characters that could pass for GG fighters, it has a distinct familiarity to it. Hell, Bahamut, the protagonist, could pass for Sol Badguy's long lost brother!
pickhut's avatar
Ikaruga (GameCube)

Ikaruga review (GCN)

Reviewed on February 27, 2011

I will admit I am not a fan of Treasure. But I have to give them some credit; they made their latest game, Ikaruga, sound not only interesting, but innovative as well. Talks about switching between black and white really sounded cool and made Ikaruga sound like the future of videogames.
Halon's avatar
Halo Zero (PC)

Halo Zero review (PC)

Reviewed on February 27, 2011

I remember on April Fools Day 2005 when Gamespot joked about Halo 3, stating that it's rumored to be a RTS. They probably didn't fool anyone, but it wasn't long before a Halo game that didn't stick to the series' traditional first-person view would be released. Although it was never “officially” released, Halo Zero quickly became one of the most popular Halo mods, despite being a 2D side-scroller similar to the Half-Life 2 mod: Codename: Gordon.
Halon's avatar
One Chance (PC)

One Chance review (PC)

Reviewed on February 26, 2011

One Chance is a bad game for obvious reasons. The graphics are poor, the music is repetitive, the guy walks slowly, the story is silly, player interaction is minimal, and victory is achieved through repetition instead of mastery. Its claim to fame is that you only have one chance unless you game the system.
zigfried's avatar
Mass Effect 2 (Xbox 360)

Mass Effect 2 review (X360)

Reviewed on February 24, 2011

If I’m struggling to record my thoughts on Mass Effect 2 it’s because it excels on so many fronts and does so many things right that it’s hard to settle on just one thing. So I’ll ramble in a word document instead, talk about a few things that caught in my mind and then reveal that I’ve hardly scratched the surface.
EmP's avatar
Canabalt (PC)

Canabalt review (PC)

Reviewed on February 24, 2011

I view people who subscribe to the holy book of Canabalt the same way that Orson Scott Card intended readers to view Xenocide's Qing-Jao: as obsessive and deranged failures, compulsively tracing lines in wood until they realize they've accomplished nothing. Then they die.
zigfried's avatar
Dragon Quest Heroes: Rocket Slime (DS)

Dragon Quest Heroes: Rocket Slime review (DS)

Reviewed on February 23, 2011

You just know that they have a story. I mean, they have to! There’s about a million of them! For every Goomba or similar cannon fodder video game bad guy that just puts on the uniform and goes to work, hating its life, there’s a guy like Rocket who I would suspect loves to go up against some knight trying to save the world from the Evil Lord So-and-So.
Mega5010's avatar
Ikari Warriors (NES)

Ikari Warriors review (NES)

Reviewed on February 23, 2011

In the sky, a violent bang and a crash landing. A plane falls, its muscular gun-toting cargo shuffling out disheveled and disoriented as a flood of villainous soldiers surges toward them. Did SNK intend for the crashing plane to be an allegory for what you are about to play--a disaster? Was SNK sitting in the pilot seat, laughing as you sign up for an impossible voyage into the raw heart of depravity, where you will spin a drunken dance around a hailstorm of bullets?
JoeTheDestroyer's avatar
Antipole (Xbox 360)

Antipole review (X360)

Reviewed on February 23, 2011

The gimmick is simple. Go to the right and win. You can jump, you can shoot, and you can invert gravity within a certain radius of the character. And that's it. There's no plot or villain, just you, a plasma rifle, and a hellish maze of circular saws, moving platforms, and angry robots.
dragoon_of_infinity's avatar

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