Review Archives (All Reviews)

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	Outlaw Golf 2 review (PS2) Reviewed on September 22, 2005 I don’t know the ins and outs of golf by any means. Smacking the balls with absolutely no form intended is the length of my skill. So I choose rather to hit the fabricated lynx, where I don’t have to know anything about the game to enjoy it. I don’t need talent there because all I need is a decent controller and tolerable mechanics. So why on earth did someone create Outlaw Golf 2 and completely ruin my stride?	2/5
	Haunting Ground review (PS2) Reviewed on September 13, 2005 Your vision slowly creeps in on itself, black murk seeping in and covering your gaze. A vision that rattles every few seconds from your heart pounding behind your eyes. Everything is blurry. Your palms are drenched, and each sound that echoes in your eardrums resemble footsteps coming towards you. Your focus flicks back and forth, because every time you look one place, you swear you see something in another. You’re in a state of panic, defined by the dictionary as: A sudden, overpowering terror,...	3.5/5
	The Sims review (PC) Reviewed on September 03, 2005 I don’t get it. I don’t think I’ll ever get it. What the hell is so fun about watching someone else live their life? Why are we obsessed with reality shows like “Hogan Knows Best”, “Nick And Jessica” and “The Osbournes”? Have we suddenly become so desperate to leave our own lives that we will blindly follow someone else’s? I can’t answer that question, I really can’t. So if you sit there and ask me “Why is The Sims so popular” or “Why are there so many expansion packs and sequels to this game” I...	3/5
	Sword of Vermilion review (GEN) Reviewed on August 16, 2005 Sword Of Vermilion is a rarity. Not because it flawlessly combines a sleek RPG style with an action-adventure scheme and not because it was nearly as massive a task as Phantasy Star II but because this monster of an RPG never quite got the recognition it deserved. Matter of fact, I don’t remember it getting any. Much like Shining Force, Lunar and Last Battle—all of which I’m a huge fan of—Sword of Vermilion stumbled into my collection by a chance encounter and a brief “back-box” reading. Though ...	4.5/5
	LandStalker review (GEN) Reviewed on August 14, 2005 Some games have it all. GTA has enough chaos and mayhem to make a life of crime fun. Shadow Hearts: Covenant has everything I look for in an RPG. And Landstalker…ooooh, Landstalker has everything that could possibly irritate me. But oddly enough, I can’t put it down most days. Maybe it’s my strong pride that won’t let me give up or maybe it’s the incredible fun factor wrapped in a “foot-stomping, edge clinging I’ve gotta make this jump I don’t want to climb up here again” annoying package.	4/5
	Syphon Filter: The Omega Strain review (PS2) Reviewed on July 31, 2005 Bio-terrorism is an ugly scar on the face of humanity. Secret wars are waged all over the world to contain and defuse any situation before it leaks out into the public. It’s your job to keep the innocent civilians safe—those civilians who will probably never thank you, appreciate you or even know who you are. For the longest time, it was up to Gabe Logan to stem the countless outbreaks that threatened the very fabric of society. Gabe, however, is no longer just a one-man anti-terrorism unit. Fol...	4/5
	Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas review (PS2) Reviewed on July 22, 2005 Grand Theft Auto has perhaps the biggest cult following of any video game. Ever since part three, GTA has scorched its way across the gaming world as one of the most sought after and anticipated franchises ever. The game is so popular that copycats and mirrored images are being produced faster than a plague, but with its latest installment—San Andreas—Rockstar once again proves in this sick world of free-roaming death and mayhem they are still king.	4.5/5
	Fantastic 4 review (PS2) Reviewed on July 14, 2005 I had no desire whatsoever to play the Fantastic Four video game. The movie looked dull and the comics are a bit too campy for my taste. But if I’ve learned one thing in the several years Marvel has spent trying to branch out, it’s that the company is multitalented. The game wandered into my collection by chance, but it was by choice that my hands were glued to the controller and I found myself unable to put it down until the very end. Marvel has once again proven that it can make great comics, ...	4.5/5
	Shining Tears review (PS2) Reviewed on July 04, 2005 From the original Shining in the Darkness to the mystical yet inconclusive Shining Force III, I’ve always been a die-hard fan of one of Sega’s most prominent RPG series. And while I could mutter eloquent praise for their latest installment—Shining Tears—it would only be from a “fan boy” standpoint. That and I don’t want to be sued by countless people who read this review, spend the money to buy it and find out what a jumbled mess it really is. I didn’t absolutely hate the ga...	3/5
	Hogs of War review (PSX) Reviewed on June 24, 2005 I can’t focus. I can barely muster up enough energy to sit in a chair. My eyes are on fire, my fingers blistered and my answering machine is full because I don’t have time to even pick up the phone. It’s ugly over here. But war is ugly and I’m at war. The sound of swine screaming in the background pierces my mind. The grenades shock me out of sleep like a nuclear alarm clock. The crimson has long turned the ground to mud, leaving it soft enough for the carcasses to seep into their hollow, honor-...	4/5
	Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2005 review (PS2) Reviewed on June 08, 2005 Golf is boring. To me, watching the sport is about as entertaining as throwing money at a comatose stripper. So how can Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2005—a game that is more realistic and down-to-earth then any other golf game out there—be entertaining? Because even though there isn’t much joy in watching the game, there is an insane amount of entertainment that comes from playing it; the elation of smashing balls down the fairway, the agony of pitching them into the sand. PGA tour has swayed from all ...	4/5
	Gargoyle's Quest review (GB) Reviewed on June 02, 2005 Games, at least to me, are my past time. While other children were out digging their baseball kleets in dirt or breaking their noses getting hit by footballs I was blistering my thumbs on nearly every system ever made. I had so many games they all seem like a jumbled mass inside my head if I think about them now. Very, very few stand out and sadly, only about one for each system. There was, and will always be, only one for the gameboy. A game few have probably heard of and even less have played....	4/5
	Dragon Force review (SAT) Reviewed on May 23, 2005 Sequels can be a mess and remakes can teeter on the edge of a needle between outstanding and horrific. While I’m adamant about never begging for anything, I surely wouldn’t be opposed to send a request letter Sega’s way asking them for a re-introduced version of Dragon Force. Of what few epics the Saturn actually produced—most of them being Roleplaying/Strategy games—Dragon Force is the only one that, in my opinion, could go head to head with Shining Force and hold its own. Coming from me that’s...	4/5
	Ten Pin Alley review (PSX) Reviewed on May 20, 2005 Let’s just admit—right now—that we don’t play sports games for the story. While some elements of an intriguing nature could be placed into some of the bigger genres, even Solid Snake couldn’t add any plot to a bowling game. While that’s known and accepted, we instead try our hands for the entertainment and the realism of a sports game—even if it is bowling. If this is a well known fact—that the more realistic and down to earth a sports game is the better—then someone needs to tell ASC the makers...	2/5
	Shining the Holy Ark review (SAT) Reviewed on May 16, 2005 I don't like to hang onto most games after I've beaten them. While everything loses its luster after time, I have no qualms about keeping nearly every "Shining" game ever made. Shining the Holy Ark is just another example of why I never trade them in for something new and why I continue to play them long after the system is geriatric. Although this game returns to its roots and pits you against monsters in a first person style (Much like shining in the darkness) you won’t find yourself missing t...	3.5/5
	The Punisher review (PS2) Reviewed on May 10, 2005 Max Payne and Spider-man were two flagships from completely different genres. One introduced bullet time and showed us a different but entertaing side to Third Person Shooters. The other proved that decent games could be made for comic book characters. Marvel has decided to combine these two masters of painstaking evolution and introduce The Punisher: A violent, grungy look into one of comics most disturbed residents, producing an effort that oozes insidious majesty.	4/5
	Shining Force: Resurrection of the Dark Dragon review (GBA) Reviewed on May 09, 2005 There are few series I have enough faith in to make blind purchases towards. So when I heard the GBA was remaking Shining Force, I was at the store the next day putting down my reserve cash. Resurrection of Dark Dragon goes so much further then I would have ever imagined, and needless to say this is one retro recreation GBA got right.	4/5
	Shining Force III review (SAT) Reviewed on May 07, 2005 Shining Force has always been the pinnacle of Sega’s role playing games. It kept me loyal to the company long after I heard it was on its way out and forced me to buy every sequel made. I still have some of the games even though I don’t have the systems for them. Although Shining Force 3 is lacking one very crucial element it isn’t enough to dissuade this as the best one to date.	4/5
	The Guy Game review (PS2) Reviewed on May 06, 2005 The idea behind “The Guy Game” is similar to playing Trivial Pursuit in a strip club. However, actually playing this horrendous mass of immorality could be compared to stapling your eyelids to a jet plane: there’s absolutely no reason you should want to do it. Nudity or not, this is one game that should keep its top on.	1/5
	WWE SmackDown! vs. RAW review (PS2) Reviewed on May 05, 2005 My previously stated annoyances about this review aside, Smackdown Vs. Raw reminds us that every yearly franchise is under constant scrutiny. As Triple H told Goldberg “It’s easy to get to the top. It’s hard to stay there.” While producing likeable, fresh sequels annually may seem like a daunting task, THQ does it with the poise and confidence befitting a pro.	4.5/5

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